dealing with feelings for another man

[njturnpike]

I've been married for 5 years. Overall our marriage is great, though we're both pretty distracted with our hectic lives - graduate school, jobs, and our awesome 11 month old son. Even though stress is high and time for us is hard to come by, we're very much in love and 100% committed to our marriage. Here's the problem. I've got it bad for one of my professors who is only a few years older than me. He is also married, and happy in his marriage. Though we've never (and would never) discussed this, I get a strong impression that he's attracted to me too. Our relationship is completely appropriate with professional boundaries. I see him twice a week for class and we correspond a little more than that because he is somewhat of a mentor to me. Our professional relationship is valuable to me in an academic sense and in a career sense. I just want this horrible crush to go away! I'm not one that thinks that being married means you can't be attracted to anyone else and I think professional platonic relationships are great, but I find myself thinking about this man A LOT. I feel devastated every week when class ends knowing that I have to wait 5 days to see him again. I thought I was immune to these kinds of feelings because I've got such a solid marital relationship, but I guess not. Can I get some thoughts and advice here?

[Cb3657]

Find a new mentor immediately, half of the battle in being a faithfull person is not putting yourself in positions were temptations can be acted apon. Everyone runs into times were cheating is possible, if you are self aware and not ruled by your baser instincts you need to get out of the way of this.

Remember what the consequences are if you continue down your path, you will likely never forgive yourself for the destruction this can reign down on your growing family. Broken home, damaged children, all for a little loving you arent actually missing in your current marriage.

[threebyfate]

There are two subforums on LS you should read. One is the OW/OM, the other is the Infidelity one. Don't look away until you've read at least 30 of the largest threads in both subforums.

 

If these threads don't cure your crush, you might end up becoming one of the posters. Good luck!

[kamani]

How long does your course last?

 

I think it's better to leave the class other than risking your family life.

 

Find someway out just now. The more you interact with him, no matter professional or not, the more would be the feelings. Later it would become more difficult, even painful.