marigo Posted November 13, 2012 Posted November 13, 2012 I met a guy about almost 3 weeks ago and he texted me the night we met. He texted me again the next day and we went out to dinner a few days after that. The date was great and we kissed (okay we made out) and we just cuddled all night and talked. I loved the fact that he remembered little details i told him before our date. I texted him the next day to thank him and tell him i had a great time. He initiated contact after that and our texting became alternate in that he would text me, then me to him and so forth. Our conversations are always fun and he would always ask me stuff about me. He is a very busy guy. Works about 10-12 hours a day and it does take him hours to respond when hes at work which i understand because i do that too. Anyway, he went for a business trip the following week and i knew we wouldnt be talking much just because it sounded like he was gonna be busy while he's there plus the time difference. He texted me while he was there and things seem normal. He wasn't able to respond as much but when he does its usually lengthy or playful. But then i dont know what happened. I dont know if its just me being paranoid because im starting to really like this guy or what but im starting to have this feeling "what if this guy is just being nice to me?" or "what if he's losing interest?" anyway, we didnt talk for two days when he got back. I couldnt control it and texted him on the third day and asked how he was and he wasnt responding and it was a weekend. I started worrying but he responded a few hours later saying that hes really sick. I replied and he stopped. He has a tendency to do that too when we're texting and he'll suddenly stop and i figured thats probably just how he is. So I didnt hear from him again today and im just starting to worry. Now how do I know if this guy is trying to let me down easily or being nice or genuinely interested? Im horrible at dating and im overly paranoid sooo not a very good combo.
clia Posted November 13, 2012 Posted November 13, 2012 Have you only had the one date? If he is interested, he will ask you out so he can spend time with you in person rather than engage in nonsense over text. Also, he will likely actually phone you so he can hear your voice. Honestly, if you've only seen him the one time in three weeks, he likely is extremely lukewarm about you.
clia Posted November 13, 2012 Posted November 13, 2012 I disagree with that 100%. Theres a lot of people out there that LOVE texting, and LOVE receiving text messages. They dont care about hearing the persons voice. The old school method is no longer a valid tool to determine interest. So, you are saying a guy who is interested won't want to spend time with her in person and would rather text? Seriously? I get that some people like to engage in imaginary relationships over text nowadays, but I totally disagree that it will negate him wanting to actually talk to her or see her in person. Even today men who are interested ask women out.
Author marigo Posted November 14, 2012 Author Posted November 14, 2012 Have you only had the one date? If he is interested, he will ask you out so he can spend time with you in person rather than engage in nonsense over text. Also, he will likely actually phone you so he can hear your voice. Honestly, if you've only seen him the one time in three weeks, he likely is extremely lukewarm about you. Thanks Clia for your input! And yes we've only had one date which is the first week that we met. Then the second week, he was out of town for business, and this is the third week so I havent really heard from him except like 2 days ago. Im not a phone person and i do prefer to text just because Im usually exhausted after work that sometimes i still wanna be able to do other stuff and also talk to him at the same time if you know what i mean. I wont really be able to do that when im on the phone with someone. Eh im starting to give up though.
Author marigo Posted November 14, 2012 Author Posted November 14, 2012 You cant. Theres no way to tell if someone if "just being nice". People can speculate about it, but they cant read his mind. I disagree with that 100%. Theres a lot of people out there that LOVE texting, and LOVE receiving text messages. They dont care about hearing the persons voice. The old school method is no longer a valid tool to determine interest. Thanks Malibu406! Yeah you're right. He did seem like a genuinely nice guy who seems like he would respond to someone just out of respect. You are definitely right about the texting as well and to be honest that is my preferred way of communication just because I am a busy person as well. But like i told Clia, i am starting to lose hope and give up on this one. It just makes me a bit sad because things were going great and I have no idea what happened.
Eddie Edirol Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 Even if im sick texting is easy for someone Im interested in. Maybe not talking on the phone, but I think if he was interested, he would have talked to you at some point after the date. he also would have texted more, and not left you on a cliff hanger. My guess is that he has someone on the side that he'd rather talk to.
Author marigo Posted November 14, 2012 Author Posted November 14, 2012 Even if im sick texting is easy for someone Im interested in. Maybe not talking on the phone, but I think if he was interested, he would have talked to you at some point after the date. he also would have texted more, and not left you on a cliff hanger. My guess is that he has someone on the side that he'd rather talk to. Hi Eddie, sorry for the confusion. We kept in contact and texted everyday after the date. We didnt talk/text last Friday and Saturday. I texted him Sunday and he responded telling me he was sick. We didnt talk yesterday and I havent heard from him today. So everyday up until Friday, we were talking.
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