jcrew11 Posted October 27, 2012 Posted October 27, 2012 I was thinking about how a lot of Men are clueless about dating, taking the lead in dating, and Romance. Are Men just not being taught how to successfully attract and keep a woman? Or do women have unrealistic expectations of dating and romance based on Romantic Movies? Is it up to a guy's Mother to tell him how to attract Women and what Women want? Or is there too much of a generational gap and uncomfortableness in discussing dating with your Mom? Do you discuss dating problems and get advice from your Mom or Dad? Has it ever worked?
mammasita Posted October 27, 2012 Posted October 27, 2012 I hope my son listens to me. Right now I just embarrass him lol (he's 11) 1
xdahliax Posted October 27, 2012 Posted October 27, 2012 I ask my mom for dating tips sometimes, but she always answers that I'm the most beautiful girl in the world. I guess it doesn't really help me out much, but it definitely boosts morale
somedude81 Posted October 27, 2012 Posted October 27, 2012 My parents don't know crap about dating. My dad hasn't helped me at all even though he did OK with women. Honestly, he's never even talked to me about dating or women at all. My mom doesn't know anything about how dating or relationships work. Just respect women, be a gentleman and all that BS that doesn't mean sh*t.
KathyM Posted October 27, 2012 Posted October 27, 2012 Mothers are often full of good advice. They have life experience, and have learned a lot along the way, hopefully. If your mother has a successful life, successful relationships, etc., she probably knows a thing or two and would be a good source to ask about a variety of topics. And she has your best interests at heart. As a woman who works in the counseling field helping others to sort out their relationships/dating woes, etc., and has her own life and relationships in order, I think my sons get some pretty solid advice from me, but whether they will listen is another thing. I think some of it has sunk in though.
january2011 Posted October 27, 2012 Posted October 27, 2012 I talk to my mum about relationships and her experiences but I would never take any advice literally. She is from a completely different generation. The generation of one man for life and no sex before marriage. Some of views tend towards misandry. She has never pushed the idea of finding "a good man" to me or my siblings. Rather it's about going for a man who doesn't drink, smoke or gamble, has a good job and makes good money. Then make sure he doesn't use you then dump you. I don't have such a pessimistic view of relationships or men. Regarding dating advice, she.has.no.idea. As to men asking their mothers for dating/romance tips - depends on the son, depends on the mom and depends on their relationship. If they are both rational and sane adults who are good and loving people, perhaps. But her idea of romance may not transfer across generations and/or align with those of the women her son is attracted to.
xdahliax Posted October 27, 2012 Posted October 27, 2012 (edited) Rather it's about going for a man who doesn't drink, smoke or gamble, has a good job and makes good money. Then make sure he doesn't use you then dump you. I don't have such a pessimistic view of relationships or men. My grandmother is like this. She doesn't understand romance at all. It's all about practicality. I avoid speaking to my grandmother about my dating life, because she just pushes me onto every guy she sees. This even happens when the guy is somewhat successful but not at all into me. All she needs is something to work with, like a smile, and she's arranging a marriage. Edited October 27, 2012 by xdahliax 1
Pyro Posted October 27, 2012 Posted October 27, 2012 I wouldn't ask neither of my parents. We are in a whole new world of dating compared to how things were 15 years ago. Everything that I learned about dating came from: -this place -what I witnessed first hand from other people while out -from trial and error
ThaWholigan Posted October 27, 2012 Posted October 27, 2012 I ask my mum about certain things - other things I speculate she is clueless about so I ask my brothers instead. I have my PUA books, but I don't rely on them as the rule. My mum is good when it comes to sizing up women, and how to be vigilant when they take the piss. But so are my brothers .
phineas Posted October 27, 2012 Posted October 27, 2012 My mom is 69 & my dad 70 & been married for like forever. They are the last people who should be giving advice on relationships since their both mean to each other & waiting for the other to crap out. LOL! However, I didn't listen to mom with the ex-wife. So if she don't like the next one, then she's just for fun.
suladas Posted October 27, 2012 Posted October 27, 2012 (edited) Nothing to specific. Just saying to find someone who has a good head on their shoulders, wants to work and has good values. Good advice though to me and my brother like "Don't do something stupid and get her pregnant" She wasn't a big fan when she heard my ex was 12 years older then me and had kids though. But basically just said be careful. She was actually sad for me when we broke up though, kinda seemed like she became ok with it. I'd never talk to her anymore then that about relationships. When I was with my ex she was asking if we had gotten "romantically involved" and I wanted to die, talking to my mom about that Edited October 27, 2012 by suladas
Imajerk17 Posted October 27, 2012 Posted October 27, 2012 (edited) My GRANDMOTHER gave me some great advice (although she has passed on ). She had a Nice Guy boyfriend whom she tooled when she was in high school, she was head-over-heels for jerks, she multi-dated (for the time that was extremely rare). And then she fell for my Good Guy grandfather, and had an awesome marriage all the way to the time he passed. Most importantly though, she was also extremely self-aware. She could articulate what attracted her to the jerks. So yeah, she gave me some great advice. Edited October 27, 2012 by Imajerk17
Necromancer Posted October 28, 2012 Posted October 28, 2012 I was thinking about how a lot of Men are clueless about dating, taking the lead in dating, and Romance. Are Men just not being taught how to successfully attract and keep a woman? Or do women have unrealistic expectations of dating and romance based on Romantic Movies? Is it up to a guy's Mother to tell him how to attract Women and what Women want? Or is there too much of a generational gap and uncomfortableness in discussing dating with your Mom? Do you discuss dating problems and get advice from your Mom or Dad? Has it ever worked? No, i am not going to ask my parents... But i will ask my friends if i need to. To attract women you have to be good looking.... that can´t be taught since it´s your face. Really what do women have to do since men have to be Prince charming alpha king player male of the year to proof his worth?.
Author jcrew11 Posted October 28, 2012 Author Posted October 28, 2012 No, i am not going to ask my parents... But i will ask my friends if i need to. To attract women you have to be good looking.... that can´t be taught since it´s your face. Really what do women have to do since men have to be Prince charming alpha king player male of the year to proof his worth?. Men can improve their looks. Have you ever tried hair gel?
NoMoreJerks Posted October 28, 2012 Posted October 28, 2012 I am not sure if that's gonna help a lot. But it would be nice to know what percentage of men (and how old they are) actually do talk to their moms about their dating/relationship issues and ask for advice. I've always wondered if my ex (who was close to his parents, especially his mom) ever asked her for advice. Hm. That said, I don't know if parents' advice is necessarily going to be relevant. I think that they might offer good insights as to what sorts of behaviour is douchebaggy, or whatever, but in terms of how to behave with / around a gf/someone you are interested in, etc, i don't think their own experiences are that relevant, considering how much things have changed.. I am a woman, and have asked my sister for advice, and heck, even my sister, who is only 3 years older than me, has provided rather crappy advice -- very conservative/traditional, just like my parents. At some point she even claimed she did not have sex with her now-husband until she got married. I don't know if I buy that, or if she is now trying to sugar-coat her own "naughty" behaviour in front of family members..
Inflikted Posted October 28, 2012 Posted October 28, 2012 I wouldn't say I've asked my mom for advice, but I have told her about the grand total of two girls I had fallen for, for the simple fact that I have no one else to talk to and divulge this info to, and it makes me feel a bit better to get it out there. I don't know that she really helps, though. All she really does is encourage me not to give up with the girl, even if the situation is unfavorable. For instance, I'm still hung up over a girl I'm friends with that I asked out recently and got turned down by, yet my mom keeps insisting that things could change, and that it will work out. I know things probably won't change and that I'll probably never have anything with this girl, and whenever my mom brings it up, we always sort of get into little arguments, with her basically telling me not to give up on the girl, and me trying to be realistic and saying it's not going to happen. @_@
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