sinner Posted August 18, 2004 Posted August 18, 2004 Spock, you're weak. I bet you a dollar that you'll be back in your MM's arms within 10 days. You love the "game," too much.
Author Mr Spock Posted August 18, 2004 Author Posted August 18, 2004 I love/hate the game. Your dollar is worth more anyways sinner, my sneaky friend. Dunno. We'll see. I am certainly not going to initiate sex. I can at least do that. I can't "ignore" him-I don't want to piss him off, and I won't. But if he wants sex, let him initiate it. I am hoping to explain to him why this is not important to me. Why it needs to not continue.
Author Mr Spock Posted August 22, 2004 Author Posted August 22, 2004 I've since attended another group function with my current MM-girlfriend in tow-and I really, REALLY like her. We get along. But it doesn't make me feel bad for sleeping with her man. And it won't make me stop. I think that as long as he still desires me, I'll continue to do what I'm doing. Really what I should be doing is running in the other direction. But how can I? I find him SO attractive. We were out on the deck with the hostess and I turned to talk to her and he made a quick grab of my ass. Not exactly high romance, but hey, considering it's hard to hit on someone when your girlfriend is in the same house it's something. I suppose I do have a need to feel wanted, attractive-I tend to get very dissapointed when we all get together as a group and he doesn't express intent to hump, but I realize that if we ended up screwing around every time we met people would begin to talk. As is, I don't think anyone has any REAL idea, because I behave the same outwardly to everyone. But his SO did ensure she came This time around, I don't have the same delusions -I doubt he'll leave his SO for me. It would be nice, as we're very alike and we get along fabulously, but I don't underestimate the importance of children and a 9+ year history. Also I know and like his SO, so I wouldn't want that to happen as she'd be hurt. I alternate between being satisfied with the knowledge that he wants me and wanting more from him. I'd just like to know how to go about getting it. It makes me wish I hadn't allowed him to pursue me-I don't WANT to get deeply emotionally involved with this guy. I don't want to become needy and desparate for any kind of contact. I don't want to look forward to seeing him-thrill of the chase and all that sh*t. I will continue to pursue other options in the meantime.
Author Mr Spock Posted August 22, 2004 Author Posted August 22, 2004 PS-I'm still continuing to bore the masses with the paltry details of my life-but I fear retribution from grinning maniac if I start a new thread in regards to anything to do with me. I think the best thing for my mental health from all of this is for him to WANT a meaningful relationship with me out in the open, and for me to turn him down. That way in my mind things would be level.
meanon Posted August 22, 2004 Posted August 22, 2004 Why would things be level? Has he rejected you? It still sounds to me like you are seeking control. Whether it's to avoid being vulnerable or because the power is a thrill I'm not sure. Maybe both? If it's the former then it's a risky strategy, Spock as it will only work if you can stay uninvolved emotionally.
Samson Posted August 22, 2004 Posted August 22, 2004 So in the space of writing ONE thread, with phone call, I've gone from almost wanting to cry to elation. Spock Meanon, do you really think it is realistic to expect Spock to have control that "will only work if you can stay uninvolved emotionally?" Spock, I'm to damn lazy to read through the entire freakin' thread, and most of what I have to say, you've already heard, and certainly thought. Don't sweat the small stuff, Samson.
Author Mr Spock Posted August 22, 2004 Author Posted August 22, 2004 Yeah. I'm too lazy to read through it too-I'm going to end up contradicting myself probably. No, I haven't been rejected. Ass grabbing confirms that. I just get dissapointed when we meet at group functions and he can't put out. Unrealistic of me, but still happens. I'm just going to mellow for a while. Not think about it.
meanon Posted August 22, 2004 Posted August 22, 2004 Meanon, do you really think it is realistic to expect Spock to have control that "will only work if you can stay uninvolved emotionally?" No I don't. I think Spock may be getting sucked in. Spock, only you know if this is a minor irritant that you will forget as soon as the thrill of the chase is on again (or indeed, another chase ) or if it has the potential to be harmful.
Author Mr Spock Posted August 22, 2004 Author Posted August 22, 2004 Alright, I MAY be getting sucked in, and I'm backpedalling like mad to avoid it. I should let you know that our first sexual encounter was an eye opener-simply because there were three of us there. Yes. Three. Myself, my current close girlfriend and him ended back at my place after a group function, and somehow we all ended up in bed together. I did not participate with her, and vice versa, but it was an eye opener. It helped keep things in perspective at the time that he was not falling madly in love with me. Now, it's just two-she won't participate again. It was more of her coming in and me not wanting to hurt my friends feelings by kicking her out sort of thing. (I SAID I had some stuff to tell you meanon) Maybe that's how I'll avoid the trap-just stick with orgies.
Samson Posted August 22, 2004 Posted August 22, 2004 Ah HA! I knew there was more to the group function when it was first mentioned. And what a thoughtful sort you are, Mr. Spock, not wanting to hurt your "close friend's" feelings. How could anyone be so sensative, yet willing to cut out fragile hearts with a steak knife? Yes, it is quite a paradox you present, Mr. Spock! Don't you think it is possible for him to, well...............do whatever he did with your friend, and still remain emotionally tied to you?
meanon Posted August 22, 2004 Posted August 22, 2004 It was more of her coming in and me not wanting to hurt my friends feelings by kicking her out sort of thing. (I SAID I had some stuff to tell you meanon) The social etiquette of the menage a trois Maybe that's how I'll avoid the trap-just stick with orgies. Well, that's one solution
Author Mr Spock Posted August 22, 2004 Author Posted August 22, 2004 It's a pickle, for sure. He won't do it again with her because I told her after that it would make me jealous. Not that I have any claim-I would find it disrespectful that's all. And she won't. She likes to pretend it didn't happen And "close friends" don't normally go for hurting each others feelings. You like that steak knife analogy don't you I suppose because I have a very flexible moral grey area. hahahah. Look guys, I'm REALLY not a monster!! I have been known to consider the feelings of others before I act.......
Samson Posted August 22, 2004 Posted August 22, 2004 Look guys, I'm REALLY not a monster!! Mr Spock or Elephant Man?>>>>>>You decide.
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