chrisswitzer Posted November 1, 2012 Posted November 1, 2012 Okay, so there's a girl I go to college with and we have some mutual friends so we see each other decently often, and we have a class together. She has a long distance boyfriend and they've been dating for a few years. But, he still lives in their home town 2 hours away and they hardly ever see each other. It might be like twice or three times a semester. When we're both sober, we act like normal friends and she doesn't really treat me any different than a friend. There are some body language signs like how she will sometimes hold a gaze a little longer, or face her body toward me when we sit by each other, or graze me with her leg. But, there's not really anything else other than that. It doesn't happen very often though. But, when she's drunk, she acts flirty towards me. It's not like she's hammered when she does it either. She is drunk, but she knows what she is doing. Like at one of the football games a few weeks ago, she randomly comes from the opposite end of the section, hugs me and goes "I love you!" then starts holding my hand as we're talking for a few minutes. Then at a party two weekends ago, she randomly showed up even though she had literally told me all week that she wouldn't come because she would be studying for a really important exam all weekend, and she seemed really excited to see me. Like she hugged me when she saw me, and her eyes lit up and she seemed really happy. Then we danced for a little bit and the entire time, she seemed to be really enjoying herself. She was smiling the entire night and then I walked her home. Then, this past week, she never really even mentioned it and just acted like she normally does when she's sober. I don't get it. Does she actually like me, or is it just the alcohol talking?
Jamesblame Posted November 1, 2012 Posted November 1, 2012 No. They reflect superficial thoughts that may or may not have a deeper relevance. The question you need to ask is: how often do they get drunk enough for you to ask the question.
MrWombat Posted November 1, 2012 Posted November 1, 2012 When we're both sober, we act like normal friends and she doesn't really treat me any different than a friend. … But, when she's drunk, she acts flirty towards me. It's not like she's hammered when she does it either. So she maintains plausible deniability. She has a long distance relationship for sex, and you on a string for day-to-day validation. You don't need this in your life.
Author chrisswitzer Posted November 1, 2012 Author Posted November 1, 2012 No. They reflect superficial thoughts that may or may not have a deeper relevance. The question you need to ask is: how often do they get drunk enough for you to ask the question. One thing that needs mentioned that I didn't mention before is that she's very honest and straight forward. Even more so when she's drunk. Like when she's sober, she at least has some boundaries and knows when not to do or say something, but when she's drunk, everything that she holds back comes out...But, this basically happens every time I drink with her. She'll act really flirty with me and only me. It's really weird. I know girls that get drunk and get flirty with everyone, but she only really does this type of thing with me. Sometimes she'll do it with random people we meet, but she's clearly just messing with them and she'll do it for a minute, then walk away. She doesn't really do it with other guys that she already knows. Like, with other people, she may flirt with them for a minute or something because that's how she is, but with me, she'll do it extensively, and she has that look in her eye when she talks to me. You probably know what I'm talking about with the look. Everybody's gotten it from someone. But, when we're sober, it goes back to normal. It's hard to explain over the computer, but way her eyes light up when she talks to me, and how they don't when she talks to other guys and things like that make it seem like there's something there. What my personal opinion is is that she kinda likes me, and when she's drunk, that comes out, but she doesn't want to jeopardize her relationship, which is why she acts normal when she's sober. I could be completely wrong, but that is what everything that's happening makes it seem like.
2sunny Posted November 1, 2012 Posted November 1, 2012 Being with any drunk gal is not a healthy choice for you!
Author chrisswitzer Posted November 1, 2012 Author Posted November 1, 2012 So she maintains plausible deniability. She has a long distance relationship for sex, and you on a string for day-to-day validation. You don't need this in your life. That makes sense. It's just weird because it doesn't seem like she's like using me or anything. She always seems generally happy to see me and be with me. But, women are crazy so what the hell do I know? lol
WanderingHeart Posted November 1, 2012 Posted November 1, 2012 She likes you as a person, she thinks you're cool. But when she's drunk she finds you attractive. Then when she sobers up, she doesn't. She probably avoids flirting when she's sober because she doesn't want to give you the wrong idea. When she's drunk, she doesn't care about the consequences of hitting on a friend she's just-not-that-into. Sorry man, that's the way it goes. It happens to everybody. What should you do? Back away and start seeing other girls. And if she acts jealous, don't think it's because she's in love with you. She'll just be missing the attention.
veggirl Posted November 1, 2012 Posted November 1, 2012 Does it matter if her drunk self is her "truth"? Do you want a girl that gets drunk and flirts with other guys when she HAS A BOYFRIEND? She just wants attention.
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