Grandoptimist Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 I'll keep it short. We had been dating for almost 2 years. She's now almost 20 (was 18 when we started, and I'm 24 now (22 when we started). Everything started off great, we hit it off tremendously, I loved her instantly. Pretty sure she felt the same. Tons in common, similar (yet different) personalities. We started being on and off after a few months of dating. She feared commitment because of her age, and we generally both knew and accepted that eventually she'd need to go out and test the waters because she was so young when we met. How would she know if it was meant to be? We were each others first love, and that's one thing that scares me. Each time we broke up, it wasn't nasty or bad or messy. It was simply "I think now is the time to do it" (she also "liked" another guy and this pushed these feelings on her constantly). We would always end up back with each other because it was too hard to be apart. We didn't split THAT many times, maybe 4-6 over almost 2 years. The splits never lasted longer than a week or so. Now we have broken up and it was a bit messy this time. She admitted she doesn't love me the same (and honestly after everything, I don't love her the same but I still love her. She feels the same) and I think we tried to push it this last time. She gets really mad at a lot of little things and that was driving me crazy. We fought more and more and almost 3 weeks ago now we split, and there's been 0 contact. Honestly, I know there's more girls out there and all that stuff, but I really love this girl and I love her family. If we both step away and grow as individuals, I feel like I could spend the rest of my life with her. What are the chances of this working out? Anyone have experience with a situation like this where maybe one or both was too young and needed time to grow as a person before being in the relationship? I feel like if we had me a couple of years down the road things may have been a lot different. I'll be sticking to no contact 100% and I'm hoping for the best down the road. Trying to move on but its so hard right now!! I miss her like crazy!! Thanks for reading!!
flitzanu Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 yup, i was in that age frame exactly. at 22, she was 18, dated til i was 25 and she was 20, lived together nearly those 2 years, and she eventually grew up and wanted to experience life (which means, she decided she wanted to bang other people). age is relevant in your issue, but also it's relevant that some people just decide they don't want to be with you anymore. also you said you broke up like 6 times, which is quite a bit. if your relationship was rocksolid, you would wouldn't have broken up once. pay attention to that aspect of it. you've HAD the thoughts of being apart, and broken up, who's to say you won't do it again?
River Rain Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 That's a lot of breakups over a 2-year period, even if they were amicable. If the break up this time was so messy, like you said, lots of anger it seems on her part...sounds like it's very much over. You don't know what will happen years from now, but I wouldn't put life on hold in the hopes that you two were "meant to be" and will magically meet up again when you're both experienced enough. It's a nice fantasy, but not very realistic don't you think?
Author Grandoptimist Posted October 23, 2012 Author Posted October 23, 2012 Thanks for the responses, i appreciate the input. I didn't mean to make it sound like I'm just going to put my life on hold or anything like that. I desperately want to meet someone new to help me move on and to experience a new relationship. There are 2 girls I have been contemplating asking out for a coffee or something for awhile and during our breakups, but I feel like I just don't REALLY like them. Maybe its just because of the situation, but I feel like I liked my ex way more before we started dating. Maybe the next girl isn't in my life yet. All i know is she needs to hurry the heck up! 1
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