aram7 Posted November 2, 2012 Posted November 2, 2012 why is it that when you ask a girl to hang out, and on that day you pick her up to hang out, its as if she thinks that this is a date! your just in bum clothes, and she's looking really beautiful in a nice dress, makeup, perfume, good hair, jewelry, etc. Why do women automatically think its a date when you ask a girl to hang out?
sweetkiwi Posted November 2, 2012 Posted November 2, 2012 You are asking them to hang out. Alone. Why wouldn't they think its a date unless you're already friends? 1
mysteryscape Posted November 2, 2012 Posted November 2, 2012 if you ask her to spend time with you as a pair, she's somehow going to get the idea it's a date. I don't know where they get these ideas, but they do. If you really want to dress like a bum, and not have her get the idea of dressing up, and not have the idea it's a date, you should tell her in advance. I'm sure she'll appreciate your consideration and smooth manner. 1
somedude81 Posted November 2, 2012 Posted November 2, 2012 ROFL! Usually it's the other way around. At least for me it is. I'm trying to get them on dates and they think we're just hanging out and have no idea I'm interested.
somedude81 Posted November 2, 2012 Posted November 2, 2012 IMO, women should always assume it's date. Him not attached guy, her not attached girl, he wants to bang. With that in mind, it means that if she does go along with the date, that she's at least considering the possibility of banging.
crude Posted November 2, 2012 Posted November 2, 2012 Maybe people just need to be more specific and say you'd like to hang out, it's not a date, I just enjoy your company. Also, women WANT it to be a date, so the guy can pay for everything.
mammasita Posted November 2, 2012 Posted November 2, 2012 All you have to do is say what you mean.....i don't think you're communicating your expectations. 1
sweetkiwi Posted November 3, 2012 Posted November 3, 2012 i've experienced that men who i hang out with and don't date rarely take me serious as a potential girlfriend. They write me off as a fun girl. Not one for a relationship. I don't even want to worry about dating right now. But when i do start thinking about it i'm going to be focusing on what i want and letting a guy court me. Because those are the ones who will more likely continue to court me afterwards.
RachR Posted November 3, 2012 Posted November 3, 2012 I don't think it's a date unless I've been asked out on a date. However, if I like the guy, I'm going to dress up and look nice regardless.
phineas Posted November 3, 2012 Posted November 3, 2012 Why does that "word" mean so much to you? It's just a word to classify a situation between two people who spend some time together in hopes of getting to know one another. I really try not to label (as per your other thread) because it would only make the situation that much more built up. The more any guy/gal think it's a date, the more rules and expectations are involved, and THAT's the last thing I want to do on a "date." I want to be comfortable and my self, and not be worrying about whatever else is going on. I think a lot of guys on LS, we/they know who they are, do this exact thing. They build up the natural process of seeing someone they deem attractive and asking to spend time with them in another environment, a date. over analyzing isn't helpful at all. It should be natural.. if it isn't it's awkward, and if that happens 10-15-20 times, you will begin to question yourself and your self esteem will fall. Then you become spiteful and it's just goes down from there. This isn't a rant toward you Leisure, just in general, for some folks to read... maybe it will take a little weight off, maybe it won't. Maybe it's my age, but I clarify it's date when I ask them out. If they don't want a date then I move on. I don't see the problem. If a woman asks me to do something i'll ask her if she's asking me out or if it's date. If she says no i'll tell her "too bad, i'm only interested in dating right now & i'm busy tonight with a project." Then move on. I've found that women who are sure their interested in you will not turn down a "date"
xdahliax Posted November 3, 2012 Posted November 3, 2012 Maybe people just need to be more specific and say you'd like to hang out, it's not a date, I just enjoy your company. Also, women WANT it to be a date, so the guy can pay for everything. Not necessarily. My male friends usually pay for everything, and I always offer to pay. I normally give back by giving them gifts because that's all they'll accept. Getting a free meal or gift is not worth spending time with someone whose company I don't enjoy. If I want a date, it's because I actually like the person and want to see what the future holds.
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