How to recover from coming on too strong?

[lls7297]

I have been on 4 dates with this girl [17]. I am 1st year university and she is in highschool.

First 3 dates went great, 4th date was sort of scattered and we watched a movie that I recommended but she didn't enjoy. A couple of make out sessions on 4th date if that makes any difference.

 

Driving her home after 4th date I asked her if she wanted to do some the following week and she said yes, she would text me if she was free.

 

I sent her a text a couple days later with a joke about something that happened on the date and she replied "lol!

8 days after that I hadnt heard from her, so I texted her "How's it going"

 

"pretty good"

 

Nothing for 3 days, so i text asking if she wanted to do something that weekend and she said she was sick. I asked about the following week and she said she would be busy with school / work.

 

At this point i was frustrated asking if I should take a hint and move on. Her: "Wtf, i just busy right now"

Then basically repeat that exact series of events 2 1/2 weeks later, but with her giving me a very long text about how busy she is and that I should chill out.

 

Me: "Sorry I've been under a lot of stress lately, if you're busy I'll hold off for a while"

no response.

 

I'm never this clingy, and I don't know why I pushed so hard, but I'm pretty sure I ruined it. I plan on just leaving her alone for a while.

 

Is there anything I can do to fix this? How long should I wait to text her again, 3 weeks?

Edited October 26, 2012 by lls7297

[Rinaaa]

Girls are different and handle situations differently and I don't personally know her so I don't know if she's into you or not. Maybe she is, but she really is that busy. However, I and no one I've ever known has ever been too busy to make time for someone we're really into. I hate when people use the word "busy" because it really is a load of crap. How busy can someone truly be? Even Barack Obama has said that he has been consistent with having dinner with his family on a regular basis and he's the President, life doesn't get busier than his. If Barack Obama can make time for his family, we can all set aside time for someone we'd like to see. I think sometimes people, men and women alike, string someone along and make excuses for why they can't see them, hoping they'll get a clue, b/c it's easier to do that than to just be honest, upfront, and risk hurting someone's feelings. I would lay low for a while and not jump to conclusions or overreact because maybe that's what scared her off; if she's the one who's super busy then maybe wait to see if she contacts you when she's more available. You could wait a couple of weeks and try again, but if she's still making excuses then you're wasting your time and she's probably not all that into you. Sorry.

[lls7297]

thanks for the response.

 

Let's say she actually was busy enough that she couldn't make time for me, bt still wanted too. Now that I texted her and possibly scared her off is there anything I can do other than wait a few weeks?

[lls7297]

 

CALL THE F'in GIRL.

 

.

 

Each time I called she told me to text her because she was at work.

 

Ideally I would have talked to her in person, but I think it would be a really bad idea to go to her work while she was there. Even though I go there a lot otherwise.

[Rinaaa]

I think waiting a few weeks is a bit long and excessive. Showing up at her work unexpected and unannounced would also be a bit much and might scare her off more, if she's already been somewhat scared off. You could text her and ask her when a good time to call her would be and see what she says. And during that phone call apologize for coming on too strong, but let her know that you're interested in seeing her again. If she's not a phone person, you could always just text her again, let her know you'd really like to take her out and spend time with her and ask her to let you know when she's free. Leave the ball in her court and see what happens.

[SmileFace]

Stop contacting her. She isn't interested.