If he likes me why did he disappear?

[Left-out]

So I went out a date with this guy the other night. It seemed like everything was going good. We planned to just go to dinner together but we ended up going to the movies and after getting a drink. He said he had a really good time and wanted to see me again. He texted me when he got home to tell me how he had a great time. The next day he texted me and asked how I was doing. I said I was good and asked how he was doing. I haven't heard anything from him since then. I don't understand if he liked me and had such a good time why would he just disappear. Some insight would be much appreciated. Thanks

[Leigh 87]

How long ago since he last contacted you?

 

Not all guys who like a girl, will text them daily.

 

If it is days between texts though I would worry and forget about him.

 

Even the super busy guys will make time for a girl they are really into - not necessarily daily, but they would contact her regularly, every 2 - 3 days, and follow it up with a date once a week if they lived within an hour of each other.

 

Do not rule him out until it is 3 or more days.

 

Even so, some men, when they first get to know a girl, are genuinely busy, and do not know the girl well enough to warrant keeping in regular contact yet.....

[Mrlonelyone]

If this was an online date, well, so many of us have had that experience.

 

1. He found someone else he thinks is a better match.
   
2. He wasn't serious about dating anyone and wanted to see if he could get a date.
   
3. He is married + number two.
   
4. Possibly, just possibly, he likes you too much and is scared or he is using some lame PUA "challenge" technique. Where by being unavailable he keeps you guessing.
   

[OompaLoompa]

Well, guys do that just not to come off as a jerk. And there is no harm for telling the other person he had a great time, even if he really didn't.

Therefore, given that he disappeared, the truth is that he didn't have a great time.

(Or he did but has another girl or found someone else in the mean time, etc)

whichever the case is, he doesn't want to make any further moves towards you.

[Left-out]

Thank you both so much for replying to my post.

Leigh I know not all guys text on the daily but the weird thing is is that he texted me on the daily before we went on our date. I haven't heard from him since Monday.

 

Mrlonelyone yes you are right it was an online thing. I do kinda think it is number 4. He kinda talked about his ex a lot and doesn't seem like he's over her yet.

[Left-out]

There was a good night kiss. We made out for awhile after we got back in his car.

[Leigh 87]

If he has not contacted you since Monday, then he was definately not into you.

 

My boyfriend hates to come on too strong and likes to play it cool, but even he pursued me within a day or two of our first date.

 

Sorry if your upset, but it is just life.

 

How you get on with things will dictate what sort of life you have.

 

Having a happy and positive outlook on life and dating will sure help you to feel better, and to also attract more guy (positive people attract guy, no one wants to spend time with a women who feels sorry for themselves!)

[Imported]

#4 seems to be working as intended.

 

Although I think he is pushing it a bit.

[jcrew11]

Well, the max time would be 3 days between texts, depending on if you 2 were making plans for the following weekend. Guys don't really call "just to talk," they call if they want to go somewhere, go on a date, get some food, get a booty call.

 

For online dating, its so easy to date and communicate with 10 girls at a time, that dating multiple people is almost expected. I'm sure as a girl, you get tons of messages and dates from guys with Online Dating.

[Left-out]

I just wanted to thank everyone for replying to my post. It has helped me a lot.

[Tara247]

This one is simple left-out. He disappeared because he didn't really like you. He pretended he did to spare your feelings. Guys that like girls don't disappear after dates. Please do not call him. Forget him and move on.

 

P.S. I want to make sure I'm reading this right. How long has it been since the last text by this guy? He should be calling you on the phone anyway.

Edited November 11, 2012 by Tara247

[Left-out]

Tara that is what I plan to do. I'm not going to waste my time on someone that not interested in me.

To answer your question I haven't heard from him since Monday

[starla33]

Ok so it does not necessarily mean that he doesn't like you. BUT do you really care at this point? I think you want someone a bit more stable than this.

 

I recently went on a good date and was surprised the guy did not contact me so forgot about him. Got a text from him a week later that his life went crazy and he had to leave the country blah blah not sure when he will be back, but just wanted to let me know.

 

A lot of things come up in peoples lives. With online dating there are SO many options this is unfortunately something you have to get used to. I've been on plenty of great 1st and 2nd dates and never hear from the guys again. At this point I don't take online guys seriously at all until its 5+ dates.

 

Also, I have a rule...if I don't hear from a guy within 3 days I delete their number (this also prevents me from texting them if I happen to be out and get a little drunk). Has been working pretty well so far. Some of them come around and text me again, but at that point my interest is too low.

Edited November 12, 2012 by starla33

[Left-out]

starla33 your right I do want someone more stable.

I do like your idea of not taking online guys serious until 5+ dates

I think I may do that myself.

[harrydubois]

If you want to meet him again, why not just ask him out on another date? At worst he'll say no. I don't think you'll be arrested or charged with anything.