cale_920 Posted November 5, 2012 Posted November 5, 2012 My first love (met in 8th grade) basically left me for another guy. We always had a rough relationship, but things got better toward the end. Then she randomly decided to get into my FB and found out I had cheated on her 2 years ago (I was immature, would never do it again) through messages. After that, it got rocky, but we told each other we loved each other and would be okay for about two weeks. Then she told me we needed to talk, and that's when I found out about the guy she had met. They've known each other since 6th grade and she said she's always had a little crush on him. I feel like this is truly the end of it for us. I hope she doesn't enjoy the relationship with him, but I just don't see it. He's more fit, has more going for him, and is more outgoing. What am I to do?
KatZee Posted November 5, 2012 Posted November 5, 2012 I hope she doesn't enjoy the relationship with him That's mature. I mean, you say the relationship was always rocky, and you cheated on her. That's the ultimate betrayal and that's the most disrespectful thing you can do to someone. It's not like you even owned up to it and confessed. She had to snoop to find out. That in and of itself shows there is no trust in this relationship. If there's no trust, there is nothing. And honestly at your age there's no point even fighting for this. If you guys were engaged, or married with kids, I'd say try to get into marital counseling to address the infidelity thing, but you're both kids yourselves. It's not worth it. She was betrayed, she's hurt, she does not trust you, and honestly after she found out, the relationship was done. The relationship as you knew it was officially over at that point and it was never going to come back. You should be wishing her all the happiness in the world because you did her wrong and she deserves much better than that.
Author cale_920 Posted November 5, 2012 Author Posted November 5, 2012 That's mature. I mean, you say the relationship was always rocky, and you cheated on her. That's the ultimate betrayal and that's the most disrespectful thing you can do to someone. It's not like you even owned up to it and confessed. She had to snoop to find out. That in and of itself shows there is no trust in this relationship. If there's no trust, there is nothing. And honestly at your age there's no point even fighting for this. If you guys were engaged, or married with kids, I'd say try to get into marital counseling to address the infidelity thing, but you're both kids yourselves. It's not worth it. She was betrayed, she's hurt, she does not trust you, and honestly after she found out, the relationship was done. The relationship as you knew it was officially over at that point and it was never going to come back. You should be wishing her all the happiness in the world because you did her wrong and she deserves much better than that. Yeah, I had come to terms that she didn't want to be with me and understood it. But then she kept coming at me about it, so I got on board again. Once again, when I did it I was a totally different person. But I feel like I've lost everything; we've been together for 5 years. I'm just confused at this point.
TopCat22 Posted November 5, 2012 Posted November 5, 2012 ^^^^^^ Couldn't have put it better myself. You cheated. Doesn't matter when or why, you did. Now it's come back to bite you. Learn from this. There are consequences to your actions. Apologise to her and wish her well. Then let her go and be happy. Move on yourself and make sure you never cheat again.
Chi townD Posted November 5, 2012 Posted November 5, 2012 Okay, met in 8th grade, relationship for 5 years. That tells me that you two are recently High School grads. Dude, you're young and you screwed up. Learn from this and apply what you've learned what NOT to do in your next relationship. She got hurt and is moving on. You should too. Start NC, heal and move on.
Author cale_920 Posted November 5, 2012 Author Posted November 5, 2012 Just read a thread about GIGS and notice she's had it since we were 15, at least.
KatZee Posted November 5, 2012 Posted November 5, 2012 Just read a thread about GIGS and notice she's had it since we were 15, at least. No one has GIGS at 15 years old. She was just a kid then. Exploring and coming into her own. She was establishing what she wanted and needed from relationships. 1
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