Brandonw013 Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 (edited) I really need help. I get jealous really fast. I have been dating this girl for two and a half years. I really trust her but she is talking about taking a break because of my jealousy. I get jealous when she hangs with her friends and doesn't text me or when she's with her family. It use to not be like this. She use to text me 24/7. I know she is not cheating on me and when I ask her if she's gonna leave me or wants to leave she tells me no. I really don't wanna be with out this girl. She is my world and I really can't believe I let my jealousy get in the way of us. I need help getting over this jealousy. Someone please give me some advice. My relationship is on the line with this one please help me :'( Edited October 29, 2012 by Brandonw013 Misspelled word
Minka333 Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 If you really trust her then you won't feel an unhealthy dose of jealousy. It will only poison your mind with endless paranoia.* If you are sure and have proof that she is cheating then you know the right thing to do..walk away before she walks all over you.
Author Brandonw013 Posted October 29, 2012 Author Posted October 29, 2012 But how do I quit being jealous of stupid things? She isn't cheating. I just need to know how to quit being jealous over her friends and family and quit being mad about it.
Minka333 Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 You have to learn to trust her. Do not entertain any scenarios of her flirting or wanting another guy. She is with you because she wants you. She is with you because she chooses to. She is with you because she loves you. Do not choke her freedom to spend time with her friends and family. Let her grow on her own even when you're not together. Do not let your insecurity and fears eat you up inside. Replace your negative thoughts by thinking about the moments when she made you feel special. As long as she assures you and shows her devotion then you have nothing to worry about.
sweetkiwi Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 that comes with confidence,experience, and trust. You have to ask yourself why you would be jealous of her friends and family. They're not her lovers. She is with you. Romantically. Unless you get a hold of your jealousy she will be gone forever. Jealous boyfriends are scary as hell. They make for violent boyfriends. Not fun. I don't think you want to be the obsessive oppressive type of guy right? Figure out why you're jealous. Then work on it. And be honest. With yourself and her.
Author Brandonw013 Posted October 29, 2012 Author Posted October 29, 2012 Ok thanks I hope I have enough time for her to forgive me
nofool4u Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 I really need help. I get jealous really fast. I have been dating this girl for two and a half years. I really trust her but she is talking about taking a break because of my jealousy. I get jealous when she hangs with her friends and doesn't text me or when she's with her family. It use to not be like this. She use to text me 24/7. I know she is not cheating on me and when I ask her if she's gonna leave me or wants to leave she tells me no. I really don't wanna be with out this girl. She is my world and I really can't believe I let my jealousy get in the way of us. I need help getting over this jealousy. Someone please give me some advice. My relationship is on the line with this one please help me :'( I'd just let her be her. I think a woman really appreciates a guy that she doesn't have to worry about getting mad if she hangs with her friends. If she sees you are caring and not worried, if she is worth a damn, she'll make sure she gives you no reason to worry. And if it ends up she takes advantage of her freedom with her friends and ends up cheating or disrespecting you, THEN just dump her and move on to better ladies. Let her have time with her friends, don't let it bother you. Go out with the guys. And if she ends up doing things like coming home when the sun comes up and acting shifty, just leave her in the dust. You can trust her until she gives you a reason to not.
KathyM Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 I think you know your jealousy is over the top, and when you are jealous of her spending time with her family or friends, then that's a red flag for her that would be a dealbreaker for most relationships. People with extreme jealousy often have fear of abandonment or issues from their childhood that caused them to have trust issues. I suggest you see a counselor to find out why you are having these feelings and to work on them, or this attitude will damage/ruin your relationship.
skywriter Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 brandon, if you really want to stop being jealous, you have to do this for you and not for your girlfriend. You have to learn rational thinking skills. Stopping the urge within you to even go there. You talk to yourself in your head, when you feel yourself becoming jealous. It's a control technique. It will help you to be a more mature individual. If you think about it, you really don't want to control her, or drive her away, so even if she does feel she wants to break it off with you. Use that opportunity to learn this skill of rational thinking. It will give you peace of mind in the future.
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