bobsmith76 Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Ok, I've been so incredibly reluctant to do this for about 3 months because I know it will just make me angry, and frustrated. But I have to put my profile out there and find out what's going wrong. My response rate on OLD used to be about 1 email responded to for every 8 emails I sent out but my last 60 emails have only gotten one response. I don't know what is going on. I can't believe this because I know my looks are fine, I volunteer, I hate promiscuity, I am dedicated to fidelity and if you read between the lines you'll find out that I am eager to get married and with okcupid at least the women I contact we match on more than 80% of the questions. I know I've been told a few times in the past that I am too intense, too deep or too intellectual but I just can't believe that turns every woman I write to off. They all say they are looking for someone intelligent, well, if that's true, then why aren't they writing me. It bugs me to no end. I don't see how these women expect to get married when they won't even make an effort to get to know the men that are interested in them. Of course there is always the option of dumbing myself down but then if I do that I might miss out on someone that really is like me. Anyway, here's is what my profile says, see if you can figure out what's wrong with it. ***** PLEASE NO COMMENTS FROM GUYS, GUYS CAN'T TELL WHAT WOMEN ARE THINKING ***** Hi! Thank you for checking out my profile. First, let me say that I am passionate about morality, living an ethical life, being decent and using my talents for their greatest good. Because of this I am very serious about falling in love with only one person for the rest of my life and being absolutely dedicated to them. I have no interest in promiscuous, adulterous people. I want to find someone who is as enthusiastic about commitment and is eager to remain half as devoted to me as I am willing to be devoted to them. What I want most from my partner is that she be intelligent, moral and I have to admit looks matter. The second most important part of my being is that I am on feverish quest to literally know everything. I have ambitions to become a great poet/philosopher and I am study non-stop whatever I can from a huge array of subjects. I have an insatiable appetite for books and I need to find some who loves to read. If you cannot understand why it is that I enjoy knowledge so much then a relationship between us will be impossible. I know there are a lot of women who are in to sports and I can understand how exercising makes you healthy and makes you think better but I'm sorry if you're more in to exercising the body than exercising the mind, then we won't get along. Check out my blog to take a look at my writing. Google splendogloria and you should find it. I am very intense about intellectual humility so I am not your standard snob that thinks he's smarter than everyone. My real strength is poetry and literature but one of the best things I ever did was decide that there is more to life than poetry and started studying politics, and then moved on to science and philosophy. I am very enthusiastic about science and study it eagerly. I'm also very big into languages but not anymore. I once had a working knowledge of 11 languages (English, German, French, Arabic, Spanish, Italian, Old English, Ancient Greek, Latin, Hieroglyphs and Sanskrit) but I've probably forgotten Hieroglyphs and Sanskrit. I have no more ambitions to learn more languages because I want to focus on science and philosophy. I also do not fit the stereotype of the mad and crazy poet that can't live a stable life, I am very stable, don't get angry and am very well balanced and well adjusted. I also need to make perfectly clear that just because I love books I am not the stereotypical nerd. I am very smooth in conversation, have a great sense of humor and am charismatic. There is also the very sticky question of religion. I am a strong believer in God but I do not believe in any of the established religions. I used to have a very strong personal relationship with God, and even wrote a prayer book but that kind of relationship is no longer possible. I definitely believe that the universe was created with a purpose in mind. I have no problems with going to church and I've gone to church many times without being a Christian and I feel just fine. I have no problems marrying a Christian but I can't marry a Christian who is obsessed with Jesus. About my job: I work night shift at a hotel. That gives me the opportunity to write my books on the job for four hours every night. I also have no debts, am very frugal and save 20% of the money I earn.
Shaun-Dro Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Ok, I've been so incredibly reluctant to do this for about 3 months because I know it will just make me angry, and frustrated. But I have to put my profile out there and find out what's going wrong. My response rate on OLD used to be about 1 email responded to for every 8 emails I sent out but my last 60 emails have only gotten one response. I don't know what is going on. I can't believe this because I know my looks are fine, I volunteer, I hate promiscuity, I am dedicated to fidelity and if you read between the lines you'll find out that I am eager to get married and with okcupid at least the women I contact we match on more than 80% of the questions. I know I've been told a few times in the past that I am too intense, too deep or too intellectual but I just can't believe that turns every woman I write to off. They all say they are looking for someone intelligent, well, if that's true, then why aren't they writing me. It bugs me to no end. I don't see how these women expect to get married when they won't even make an effort to get to know the men that are interested in them. Of course there is always the option of dumbing myself down but then if I do that I might miss out on someone that really is like me. Anyway, here's is what my profile says, see if you can figure out what's wrong with it. ***** PLEASE NO COMMENTS FROM GUYS, GUYS CAN'T TELL WHAT WOMEN ARE THINKING ***** Hi! Thank you for checking out my profile. First, let me say that I am passionate about morality, living an ethical life, being decent and using my talents for their greatest good. Because of this I am very serious about falling in love with only one person for the rest of my life and being absolutely dedicated to them. I have no interest in promiscuous, adulterous people. I want to find someone who is as enthusiastic about commitment and is eager to remain half as devoted to me as I am willing to be devoted to them. What I want most from my partner is that she be intelligent, moral and I have to admit looks matter. The second most important part of my being is that I am on feverish quest to literally know everything. I have ambitions to become a great poet/philosopher and I am study non-stop whatever I can from a huge array of subjects. I have an insatiable appetite for books and I need to find some who loves to read. If you cannot understand why it is that I enjoy knowledge so much then a relationship between us will be impossible. I know there are a lot of women who are in to sports and I can understand how exercising makes you healthy and makes you think better but I'm sorry if you're more in to exercising the body than exercising the mind, then we won't get along. Check out my blog to take a look at my writing. Google splendogloria and you should find it. I am very intense about intellectual humility so I am not your standard snob that thinks he's smarter than everyone. My real strength is poetry and literature but one of the best things I ever did was decide that there is more to life than poetry and started studying politics, and then moved on to science and philosophy. I am very enthusiastic about science and study it eagerly. I'm also very big into languages but not anymore. I once had a working knowledge of 11 languages (English, German, French, Arabic, Spanish, Italian, Old English, Ancient Greek, Latin, Hieroglyphs and Sanskrit) but I've probably forgotten Hieroglyphs and Sanskrit. I have no more ambitions to learn more languages because I want to focus on science and philosophy. I also do not fit the stereotype of the mad and crazy poet that can't live a stable life, I am very stable, don't get angry and am very well balanced and well adjusted. I also need to make perfectly clear that just because I love books I am not the stereotypical nerd. I am very smooth in conversation, have a great sense of humor and am charismatic. There is also the very sticky question of religion. I am a strong believer in God but I do not believe in any of the established religions. I used to have a very strong personal relationship with God, and even wrote a prayer book but that kind of relationship is no longer possible. I definitely believe that the universe was created with a purpose in mind. I have no problems with going to church and I've gone to church many times without being a Christian and I feel just fine. I have no problems marrying a Christian but I can't marry a Christian who is obsessed with Jesus. About my job: I work night shift at a hotel. That gives me the opportunity to write my books on the job for four hours every night. I also have no debts, am very frugal and save 20% of the money I earn. Your problem is simple. Everything about you is already out there. Women aren't looking for that. There's nothing left to the imagination. Women, by default, are attracted to men they think they can fix. You're already past it. Take me for example. I'm flawed through the roof, got a bad attitude some times, look down on women as sexual creatures that are beneath me, and in turn, they find me a challenge and want to do something about my ways so to speak. I, in turn, get to have sex with them because I'm always very horny for some action from a young dame ready to put out. But the main thing that attracts women to me is their futile fight to understand me. And I thrive on that, not counting these broads on Loveshack, meaning real life. Once you grasp what makes women tick, rather than spending so much of your time writing boring monologues about what a great guy you are, you'll be on your way to some success. 2
CptSaveAho Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 No offense There lacks fun, mystery... you sound boring and insecure seeking validation Whats the purpose of actually dating you and getting to know you when you tell everyone everything about yourself the first time they read your profile Asking for a woman's advice on an online dating profile is like asking a vegan what their favorite cut of steak is. FYI - Online dating is a "breeding ground" I do not know a successful long term relationship from it. 99% of the people there are "users" or "losers" Go out in the real world and meet people face to face. Get advice from MEN, not women on dating.
Author bobsmith76 Posted October 30, 2012 Author Posted October 30, 2012 sorry, no one thinks: "this person is exactly what I'm looking for, therefore I don't want him, because I already know what he's like." Being mysterious is just a gimmick anyway. If you really want to find someone you're compatible with then you're going to have to find out what they're like sooner or later.
mesmerized Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Your profile comes off as too serious and lacks humor and fun. You are also talking way too much about yourself, no body wants to read all that. And yes I'm a woman saying this. 2
Frogwife Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Lifetime SoSuavers "opinions" aside ^^ ... Your profile sounds so negative - everything you don't want, don't have interest in, what isn't going to work between you and your partner... that you've been told you're "too deep, too intellectual" is probably nonsense - you just sound very unhappy. I would read your profile and pass by. You're just trying too hard - when I read a man's online profile - short and sweet is best. Frankly, I just look at the pictures- if I'm attracted, I read the profile and if I like both, I'll respond. I don't know your dating history or if you live in a large city, but if you're feeling down and discouraged about online dating, just take a break for awhile. Easier said than done (I know this from my current experience), but go out and try to meet people in real life - like Meetup groups, lectures, activities at museums, universities, churches - places where you can meet like-minded people
CptSaveAho Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Right.... Im not the one complaining about my lack of success in responses 1 to 60 is a terrible ratio... Even when I was a retard and did OLD, I was 1 for 2 in responses and my profile just said this 1,2,3,4,5,6,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,17 You asked for advice, we gave it to you, its up to you to adapt to the times or keep complaining on the forum -And the Ladies Chimed in and agreed-
yongyong Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 PLEASE NO COMMENTS FROM GUYS, GUYS CAN'T TELL WHAT WOMEN ARE THINKING This is your damn problem. 2
phineas Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Your profile comes off as too serious and lacks humor and fun. You are also talking way too much about yourself, no body wants to read all that. And yes I'm a woman saying this. Of the women I've met from OLD, none of them seemed to have actually read my profile & it isn't that long. From what I can tell they just looked at my pictures.
clia Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Not only is your profile boring, but: You sound condescending and snobbish. Putting people down who exercise or don't read? You even admit you aren't a "standard snob." You spend nearly all of it bragging about yourself. You can tell me about all the languages you used to know in person. The religious stuff is over the top. The part about how you use the time on your job to write books rather than do your job is a huge turnoff. You appear to have no sense of humor. Overall, it's way too long, and as said above, lacks fun. You appear to be relatively good looking and should be at least getting more responses. The problem is entirely your profile. Shorten it up, lighten it up, and see what happens. 1
sabre80 Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 PLEASE NO COMMENTS FROM GUYS, GUYS CAN'T TELL WHAT WOMEN ARE THINKING This is your damn problem. +1 When you are done learning how to be a nice guy best friend from all the ladies consider asking men how to attract ladies properly. Stop looking for female approval to validate your self worth. Though with that said the advice the ladies here gave you is quite sound.
bac Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 (edited) My response rate on OLD used to be about 1 email responded to for every 8 emails I sent out but my last 60 emails have only gotten one response. They all say they are looking for someone intelligent, well, if that's true, then why aren't they writing me. The second most important part of my being is that I am on feverish quest to literally know everything. I have ambitions to become a great poet/philosopher and I am study non-stop whatever I can from a huge array of subjects. I have an insatiable appetite for books and I need to find some who loves to read. I'm also very big into languages but not anymore. I once had a working knowledge of 11 languages (English, German, French, Arabic, Spanish, Italian, Old English, Ancient Greek, Latin, Hieroglyphs and Sanskrit) but I've probably forgotten Hieroglyphs and Sanskrit. I have no more ambitions to learn more languages because I want to focus on science and philosophy. I also do not fit the stereotype of the mad and crazy poet that can't live a stable life, I am very stable, don't get angry and am very well balanced and well adjusted. I also need to make perfectly clear that just because I love books I am not the stereotypical nerd. I am very smooth in conversation, have a great sense of humor and am charismatic. There is also the very sticky question of religion. About my job: I work night shift at a hotel. That gives me the opportunity to write my books on the job for four hours every night. I also have no debts, am very frugal and save 20% of the money I earn. It is an unusual profile. It means very risky to deal with. You say that you are intelligent. There are emotional and rational intelligence. To get married you should be emotionally intelligent. IMO it is the major problem in your profile. That means you should be emotionally intelligent enough to understand women's mind. You have read many books but you probably did not read much about emotional intelligence, NLP, behavioral science. It is not valuable for getting married that you are rationally intelligent unless it helps you to make good money. Women say that they want an intelligent man. But, their understanding of intelligence is totally different that your understanding is. Also, what is your job position and salary. They are the most important things for getting married. From what you wrote, you have a low-paid job and (maybe) self-educated. A husband should not be frugal. He should be very generous to his wife and kids. Who would want to get married a frugal guy with low income? Edited October 30, 2012 by bac
SoonMyFriend Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 I am new to online dating, but here are my thoughts (and yes I am female): Overall - too long and too serious. And as someone mentioned, there's a lot of negative "don't want this" "don't do that". You are often talking down to people in your profile and that's a huge turnoff. First paragraph: I think all you need to say is "I have a good head on my shoulders and I am looking for someone who shares my core values." You could always throw in "such as...." at the end of "core values" to give an example of what you highly value. You can also discuss details of said core values later once you start chatting. Once I read your opening paragraph I already feel smothered by perhaps what could be viewed as a judgemental attitude. Second paragraph: I find this to be a really condescending paragraph. I am an educated woman, but I feel like I just wouldn't meet your standards. You don't need to slag off people who exercise, and you certainly don't need to include phrases like "If you can't understand" because that reads to me like "If you don't understand in your tiny woman brain" or something to that effect. You don't need to talk down to people. I think you just need to write something like - I love books and have a vast thirst for knowledge. I am always reading and exploring new subjects. I'd love to find someone to help join me on my search. Now I know I am using simplistic language, and you are not in your profile, but honestly simple is key. KISS - Keep it simple stupid! Third paragraph: "I am very intense about intellectual humility so I am not your standard snob that thinks he's smarter than everyone." Really? Because you just spent the paragraph previous talking about how you can't be with someone who wants to go jogging instead of reading a book. You've already set a tone in your profile that you ARE a snob. Out of the third paragraph, I think the only part you need to keep is: "My real strength is poetry and literature but one of the best things I ever did was decide that there is more to life than poetry and started studying politics, and then moved on to science and philosophy. I am very enthusiastic about science and study it eagerly." The rest is just noise. You can talk about details later while chatting. Fourth paragraph: Just get rid of it. You can talk about religion later. Five paragraph: I find it helpful to include you work nights, but leave out the part about writing a book. To me, it makes you sound like you don't take your career seriously and for me personally, that's a turnoff. I also don't care that you are "frugal". That is probably the least sexy word you can use to say that you are financially responsible. It makes me think of my grandfather who never spends any money. -- Those are my thoughts, a bit brutal but I think you wanted honesty. 2
GirlontheLam Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 I got bored halfway through your profile. OK halfway through the 2nd paragraph. TMI. It was like a wall of text. And too many serious topics right off the bat. I would ignore your message too. Even if I thought you were attractive.
SJC2008 Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Your profile is too long, has TMI, snd you sound like a nun all due respect. When they read it and see how intellectual you look it turns them off. Also saying you work night shift at a hotel just sounds creepy, and I'm a guy! Shorten it up and try to sound more exciting. Don't be dishonest and paint a picture of someone you're not just try to spice it up a bit. Just some constructive criticism so don't take offense. TBS it's OLD so with the best profile your response rates are still going to be low. Women have more options than IRL and seem to ignore a guy they'd give their number to IRL because they are getting messages from better looking men. Then they go out with them, get pumped and dumped on the 3rd date and cry on the couch while eating bon bons wondering why she can't reign this hot guy in. Meanwhile the guy who is in her league and wants an r is ignored by her. As you can tell I'm very jaded from OLD but what I said is true for many women who do OLD.
yongyong Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 I understand people doesn't want to offend him. But the major problem is not your profile description. Is OLD about essay contest? copy some best well written profile, would it make a difference? I don't know what other pictures you have. but you really have a 'beta look' on your face. You could be really confident and have the ability to carry a great conversation....but who cares on OLD?
FitChick Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 The last paragraph is what is turning most women off. 1
NYC-BigKat Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 (edited) +1 When you are done learning how to be a nice guy best friend from all the ladies consider asking men how to attract ladies properly. Stop looking for female approval to validate your self worth. Though with that said the advice the ladies here gave you is quite sound. Yes yes op sound worse than me & I'm pretty bad but not bad like u . Op can be nice without talking so much about how smart u are sheesh! Maybe u should hang out with me & my UNCLE!! Edited October 30, 2012 by NYC-BigKat error
pteromom Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Ok. I have to say, I like your photo. Based on your photo, I would actually read your profile. And unlike others who have responded, I ENJOY a long, well-thought out profile. I can't stand profiles that are too short, or guys who are just trying to be funny and not saying anything about themselves. So I will provide some commentary that would let you know what I am thinking as I read your profile. Hi! Thank you for checking out my profile. First, let me say that I am passionate about morality, (prude? too religious?) living an ethical life, being decent and using my talents for their greatest good. (Me too.) Because of this I am very serious about falling in love with only one person for the rest of my life and being absolutely dedicated to them. (hmmm... is he desperate for ANYONE or actually looking for a match?) I have no interest in promiscuous, adulterous people. (Yikes! Judgy much? That is where I would quit reading, even if I wasn't "promiscuous". Sounds too much like you judge others for their choices, which is a big turn-off) I want to find someone who is as enthusiastic about commitment and is eager to remain half as devoted to me as I am willing to be devoted to them. (Sounds desperate and needy, like you would settle for someone who isn't an equal partner.) What I want most from my partner is that she be intelligent, moral and I have to admit looks matter. (OK.) The second most important part of my being is that I am on feverish quest to literally know everything. (Sounds far-fetched because you CAN'T know everything. Instead, how about saying you love reading and learning about new things and ideas.) I have ambitions to become a great poet/philosopher (sounds far-fetched again. How about "I enjoy poetry and philosophy" instead.) and I am study non-stop whatever I can from a huge array of subjects. I have an insatiable appetite for books and I need to find some who loves to read. (NEED doesn't sound great... how about "...and I would love someone to share them with.) If you cannot understand why it is that I enjoy knowledge so much then a relationship between us will be impossible. (Sounds preachy and dismissive.) I know there are a lot of women who are in to (Oops, Mr. Intellectual doesn't know into is one word.) sports and I can understand how exercising makes you healthy and makes you think better but I'm sorry if you're more in to exercising the body than exercising the mind, then we won't get along. (Sounds too negative. Rewrite to be positive... "I am looking for someone who loves to exercise her mind as well as her body.") Check out my blog to take a look at my writing. Google splendogloria and you should find it. (Good. Lets someone get more info if they wish.) I am very intense about intellectual humility so I am not your standard snob that thinks he's smarter than everyone. (This adds nothing, and I would remove the sentence. Sounds contradictory.) My real strength is poetry and literature but one of the best things I ever did was decide that there is more to life than poetry and started studying politics, and then moved on to science and philosophy. (THis is really one of the BEST THINGS he ever did? Wow.) I am very enthusiastic about science and study it eagerly. I'm also very big into languages but not anymore. I once had a working knowledge of 11 languages (English, German, French, Arabic, Spanish, Italian, Old English, Ancient Greek, Latin, Hieroglyphs and Sanskrit) but I've probably forgotten Hieroglyphs and Sanskrit. (Listing the languages seems ego-centric. I would leave them off - gives a woman a question to ask you later.) I have no more ambitions to learn more languages because I want to focus on science and philosophy. I also do not fit the stereotype of the mad and crazy poet that can't live a stable life, I am very stable, don't get angry and am very well balanced and well adjusted. (OK) I also need to make perfectly clear that just because I love books I am not the stereotypical nerd. (Sounds too defensive. Own who you are without having to label yourself.) I am very smooth in conversation, have a great sense of humor and am charismatic. (You cannot describe YOURSELF as charismatic. That's a word others would use. Sounds conceited.) There is also the very sticky question of religion. I am a strong believer in God but I do not believe in any of the established religions. I used to have a very strong personal relationship with God, and even wrote a prayer book but that kind of relationship is no longer possible. I definitely believe that the universe was created with a purpose in mind. I have no problems with going to church and I've gone to church many times without being a Christian and I feel just fine. I have no problems marrying a Christian but I can't marry a Christian who is obsessed with Jesus. (Instead of all this, how about "I am very spiritual but have some unique beliefs and thoughts about religion. I would love to share them with you and hear yours.") About my job: I work night shift at a hotel. That gives me the opportunity to write my books on the job for four hours every night. (Sounds like you are saying "I am NOT a hotel clerk. I am a WRITER!" Sounds too defensive. Instead, how about "I work at a hotel and am writing a book." - again gives her a question to ask you "What is your book about?) I also have no debts, am very frugal and save 20% of the money I earn. Do NOT say frugal, or give details about how much you save. Actually, you can take this whole sentence out. The other thing your profile is missing is FUN, as others have said. Other than reading and learning, what do you enjoy? Do you like to travel? Go out? Roller coasters? Yoga? Someone needs to get an idea of what life with you would be like, and based on your profile, I can only imagine us sitting around reading and talking philosophy. And while that is FUN, it's not enough to base a whole life together on. Also - more about her. What qualities do you admire in a woman? A beautiful smile? Confidence? Inner peace? You need for a woman to read what you are writing and say "Hey, he's looking for ME!" 1
Silly_Girl Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 It's too big an 'advert' in my view, too long and that puts folk off, and too detailed. I like profiles to be a taster... So you think 'I'd like to get to know that person better', not 'that's what they're like and I'm not a perfect fit so I'll not bother'. I bet there are loads of ways you and I could click, for example, but I feel I know a heck of a lot about you already and don't feel a synergy, so I wouldn't contact you. Hope that makes sense! It's just the marketing, you seem like a great guy.
Under The Radar Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 i am new to online dating, but here are my thoughts (and yes i am female): overall - too long and too serious. And as someone mentioned, there's a lot of negative "don't want this" "don't do that". You are often talking down to people in your profile and that's a huge turnoff. first paragraph: I think all you need to say is "i have a good head on my shoulders and i am looking for someone who shares my core values." you could always throw in "such as...." at the end of "core values" to give an example of what you highly value. You can also discuss details of said core values later once you start chatting. Once i read your opening paragraph i already feel smothered by perhaps what could be viewed as a judgemental attitude. second paragraph: I find this to be a really condescending paragraph. I am an educated woman, but i feel like i just wouldn't meet your standards. You don't need to slag off people who exercise, and you certainly don't need to include phrases like "if you can't understand" because that reads to me like "if you don't understand in your tiny woman brain" or something to that effect. You don't need to talk down to people. I think you just need to write something like - i love books and have a vast thirst for knowledge. I am always reading and exploring new subjects. I'd love to find someone to help join me on my search. Now i know i am using simplistic language, and you are not in your profile, but honestly simple is key. Kiss - keep it simple stupid! third paragraph: "i am very intense about intellectual humility so i am not your standard snob that thinks he's smarter than everyone." really? Because you just spent the paragraph previous talking about how you can't be with someone who wants to go jogging instead of reading a book. You've already set a tone in your profile that you are a snob. Out of the third paragraph, i think the only part you need to keep is: "my real strength is poetry and literature but one of the best things i ever did was decide that there is more to life than poetry and started studying politics, and then moved on to science and philosophy. I am very enthusiastic about science and study it eagerly." the rest is just noise. You can talk about details later while chatting. fourth paragraph: Just get rid of it. You can talk about religion later. five paragraph: I find it helpful to include you work nights, but leave out the part about writing a book. To me, it makes you sound like you don't take your career seriously and for me personally, that's a turnoff. I also don't care that you are "frugal". That is probably the least sexy word you can use to say that you are financially responsible. It makes me think of my grandfather who never spends any money. -- those are my thoughts, a bit brutal but i think you wanted honesty. ^^^^^^^^^^ this ^^^^^^^^^^
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