Sadie_66 Posted November 3, 2012 Posted November 3, 2012 (edited) Please bear with me because this could get long. I've fallen for my sister's husband's brother (basically my brother in-law's brother). We're both single by the way. I thought he was attracted to me too but I just don't know anymore. Sometimes he'll act like it other times he acts like he is not interested in me even as a friend. What gives? I've tried to get close to him and offer support when he's going through a tough time. We've known each other for three years so it's not like we just met yesterday. Just when I think we're making progress, it feels like he shuts me out and won't let me in. If he's not attracted to me that's fine, that's life. I don't get why he won't even let me in as a friend. It's confusing me. I want to at least try to be a friend and support him emotionally. It's just that he can make me feel like I'm somehow bothering him or ruining his day if I try. Maybe I'm overreacting or being too sensitive but it's affecting my feelings. I feel that I keep trying to do the same thing over and over just to get the same results. Isn't that the definition of insanity? I don't want to give up but maybe I misread his signals, even though I'm pretty sure I didn't. Why are relationships so easy for some and impossible for others? What would you do? Should I just stop trying? I'd hate to give up if there is the potential for something more. Chances are that he is probably just not interested, maybe not even as a friend anymore either. Help. Edited November 3, 2012 by Sadie_66
FitChick Posted November 3, 2012 Posted November 3, 2012 He knows you are interested but he doesn't feel the same. If he offers you friendship he might believe you will take it as a sign you want more, which it seems you do. Look outside the family for a boyfriend.
xdahliax Posted November 3, 2012 Posted November 3, 2012 Yes, stop trying. Move on and start considering other options. Don't fawn over him, don't try to get his attention, don't ask him what's wrong. If you do spend time with him, be your usual charming self but let him know you have a lot of things going on and that you're essentially gracing him with your presence. One of two things will happen: he'll either realize he wants more now that you're unavailable or detached, or he'll keep being his standoffish self. Either way is good because you'll get out of this rut; you'll move on with or without him.
Author Sadie_66 Posted November 3, 2012 Author Posted November 3, 2012 He knows you are interested but he doesn't feel the same. If he offers you friendship he might believe you will take it as a sign you want more, which it seems you do. Look outside the family for a boyfriend. Thanks for the replies. Yeah thinking back he made this clear, judging by how fast he left my company the last time I saw him. I guess I must have surprised him. What bugged me about the situation wasn't even him not feeling the same way. It's that I got all the signs so, so wrong and now have probably screwed up the friendship. Well, I'm not going to dwell on it anymore. Time to get over it and move on.
Author Sadie_66 Posted November 8, 2012 Author Posted November 8, 2012 I had a few days to cool off and relax. I realized I jumped to conclusions and overreacted. We patched things up and the friendship is okay.
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