Teelzo Posted October 24, 2012 Posted October 24, 2012 I'm new to forums so bear with me... So I'm just going to make this as short as I can. I was with this girl over a year ago, she was a perfect match for me. My first serious relationship and things were going great. I was starting to fall in love with her, and I guess I just didn't know how to handle it, so I messed it all up and I broke it off with her. The girl was perfect for me, and she loved me so much. She posted tweets about me for 7 months after the breakup saying how much she missed me. I'm just terrible at handling things, always have been. I regretted breaking it off right after I did, but for some reason I just couldn't bring my self to talk to her.(I know..) So we basically went a year without talking, she dated someone for a while and I've been single the whole time. Shes single now, and for some reason I decided to send her a text message a couple weeks ago. I didn't expect a reply but she did, it was a breif conversation and we just caught up on some things. Basically I just want to know if you guys think its even worth it to try and get her back, and how to go about it? I mean what I did was an ******* move, and if I was her, I wouldn't even consider it. But I miss her a lot. I still love her even after all this time.
Carenth Posted October 24, 2012 Posted October 24, 2012 Considering I was once one the opposite end of a similar situation. If my ex ever contacted me I would be friendly but not friends, I would never want to be with her again. I still care about her and wish her the best in life but when someone hurts you like that it's hard to trust them again. I personally would just move on, as you will never be able to revive the relationship you had. It would have to be a completely new relationship with her and chances are she still would be holding some residual mistrust towards you. That is if she is even interested, which I would say more than likely not in most cases.
ScienceGal Posted October 24, 2012 Posted October 24, 2012 How are you sure that you're ready to treat her, or anyone else, right? Have you figured out why you left and then didn't contact her when you realized you made a mistake, despite her 7 MONTHS of posting about you? In my opinion, unless you've sorted yourself out and are 100% certain about it, leave the poor girl alone. 1
Carenth Posted October 24, 2012 Posted October 24, 2012 How are you sure that you're ready to treat her, or anyone else, right? Have you figured out why you left and then didn't contact her when you realized you made a mistake, despite her 7 MONTHS of posting about you? In my opinion, unless you've sorted yourself out and are 100% certain about it, leave the poor girl alone. Truer words can't be spoken. You need to make sure you have sorted out your own problems and figured out why you fled in the first place before even considering trying to getting back with her. Anything less is just cruel.
ScienceGal Posted October 24, 2012 Posted October 24, 2012 I also dated someone who left me twice... tried to come back for a third chance too. He wasn't a jerk, and actually had the best of intentions... but, he hurt me with all of his indecision and all of the personal growth he had to go through. Don't be that guy, OP. You said you've been single the entire time... why? Sort yourself out before you try to date anyone. Don't default to her because you're lonely. Good luck.
Author Teelzo Posted October 24, 2012 Author Posted October 24, 2012 Glad I made the decision to post here. All good feedback. I know that I am ready, because I will never make a mistake like that again. I guess I have been focusing on other things (school, work, gym, friends) I just havn't found another girl like her. I've dated and come close to relationships since. I just miss the connection we had, honestly it was perfect. I don't know what I was thinking, I know that if I had another chance I would not mess it up again, because I've thought a lot about it and changed since then, for the best. It's not that I'm resorting to her because I'm lonely, I'm content with being single right now, I'm pretty busy as it is. Either way, I'm a happy person, and usually always see the positive sides of things so don't be afraid to say something. I just wanted to get some insight on this situation.
Carenth Posted October 24, 2012 Posted October 24, 2012 You just need to remember that connection you had is gone. It no longer exists, if you were to get back together with her (assuming she is willing) you wouldn't just fall back into the relationship you had it will be something different. You have changed and she has changed. I'm also sorry to say relationships are never perfect I think you might be idealising what your relationship was, if it was perfect you would of not walked away in the first place. Nothing in this world is perfect. It's good that you have moved on so to say but you won't be able to truly move on if you keep comparing girls you date with your idealised ex-girlfriend. It's not fair to the girls you have been dating to compare them to the dream girl in your head. Sorry if that seems a bit harsh but I've seen this before with friends who pined over the "one they let get away" for years.
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