How to deal

[Starman8]

Long story short, a girl I met earlier this year and saw casually through volunteer work is back in town (she's from abroad and here about 9 months at a time). We always flirted, had good chemistry, and agreed to keep in touch when she left in May. It was made clear our relationship would continue outside of the volunteer scene.

 

When she got back in town she got in touch with me right away. It was by text and she suggested we get together. I responded and she didn't reply. I tried calling her after a few days later and she didn't answer. Finally a few days later she texted me and we ended up hanging out last weekend.

 

We had a really awesome time together and I felt that we were really both into each other. We didn't kiss, but I feel confident enough to make a move on the next outing. We texted a few times this week and there seemed to be mutual interest. However I texted her to set up something this weekend last night and she is not replying again.

 

Any thoughts on how to deal with someone who does this? I really like her, but I don't like this appear/disappear behavior. I realize she is busy working on a PHD, but I know she is social too.

 

Perhaps I am expecting too much too soon? I just don't want this pattern to continue.

 

Just a side note, we are in our early 30's/late 20's.

[River Rain]

When you text a person, you have to assume they've read it pretty much immediately if they're not sleeping or working. If too much time goes by, you have to accept that they made a choice not to reply.

 

I personally don't get it. It takes less than a minute to reply. I wouldn't put up with it, but that's my experience talking.

[Starman8]

I have plenty of friends that don't respond to texts immediately and I get that everyone is different in terms of how they perceive texting etiquette.

 

I am just wondering if this needs to be dealt with at this point with this person and how specifically it should be addressed.