OneLoveorTwo Posted November 1, 2012 Posted November 1, 2012 It's a long story but I'll try to make it short. I dated a man when I was in my mid teens and he was and still is my first true love. We were both on different paths of life during our relationship( dated for about 4-5 years ) and had hurt each others feelings a bunch of times during it. He went away for awhile ( not getting into what happened) and while he was away I got involved with another man. We dated for about 4 years. During that time 2 1/2 years into my new relationship my true love returned but I was already committed. He went and got involved with a women who was just like the person I was with. Both alcoholics. We talked to each other about what we were dealing with on daily basis but loved who we were with and tried to make it work. I broke down and ended the relationship because it was toxic and not for me. I had talked to my true love and told him I couldn't take my current relationship and had left. He was 2 years into his relationship with the (alcoholic) women and was committed to her so I didn't mention it again. A few months later a man that I had met a LONG time ago ( when I was a young young teen) had got in contact with me after years of looking for each other, and we started talking. We both had got out of bad 4 year relationships so we knew what each other were going through. He lived halfway across the U.S and mentioned he wanted to come see me. ( We are the same age). He flew out and it was love at first sight. He was exactly how I remembered him. All in All, I moved away from home to be with him and couldn't be happier than where I am today. We are going on 4 years together but there is one thing that is still on my mind. My first love. We are friends and talk regularly about our lives and how each other are doing and as of yesterday he told me that he was done with the toxic relationship he has been in. I have always loved him and always will, and it hurts me inside to think, what could of have been if I stayed and not moved. I know where I am is where I want to be, but in the back of my mind and a part of my heart aches. I really needed to get that off my chest. If anyone has a relateable story, it would mean a lot to hear it. Thank you.
mysteryscape Posted November 2, 2012 Posted November 2, 2012 there's something to be said for cultivating your first love and staying with him or her. Something to be said for young marriage to first love! Very little support for that in current society, almost none at all. I've known a few people who've done it despite all the pressures. I know one woman who married her first love. He was the only guy who ever kissed her, and she him. They are fantastically happy in middle age!
ja123 Posted November 2, 2012 Posted November 2, 2012 You are still in love with your first love. Ask him if he feels the same way. If he says yes, then why not try again with him? You will hurt your current man, if you leave; but, you are doing him no favours by staying as your heart isn't his.
2sunny Posted November 2, 2012 Posted November 2, 2012 It didn't work with your 'true love' for a reason - or a variety of reasons. He had his chance(s)! Appreciate what you have. Stay in the present to enjoy daily life. this means stop communicating with the other guy! That's only fair and right for the guy you're with now.
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