cre8r Posted November 12, 2012 Posted November 12, 2012 Here me out on this...Normally I understand a visit to your gynecologist isn't an experience to look forward to but here's the situation between me and my girlfriend. My girlfriend told me her gynecologist is someone she'd like to hang out with, but nothing sexual. However she had a dream of having one of her appointments and he was in the nude. She even told him about the dream during one of her appointments. On a related issue, I asked her why she prefers a male gyno over a female and her answer was "it's more normal for a dude to do an exam than a woman" which I take as her seeing these exams as something sexual. Her gyno is a nice guy and appears non-threatening. Please, some serious opinions.
GorillaTheater Posted November 12, 2012 Posted November 12, 2012 My first instinct was to say that it's probably about as sexual as me getting a prostate check. Which is to say, not at all. My wife has had a male ob/gyn for decades. I couldn't care less. But hell, she's the one dreaming about him nekkid, and a little more alarmingly, actually telling him about it. So who knows, maybe you actually do have an issue. 1
sweetkiwi Posted November 12, 2012 Posted November 12, 2012 unless your lady is a complete wacko its not sexual. Its being naked from the waist down in a paper gown on a paper exam table, in stirups, having a cotton swap in your vagina while your gyno talks about mundane things so you don't feel awkward they have their hand in your vagina. On a good day. On a bad day you can only imagine. And him being naked in a dream has absolutely nothing to do with sex. Dreams are a way for the subconscious to figure out the outside world. Him being naked more likely means she trusts him and sees him as non threatening.
AlexDP Posted November 12, 2012 Posted November 12, 2012 Yeah. Dreaming about a naked man who touches your vagina has nothing to do with sex. 1
carhill Posted November 12, 2012 Posted November 12, 2012 Relevant to the human experience, the best example I can offer for 'putting yourself in her shoes' is how do you feel when the female GP gloves up and sticks her finger up your rectum and palpates your prostate, and then checks your rectum for hemorrhoids, then puts on a different set of gloves and palpates your penis and testicles for abnormal growths. That ought to put it into perspective. 2
stillafool Posted November 12, 2012 Posted November 12, 2012 I asked her why she prefers a male gyno over a female and her answer was "it's more normal for a dude to do an exam than a woman" which I take as her seeing these exams as something sexual. In my experience the male gynos are more gentle and I just feel more comfortable. 2
Author cre8r Posted November 12, 2012 Author Posted November 12, 2012 Understood that the exams are dreadful, however my concern is if there's some sexual interest (unrelated to the exams) with the doctor, because of the dream and her confessing it to him. And also her attitude of being more comfortable with a male doctor. Apparently she's only been with 3 other men in her life, one of which was apparently a date rape, with that, I would think she'd be comfortable having a woman examine her.
karnak Posted November 13, 2012 Posted November 13, 2012 The countdown timer for your relationship has already been activated. Get ready. She's telling you these things so that, subconsciously, you can prepare for the demise.
nofool4u Posted November 13, 2012 Posted November 13, 2012 Here me out on this...Normally I understand a visit to your gynecologist isn't an experience to look forward to but here's the situation between me and my girlfriend. My girlfriend told me her gynecologist is someone she'd like to hang out with, but nothing sexual. Ya, riiiiiiiiight She wants to hang out with a guy that intimately knows her vajay jay. That would be like me hanging out with a female doctor who has hernia checked me. It would be awkward, unless I got off on the doctor's visits. However she had a dream of having one of her appointments and he was in the nude. She even told him about the dream during one of her appointments. On a related issue, I asked her why she prefers a male gyno over a female and her answer was "it's more normal for a dude to do an exam than a woman" which I take as her seeing these exams as something sexual. Her gyno is a nice guy and appears non-threatening. Please, some serious opinions. It would be one thing if she had a male gyno, as do alot of women. Its quite another to prefer one, tell you she wants to hang out with him, and has dreams of him in the nude. You think she'd want you hanging out with a woman who examined your d!ck on a regular basis?
Author cre8r Posted November 13, 2012 Author Posted November 13, 2012 I appreciate these responses. She thinks this a non-issue but opinions from others may help. I think it's valid to be jealous in this situation. Please, could more women give me their take on this? Thanks again.
Leigh 87 Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 :sick:First of all, why all the appointments to see a gyno? I certainly do not see a gyno regularly. Secondly - as if you would be friend with your gyno, if you had a boyfriend! The guy look at and INSIDE of your girlfriend vagina! Crikey, I cannot imagine anything more inappropriate! ..out of all the people out there, why does she need to hang with her gyno!:lmao: 1
Leigh 87 Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 And Yuck Who gets turned on by ther gyno? I know stranger sex can be hot, but walking into a room and showing a man your vagina is not my idea of .....sexy.
nofool4u Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 I appreciate these responses. She thinks this a non-issue Of course SHE thinks its a non issue.
nofool4u Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 And Yuck Who gets turned on by ther gyno? I know stranger sex can be hot, but walking into a room and showing a man your vagina is not my idea of .....sexy. How about getting in stirrups, showing a man your vagina, then saying, "hey, lets get some lunch or hang out some time"
Balzac Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 How 'bout turn it into role play and then do dinner?
Spectre Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 My girlfriend told me her gynecologist is someone she'd like to hang out with This in itself is already strange. Not exactly a red flag, but why would she want to do this? I'm sure there are plenty of people she can be friends with that haven't seen and touched her vagina multiple times. but nothing sexual. You do realize she most likely wouldn't tell you "I totally want to hang out with my gyno in a sexual way" even if it was true? However she had a dream of having one of her appointments and he was in the nude. She even told him about the dream during one of her appointments Ok so now we have some major red flags. I guess she can't control her dreams..but why is she telling another man she is dreaming about him naked? I asked her why she prefers a male gyno over a female and her answer was "it's more normal for a dude to do an exam than a woman" Explain to me this crazy logic, since you would think she'd be much more comfortable with a female checking her out down there. which I take as her seeing these exams as something sexual.. It's definitely not a good sign to me. Combine that with the dreams? Yeah, I wonder how you'd react if you asked her to get a female gyno?
Balzac Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 GYN docs have regular lives. They are neighbors and friends and customers in restaurants. What's the big deal here? I have GYN docs, of both genders, friends and neighbors.
Spectre Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 (edited) GYN docs have regular lives. They are neighbors and friends and customers in restaurants. What's the big deal here? I have GYN docs, of both genders, friends and neighbors. The big deal would kind of be the naked dreams. Unless..do you dream about your male GYNO's naked? Do you tell your husband/boyfriend(if you have one) about it? Do you then go and tell said GYNO all about it? I'm assuming(and hoping) you don't. Edited November 14, 2012 by Spectre
Balzac Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 I'm a guy. In a general manner of discussion, not revealing patient identity, many women share stories. Keep in mind the degree of trust. The children born into the hands of the physician. Many women transfer highly sensitive feelings. Physicians understand. These physicians diagnosis cancer, perform surgery and touch patients emotional lives at very difficult moments. One woman sharing a dream in an exam room can make for light hearted moment. Physicians in the exam room are nearly always attended by another professional. 1
Spectre Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 But there is still the issue of naked dreams. Unless this was some oddly hilarious joke dream or something, but usually when nudity is involved in a dream it's of a sexual nature(unless you're dreaming about something like showing up for school naked).
Balzac Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 She was honest in her sharing with you. How you chose to interpret her psychological state is on you. Unconscious, subconscious it's not action. Judge by whatever standard you choose.
Author cre8r Posted November 14, 2012 Author Posted November 14, 2012 Thanks Balzac, you raise some good points.
Balzac Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 Be confident in your self. Are there things in life to worry about? Absolutely. Is her dreaming about her physician in that category? Likely not. Focus on her honest sharing. Focus on her blind trust in you having the confidence to handle this. You'll get there. 2
SincereOnlineGuy Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 Here me out on this...Normally I understand a visit to your gynecologist isn't an experience to look forward to but here's the situation between me and my girlfriend. My girlfriend told me her gynecologist is someone she'd like to hang out with, but nothing sexual. However she had a dream of having one of her appointments and he was in the nude. She even told him about the dream during one of her appointments. On a related issue, I asked her why she prefers a male gyno over a female and her answer was "it's more normal for a dude to do an exam than a woman" which I take as her seeing these exams as something sexual. Her gyno is a nice guy and appears non-threatening. Please, some serious opinions. I decided to take a deep breath and hear you out. She isn't exactly 'wrong' (and certainly not out-of-bounds with the line: "It's more 'normal' for a dude to do an exam than a woman" ) (to some, that's a fair/accurate statement). You interpreting that (any way you see fit to choose) IS WRONG. Most of this query hits like a sexual predator deducing that because a victim's body reacts biologically in normal fashion, that the victim is somehow 'consenting' to the assault.
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