GirlontheLam Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 To be honest, I find class differences to be much harder to bridge than "race/ethnicity" differences.
Feelin Frisky Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 I went with one black girl for 5 years. We wound up living together. This was in NYC and Brooklyn in the 1980's. Most of the time it was OK but we did have to suffer some hurtful racism on several occasions--from mostly whites but some blacks. Blacks would just make rude comments or suck their teeth in that way to implies disapproval. The white through a rock through my landlord's window to express their disapproval of a mixed could moving in. On another occasion I left my girl out in the car while I went up to a friend's apartment to get weed. When I came down she was crying--saying a bunch of roughnecks surrounded the car and called her racial epithets. It ruined the mood of the night. I thought NYC would be pretty casual about it but it wasn't then. I live in Virginia now near a military base and it is not unusual at all to see mixed couples with kids. Maybe NY is better now too--30 years later. I know that where I used to live is going through radical transformation and am jealous no to be back there to see it. 1
Author Mrlonelyone Posted October 30, 2012 Author Posted October 30, 2012 Feelin Frisky I get what you are saying. Right now people may be far less overt about it, like we are with racism.
aj22one Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Is (or was) anyone here part of an interracial couple? In particular how uncomfortable were people with seeing you two in public displaying affection? haha well I'm white and I'm married to a Pakistani woman. I've only ever dated middle eastern and Indian women haha. I don't know why. I'm not attracted to white women at all. I live near DC nobody I know has any problem with it. Some people are curious when they find out she's Muslim and I'm not. Which is probably a bigger deal than her being South Asian haha. I dated a girl from the UAE once who was so self conscious she never wanted to be seen in any kind of pda, didn't even want me to drop her off or pick her up at her house because "Arab people would talk". haha I dunno, it got annoying real quick.
Mme. Chaucer Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 I personally am completely comfortable with interracial dating, marriage, multi-racial families, etc. My first serious relationship was with a black man (I'm white). I'm also comfortable with people who are attracted to, or socially / culturally more in tune with pairing with others of their own ethnic background. I don't think it's necessarily wrong or "racist" if a person wants to date within their own race. Of course, it CAN be racist, but not necessarily. 1
BetheButterfly Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 I personally am completely comfortable with interracial dating, marriage, multi-racial families, etc. My first serious relationship was with a black man (I'm white). I'm also comfortable with people who are attracted to, or socially / culturally more in tune with pairing with others of their own ethnic background. I don't think it's necessarily wrong or "racist" if a person wants to date within their own race. Of course, it CAN be racist, but not necessarily. Agreed. I LOVE the quote, "There's only one race: the human race." However, the dictionary does define race to be the following: "noun 1. a group of persons related by common descent or heredity." Race | Define Race at Dictionary.com However, in terms of the context of this thread, I love a wonderful man who is not of the same ethnicity as me. My sisters are married (the youngest being engaged) to men of the same ethnicity as we are. My sisters are not racists... they just fell in love with men who happen to be of the same "race"/ethnicity. Either way works. I don't care what others think about my choice, except for my parents and family, including my sisters!!! I am so glad they love and adore my hubby!!!
Got it Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 I am in an interracial relationship. I think it adds "flavor". I have not had any issues resulting from it. I don't think people in my area even seem to notice.
Necris Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Personally I'm completely comfortable with interracial dating, I'm attracted to all races of women and limiting myself based on race just seems silly. But I do realize that interracial dating is actually rare, and many people are not comfortable with or just aren't attracted to people outside their race. I think one of the reasons why I'm having such difficulty getting a girlfriend is probably due to my social circle (cold approaches rarely yield results for anyone, unless you are incredibly good-looking, or charismatic), I'm black but my social circle is mostly white and other races but very few other black people who aren't family with really no black women. So I'm sort of limited here as women of other races are far more likely to be attracted to members of their own race already and then they'd be a bit apprehensive to dating members of other races. Then again its probably just me as black women aren't attracted to me as well, I'm just too nerdy I guess.
taya Posted November 1, 2012 Posted November 1, 2012 I went with one black girl for 5 years. We wound up living together. This was in NYC and Brooklyn in the 1980's. Most of the time it was OK but we did have to suffer some hurtful racism on several occasions--from mostly whites but some blacks. Blacks would just make rude comments or suck their teeth in that way to implies disapproval. The white through a rock through my landlord's window to express their disapproval of a mixed could moving in. On another occasion I left my girl out in the car while I went up to a friend's apartment to get weed. When I came down she was crying--saying a bunch of roughnecks surrounded the car and called her racial epithets. It ruined the mood of the night. I thought NYC would be pretty casual about it but it wasn't then. I live in Virginia now near a military base and it is not unusual at all to see mixed couples with kids. Maybe NY is better now too--30 years later. I know that where I used to live is going through radical transformation and am jealous no to be back there to see it. aww am so sorry that happen to you guys
Quiet Storm Posted November 1, 2012 Posted November 1, 2012 My husband is black. We have been together since 1991, high school sweethearts. Now we have three kids, ranging from 8-16. We live in Maryland, in a liberal and diverse area, so we have not experienced much outward racism here at home. We occasionally get stares because we are affectionate with each other. When we were younger, we'd mess with people and really give 'em something to stare at, LOL. Once when we were young, we drove to Kings Dominion in VA. On the way back, we were stopped by the state police for going a few miles over the speed limit. The cop kept asking me "Are you sure you're alright, miss?". He thought I was being kidnapped or something. Then he he asked to search our car and said something about I-95 being a common drug route. We said "What??? Don't you need a warrant?". He said he would get one from a judge but we would have to wait for hours on the side of the road while they got one. We had nothing to hide & wanted to get home, so we just let him search our stuff. I know if I had been with a white guy that day, we would not have gone through that. As for my kids, they have experienced more prejudice for being atheists than for being mixed.
yamanbt Posted November 5, 2012 Posted November 5, 2012 I've been with white women before, and my gf is biracial. Needless to say, I'm fine with it. lol.
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