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Does sex change things?

Maximus1108

By Maximus1108
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Maximus1108 Member

Maximus1108

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Hi all

 

First I would like to say how great it is to have found this forum. I've been on some PUA forums but just can't find myself doing stuff like that ie make a girl wait forever and chase you and all that stuff. If I care about a girl I'd like to do the chasing without being desperate of course.

Anyway, I recently had an encounter which ended in sex.We've known each other for a longer time so we were already acquainted. We really connected that night but she didn't spend the night over. Anyway, we didn't make concrete plans to see each other again. Only thing we said was: let's meet again soon.

She didn't send a text that night which I found strange since she seemed to have enjoyed it. I sent her a text the next day and she was like: I enjoyed last night and it was really good to have seen you again.

After that, nothing. (probably busy since she was at her nephew's wedding).

Now my question: can you do a bit more pursuing when you had sex?

And what to text now? Something lighthearted and funny?

 

Thanks!!

phineas Established Member

phineas

Posted
Posted (edited)

First off PUA isn't about liking a girl primarily.

 

Some of it is about getting a girl you like & keeping her but it's primarily for slaying randoms & getting women into bed ASAP.

 

 

CALL her.

Ask her out again.

Edited by phineas
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Maximus1108 Member

Maximus1108

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Yeah that's the best option. But don't you think her text implies something like: it was fun but nothing more. (it was good to have seen you again now bye)

maybealone Established Member

maybealone

Posted
Posted
Yeah that's the best option. But don't you think her text implies something like: it was fun but nothing more. (it was good to have seen you again now bye)

 

It could, or it could mean that she's afraid of what you think of her and of whether or not you like her, so she was trying to play it cool. Especially over text -- you didn't say what you texted her, but no matter what it was it could have come across as you playing it cool. It is so hard to interpret feelings over text.

 

You definitely should call her and actually ask her out.

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Maximus1108 Member

Maximus1108

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Phew, i know you're right about certain things. Some things in my post sounded like i was a selfish jerk. Thanks for pointing that out to me.

I have my doubts though about the way you express things. But thats another discussion :-)

phineas Established Member

phineas

Posted
Posted
Jesus, she was the one who had to get up and get dressed and go out into the night to get back home - and you're whining that she didn't ALSO text you, as well?

 

Are your freakin' fingers broken? Maybe YOU should have called HER to make sure she made it home ok - did you ever think of that?

 

 

That's the mark of a LOUSY lover - you're so completely clueless that you have NO idea whether she was satisfied or not - but I bet YOU were. You suck in bed, obviously. Read up on how to please a woman FIRST before you have your own fun. Here's a newsflash for you - groping her chest for a couple of minutes and jamming your fingers in her genitals for another 2 minutes is NOT how you please a woman.

 

Maybe if you had a clue you wouldn't need to ask a bunch of strangers on a message board why she seemed less than enthralled with that mediocre roll in the hay with you.

 

And yet, this forum has seem tons of guys that make the effort & can't even get a date. ROTFLMAO!

Jane2011 Established Member

Jane2011

Posted
Posted

Call her and ask her out to do something, like see a movie, or go out to eat.

 

Don't know how much the girl likes you, but I know after I've had sex with a guy, no matter what the circumstances, I'm wondering if he's still interested after presumably he got something he wanted.

 

It's nice when the guy is still interested, and actually wants to spend time with you for a non-sex date.

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Maximus1108 Member

Maximus1108

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She likes me a lot and i like her a lot. I maybe acted a bit distant after we had sex.

Anyway, I texted her and I called her but she doesn't answer the text nor the phone. I would really love to know what's going on.

I must say that she was quite uncertain that night...everytime i smiled she asked me why i was smiling. Maybe that uncertainty and me acting distant made her believe that i was just doing it for the sex.

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Maximus1108 Member

Maximus1108

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Was thinking about texting her sister. There's nothing worse than knowing nothing!!

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Maximus1108 Member

Maximus1108

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WTF, she just texted me: don't worry. I went to bed at 10 in the morning and just got out of bed. I'm going to have a snack now and I'll call you afterwards.

 

WHY AM I ALWAYS F*CKING WORRYING??? While most of the time there's nothing wrong!!

 

Maybe I care too much? When it turns out everything's ok I just feel like a total drama queen for thinking the worst case scenario...hate it

NateC Established Member

NateC

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WTF, she just texted me: don't worry. I went to bed at 10 in the morning and just got out of bed. I'm going to have a snack now and I'll call you afterwards.

 

WHY AM I ALWAYS F*CKING WORRYING??? While most of the time there's nothing wrong!!

 

Maybe I care too much? When it turns out everything's ok I just feel like a total drama queen for thinking the worst case scenario...hate it

 

Take a step back and just enjoy yourself. It's going well - don't worry about things as it's not the end of the world if it doesn't go the way you want it to. If you're too worrying, it won't help.

 

Take it easy. :)

Under The Radar Established Member

Under The Radar

Posted
Posted
WTF, she just texted me: don't worry. I went to bed at 10 in the morning and just got out of bed. I'm going to have a snack now and I'll call you afterwards.

 

WHY AM I ALWAYS F*CKING WORRYING??? While most of the time there's nothing wrong!!

 

Maybe I care too much? When it turns out everything's ok I just feel like a total drama queen for thinking the worst case scenario...hate it

 

 

It's a cognitive distortion called jumping to conclusions/mindreading. Try to relax; you are doing fine.

ImperfectionisBeauty Established Member

ImperfectionisBeauty

Posted
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I honestly think it does and the next time I start a relationship I really want to wait for sex until I really like the person and know that isn't all they want.

SJC2008 Established Member

SJC2008

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Jesus, she was the one who had to get up and get dressed and go out into the night to get back home - and you're whining that she didn't ALSO text you, as well?

 

Are your freakin' fingers broken? Maybe YOU should have called HER to make sure she made it home ok - did you ever think of that?

 

 

That's the mark of a LOUSY lover - you're so completely clueless that you have NO idea whether she was satisfied or not - but I bet YOU were. You suck in bed, obviously. Read up on how to please a woman FIRST before you have your own fun. Here's a newsflash for you - groping her chest for a couple of minutes and jamming your fingers in her genitals for another 2 minutes is NOT how you please a woman.

 

Maybe if you had a clue you wouldn't need to ask a bunch of strangers on a message board why she seemed less than enthralled with that mediocre roll in the hay with you.

 

Are you the girl that shoved the cake in her mouth in Anger Management??

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Maximus1108 Member

Maximus1108

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Ah, she came over today and acted stone cold although she was beautiful as always. Acted really distant. We went out for dinner and I somehow managed to melt her. She started enjoying herself, touching me and we ended up kissing and having sex again. After we cuddled and she admitted that she had some regrets about our first time. She couldn't tell why. She says she just wants to have fun but she sure as hell is fond of me. She didn't want to have sex with me when she came over but it happened. And if she didn't want to have sex, then why did she come over :-)

Love...difficult sometimes.

Glad i could share it with you guys...

todreaminblue Established Member

todreaminblue

Posted
Posted
Hi all

 

First I would like to say how great it is to have found this forum. I've been on some PUA forums but just can't find myself doing stuff like that ie make a girl wait forever and chase you and all that stuff. If I care about a girl I'd like to do the chasing without being desperate of course.

Anyway, I recently had an encounter which ended in sex.We've known each other for a longer time so we were already acquainted. We really connected that night but she didn't spend the night over. Anyway, we didn't make concrete plans to see each other again. Only thing we said was: let's meet again soon.

She didn't send a text that night which I found strange since she seemed to have enjoyed it. I sent her a text the next day and she was like: I enjoyed last night and it was really good to have seen you again.

After that, nothing. (probably busy since she was at her nephew's wedding).

Now my question: can you do a bit more pursuing when you had sex?

And what to text now? Something lighthearted and funny?

 

Thanks!!

 

Sex changes everything especially if you are not a casual person, I do think that you can ask her out if you got naked with her, ask her out...two people playing it cool you are going to get a chill.....be direct and honest....i wouldn't write something light hearted ,because that step you took wasnt a light hearted one,say whats in your heart

 

if you want to see her again ask her try not making it about having sex or refer to the sex do that in person if you must and go from there i wish you luck in love....deb

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Maximus1108 Member

Maximus1108

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I already asked her out a second time. She came over and acted cold. Afterwards she told me she didn't have the intention to kiss me or sleep with me. She said she had regrets about the first time. Somehow I managed to melt her and we ended up kissing and having sex. She says she's not looking for a relationship right now. She's been hurt many times. When I brought up another girl I met she really started acting jealous and bitchy.

What to make of this people? I was thinking about not texting her until she texts me.

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Maximus1108 Member

Maximus1108

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Posted (edited)

Also, I have heard somewhere that you have to go by her actions, not by her words. She tells me she doesn't want to have a relationship right now but she keeps coming back and having sex with me. This must mean she has feelings for me. Then again, if she says she doesn't want to have a relationship...she actually means she doesn't want to have a relationship with ME (some people say) Confusing.

Any women out here that can confirm the actions not words theory?

Edited by Maximus1108
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