Here is my situation please read and help.

[acbgdb]

Ok here is my story I have been happily married to my wife for 8 years now and before that we date 3 years. We did split up about 5 years ago because she cheated on me. I forgave and forgot that situation but here I have another dilema. We moved to charleston, sc 2 years ago because of my job. During our stay down there she had to sit at home with our 2 beautiful children and became stressed out. I asked her many times to maybe get a job and she didn't want to. But anyway my job went away and we were faced with the dilema of moving back to NC, we made the decision to move back. In March her father passed away (this was before we moved back) so we decided to stay with her mother for a short while to help her cope with the death. So last Thursday she told me she wanted me to leave and just gave me the answer that she is not happy. I did move and have spoke with her since then and she tells me that she wanted me to leave because she does not like having to answer for everything she does. This is where it gets really confusing for me.....I spoke with her last night and asked if we were going to seperate for good and her answer was "probably but I don't know" so I guess my question here is what does this mean and what should I do. I do love her alot and want her back but don't know how to act. Before anyone asks I have never cheated on her, I have always told her where I was going and when I would be back. I am very confused so if this does not make any since please try to read through the lines and help.

 

P.S. I am her first love and sexual partner if this helps anyone answer this.

 

Thank you in advance,

 

Lonely

[overseas2004]

I certainly can sympathize with your situation. That is very difficult for anyone.

 

But you have not given us much to work with. what were your wife's greivances with you? What is it that makes her unhappy. If you don't know then you have no possible way of saving your marriage.

 

If you don't know you need to find out.

 

I doubt it is just that she is going through a mid life crisis. She has mentioned something about having to answer for everything. You may need to explore what that means more.

 

As for getting back together... time will tell. I suggest you take away any pressure now that you have to get back together with her and work on finding out what her greivances are. Then you can discuss with her if it is possible to address them and save your relationship.

 

Regards

 

Overseas

[acbgdb]

Ok here is what I do know. We have two very small children (4 & 2) when we lived in Charleston she stayed home with them all day long. This has stressed her out I know it had to. We had no family and friends down there to maybe watch them to give us a break. She was 16 when I met her and 19 when we got married, she was a virgin and never really dated anyone except me. I love her very much and do want her back but she tells me it is definitely over and there is no chance of us getting back together.

 

This all started in Charleston when I found her chatting on the internet with some guy. I asked her to please stop and it got worse. Now that we live back here in NC she has family to take care of her. She is now talking to more guys on the internet and wants nothing to do with me. As far as her reasons she only tells me that she is not happy and is tired of having to answer for everything she does. That reason comes from all the internet chat rooms. I would not be concerned with this except I was laying in the bed one night and heard her on my laptop and looked over and she was talking dirty to some guy (she is not that type of person), she is very shy and does not start the conversation. She is now asking me how much money I want to give her for my children every week. I know there are people out there that have endured this so please read over this and give me a little advice. I do appreciate the help.

[moimeme]

What does she mean by saying she doesn't like to have to answer for everything she does? Do you quiz her on her activities? Do you still distrust her because of the cheating and so have kept her on a short leash? What's up with that?