Jump to content

I don't understand why I still love her


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

My thread explaining most of it: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/second-chances/350736-my-situation

 

She acted really immaturely to finish the relationship and she's still in that relationship and I set up NC (didn't tell her, I assumed it) and its been 2 weeks since I initiated NC and a month and a bit since the breakup.

 

I just keep missing and loving her more, and despite everything she did to me and the way she confused me by acting like we were a couple the last time we met etc. All my friends say I need to forget her and move on, which I am trying to but my feelings for her just keep getting stronger and I can't get her out of my head. I've been trying to keep busy, I've been exercising and making new friends etc etc.

 

It seems that time isn't healing, just making me feel worse. Any tips?

Posted

You're doing all the right things, so pat yourself on the back. NC, exercising, keeping busy, getting out there meeting new people AND recognizing the awful way she treated you at the end.

 

Patience and time...you are doing everything right, well done. Baby steps and one day you won't feel so bad and the next you'll feel better...patience.

  • Author
Posted
You're doing all the right things, so pat yourself on the back. NC, exercising, keeping busy, getting out there meeting new people AND recognizing the awful way she treated you at the end.

 

Patience and time...you are doing everything right, well done. Baby steps and one day you won't feel so bad and the next you'll feel better...patience.

 

Thanks, its just confusing that I still love and care for her.

  • Author
Posted

I definately still respect her, I want to show her affection, I admire her and do desire her to be mine. Got no idea whether its mutual as she is still in that new relationship (if it was I guess she would have broke it off with him and chased after me,) I guess when the last time I met up with her and she acted like we were a couple just confused my emotions completely.

Posted
I definately still respect her, I want to show her affection, I admire her and do desire her to be mine. Got no idea whether its mutual as she is still in that new relationship (if it was I guess she would have broke it off with him and chased after me,) I guess when the last time I met up with her and she acted like we were a couple just confused my emotions completely.

 

man you crazy lol haha

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
man you crazy lol haha

 

Basically :laugh:

Posted
Basically :laugh:

 

sorry i dident mean it bad but go out there and pick up a hottie hahaha and move on from this chick lol dident she moved on??? so many hot woman waiting for ya lol;)

  • Author
Posted
sorry i dident mean it bad but go out there and pick up a hottie hahaha and move on from this chick lol dident she moved on??? so many hot woman waiting for ya lol;)

 

I didn't take offence :p. And yeah that's the plan, just gotta get rid of these feelings first. I suppose I'm just thinking about everything, if she tries crawling back or something like that!

Posted
I didn't take offence :p. And yeah that's the plan, just gotta get rid of these feelings first. I suppose I'm just thinking about everything, if she tries crawling back or something like that!

 

so would you take her back? wasent she the one that leave yoou?? and thats how to get rid of the feelings lol by moving on getting some on eles but i get you . you can wait a little and try to fixs your self beacuse it would be bad to just jump back into something eles so quick you dont want just a rebound ..but all am saying just dont sit and let this girl be the center of your world stressing you out making you lose sleep.... beacuse think about it is she doing all that over you??? no she is not

  • Author
Posted
so would you take her back? wasent she the one that leave yoou?? and thats how to get rid of the feelings lol by moving on getting some on eles but i get you . you can wait a little and try to fixs your self beacuse it would be bad to just jump back into something eles so quick you dont want just a rebound ..but all am saying just dont sit and let this girl be the center of your world stressing you out making you lose sleep.... beacuse think about it is she doing all that over you??? no she is not

 

To be honest, I would and that's the most confusing thing, she left me, treated me badly and yet I'd have her back. And to be honest, I think moving on would be the best cure as another girl would take my mind off my ex. I wouldn't go for a relationship, just no strings attached stuff, I'd make it clear from the start haha :p

 

And yeah you're right completely!

Posted
To be honest, I would and that's the most confusing thing, she left me, treated me badly and yet I'd have her back. And to be honest, I think moving on would be the best cure as another girl would take my mind off my ex. I wouldn't go for a relationship, just no strings attached stuff, I'd make it clear from the start haha :p

 

And yeah you're right completely!

 

 

yeah but i undersatnd tho how you feel the last guy i talk to he dident treated me bad or nothing but it dident work out and omg i have to fight my self everday to move on even today i felt like texting him so so bad but i know i should not and it hurts not talking or seeing the person anymore ..but thats life right we just have to learn to move on keeping our self respect i have lost mine a few time over a guy but that will never happen again as a woman you cant believe how low that made me felt:o

  • Author
Posted
I just tried to read your original post and from what I could gather, what you have here is a crush. You really don't know this girl from the sound of things. You're hanging on because she stirred something in you, not because you share the things I mentioned above. Infatuations or crushes aren't about love at all. They're about idealization. How long were you really with this person?

 

It was the first relationship for both of us, I hadn't had "proper" crushes (the standard celebrity ones I had) or anything until she came along and she never had the chance until I appeared. I never really got attached and was more concerned about life! We did start going out pretty quickly (about a week since we met,) we just got on like a house on fire, our personalities just clicked. The relationship lasted two and a half months and we saw each other practically every day, I felt like I did know her. I suppose it was first love syndrome but it definitely didn't feel like it was lust, we did care for each other etc. When she left me, I felt heartbreak that's for sure, I had never felt so awful in my life.

 

yeah but i undersatnd tho how you feel the last guy i talk to he dident treated me bad or nothing but it dident work out and omg i have to fight my self everday to move on even today i felt like texting him so so bad but i know i should not and it hurts not talking or seeing the person anymore ..but thats life right we just have to learn to move on keeping our self respect i have lost mine a few time over a guy but that will never happen again as a woman you cant believe how low that made me felt:o

 

Hope it goes well, I know the feeling!

Posted
It was the first relationship for both of us, I hadn't had "proper" crushes (the standard celebrity ones I had) or anything until she came along and she never had the chance until I appeared. I never really got attached and was more concerned about life! We did start going out pretty quickly (about a week since we met,) we just got on like a house on fire, our personalities just clicked. The relationship lasted two and a half months and we saw each other practically every day, I felt like I did know her. I suppose it was first love syndrome but it definitely didn't feel like it was lust, we did care for each other etc. When she left me, I felt heartbreak that's for sure, I had never felt so awful in my life.

 

 

 

Hope it goes well, I know the feeling!

 

 

lol but the relationship was like 2 years ago lol i was just telling you about loseing sef respect what it can do ..to not lose it with this girl lol

  • Author
Posted
Well hang in there, that's all you can do. These things are like food poisoning. They hit hard and fast and leave you with a messed up gut for weeks afterward. Eventually it will pass and another girl will come along and make you sick to your stomach all over again. Trust me. ;)

 

Thanks, I'm waiting for the moment when I can realise its all over! :)

 

lol but the relationship was like 2 years ago lol i was just telling you about loseing sef respect what it can do ..to not lose it with this girl lol

 

I'll keep it in mind, I'll make sure I don't lose my self respect :).

  • Like 1
Posted
Thanks, I'm waiting for the moment when I can realise its all over! :)

 

 

 

I'll keep it in mind, I'll make sure I don't lose my self respect :).

 

lol ok so whats new did she call you?

  • Author
Posted
lol ok so whats new did she call you?

 

Nope, no contact from her for over 2 weeks now. She'll probably try get into contact and crawl back when she gets stabbed in the back by her current boyfriend (who she left me for,) who has a history of backstabbing and manipulation (seen him manipulate and backstab others, including me when he persuaded my ex to leave me for him.) Made her fully aware of it, so have our mutual friends so if she would rather be manipulated and backstabbed rather then have someone who would try make her feel special and protect her, its her loss despite what I feel.

Posted
Nope, no contact from her for over 2 weeks now. She'll probably try get into contact and crawl back when she gets stabbed in the back by her current boyfriend (who she left me for,) who has a history of backstabbing and manipulation (seen him manipulate and backstab others, including me when he persuaded my ex to leave me for him.) Made her fully aware of it, so have our mutual friends so if she would rather be manipulated and backstabbed rather then have someone who would try make her feel special and protect her, its her loss despite what I feel.

 

 

yeah so true and plz tell me you wouldent take her back?

Posted
Nope, no contact from her for over 2 weeks now. She'll probably try get into contact and crawl back when she gets stabbed in the back by her current boyfriend (who she left me for,) who has a history of backstabbing and manipulation (seen him manipulate and backstab others, including me when he persuaded my ex to leave me for him.) Made her fully aware of it, so have our mutual friends so if she would rather be manipulated and backstabbed rather then have someone who would try make her feel special and protect her, its her loss despite what I feel.

 

 

aww you live in the uk i live in USA lol i love the british accent tho lol

  • Author
Posted
yeah so true and plz tell me you wouldent take her back?

 

I probably wouldn't, but if she was sincere enough, admitted she made a mistake and proved (ie actions) that she was prepared to earn my trust back then I would. That's what confuses me because I've never given second chances to people and yet I'm prepared to for her :S

 

aww you live in the uk i live in USA lol i love the british accent tho lol

 

Been to Florida, and everytime I was there someone commented on my british accent haha! :p

Posted
I probably wouldn't, but if she was sincere enough, admitted she made a mistake and proved (ie actions) that she was prepared to earn my trust back then I would. That's what confuses me because I've never given second chances to people and yet I'm prepared to for her :S

 

 

 

Been to Florida, and everytime I was there someone commented on my british accent haha! :p

 

 

lol and wow you would take her back even tho she left you for another guy wow thats crazy ......

 

and i cant with to come to england lol

Posted

lol i dident tell you i do live in florida lol

  • Author
Posted
lol and wow you would take her back even tho she left you for another guy wow thats crazy ......

 

and i cant with to come to england lol

 

Yeah basically, she hasn't tried so far, so hoping I'd get over it before she tries!

  • Author
Posted

Thought I'd stick to one thread ather then making multiple threads. Its funny how time changes how you look on things.

 

I had a hard time this week as she wouldn't leave my mind, had ear infections so chose not to exercise until my ears were better but got fed up as I hit a low tonight so I went for a long run.

 

I realised that my ex chose to leave, I did nothing wrong, why should I feel bad about something that isn't really my problem?! Plus she downgraded (she left me for my so called friend who is a fat IT technician [i could do what he does easily] whos talents are a mechanical mind and manipulation/backstabbing others over me whos muscular, do judo/kickboxing, race in motorsport and studying Maths at Uni. So at the end of the day she made a big mistake and its her loss, I can do far better then her, so if she comes crawling back, I'm not taking her back.

  • Like 1
Posted
Thought I'd stick to one thread ather then making multiple threads. Its funny how time changes how you look on things.

 

I had a hard time this week as she wouldn't leave my mind, had ear infections so chose not to exercise until my ears were better but got fed up as I hit a low tonight so I went for a long run.

 

I realised that my ex chose to leave, I did nothing wrong, why should I feel bad about something that isn't really my problem?! Plus she downgraded (she left me for my so called friend who is a fat IT technician [i could do what he does easily] whos talents are a mechanical mind and manipulation/backstabbing others over me whos muscular, do judo/kickboxing, race in motorsport and studying Maths at Uni. So at the end of the day she made a big mistake and its her loss, I can do far better then her, so if she comes crawling back, I'm not taking her back.

 

 

aww you finaly wake up man good yeah she left it hurts i know but you have to let her go we can never force someone to be with us by the end of the day its their choice ,, guess what she made hers

×
×
  • Create New...