gonefishin Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 Ok I've been thinking a lot lately and this question Keeps going round and round for me.. When should you actually face the facts and walk away. Lets just say the relationship came to an abrupt End and the feelings are all still there . Your now back in contact ( not back best friends but been civil and meeting the odd time) after a month apart. I know people say stop contact and move on . But what if u feel its worth trying to fix ? You close the door on this small talk and possibly close the door on a potential Make up.? Like do people feel one rule kinda suits all. Cause I still feel the feelings are there and if a bit of perseverance might get another chance ... I'm not a fool and if this little bit of civilness turns to nothing than the hurt starts over from square one . See I kinda feel I have no power here and it's all her choices .. Like if I get annoyed with this chit-chat and tell her I'm sick of this this is only a shadow of what we were it shows I'm still the insensitive jerk she always thought I was.. It's so frustrating when all your been thrown is crumbs but like all this i suppose time will tell and if its time to let go time will help... Really enjoy this site as its comforting to know I'm not the only one that feels like a love sick puppy.. Thanks for reading . Hope your all keeping a little happy out there
Calico Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 When you had enough. Are you sick of the pain and the confusion yet? Only you can answer that. It took me weeks of agony and embarrassing myself until I got to that point, and then I walked. It's painful to see when other people do the same, but it's a decision no one else can make for you. I didn't listen before I realized for myself that I was a fool. From here, you sound like you had enough.
Author gonefishin Posted October 23, 2012 Author Posted October 23, 2012 I really feel I want to have had enough .. But I don't want to walk away .. I feel I'm literally living checking my phone for any sign of hope.. It's killing me ... I treated her so badly for so long I think she is trying to make me work.. Or maybe that me just been crazy and failing to see that she's not that interested . If she wasn't interested she wouldn't meet ? The connection wouldn't be there when we meet ? But once she goes away her texts are impossible they don't even lead me into follow ups If I thought I could walk away and stay strong I'd walk... And actually thinking I'm so low and sad right now it can't get worse ... Maybe I need acceptance that it is over ?
Liz2012 Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 If you treated her bad then yeah she's gonna want to see you work at things and show you're a different person now. else you will keep staring into a blank phone. You have to work on yourself and if that needs moving on for now, then yes, do it and try to get into a good place.
Regrets58 Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 Took me over 4 months to pull myself out of regular(daily)contact with ex. We were almost like a couple again,spent a lot of enjoyable time together. However confusion and torment reigned when I wasn't with her. Eventually it sunk in that we were not getting back together. What killed it for me,was not wanting to be around when she started seeing someone else.
taya Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 yeah its really not hard to know. for me i will kown but still stay and be there taking the pain unhappy crying and beating my self up ever day .but when my mind say i have had enough i completely change and will let that peron go in a minute beacuse my mind body and soul have had it. but am working on my self to just let go as soon as i know its no good or not going to work out. its not easy but am wroking on it
mishy Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 i think the right time to let go is when you get sick and tired of being sick and tired. You will know when you get there.
Author gonefishin Posted October 23, 2012 Author Posted October 23, 2012 Like I think deep down I know the glaring fact that if she wanted to be with me she would be here .. There's nothing stopping her but she hasn't come back .. If I go no contact now is that a total mess and just wreck what I've done to get back to even been able to talk and have a laugh ? Or am I just kidding myself .. Thanks again for taking the time to reply guys it really helps .
taya Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 Like I think deep down I know the glaring fact that if she wanted to be with me she would be here .. There's nothing stopping her but she hasn't come back .. If I go no contact now is that a total mess and just wreck what I've done to get back to even been able to talk and have a laugh ? Or am I just kidding myself .. Thanks again for taking the time to reply guys it really helps . your welcome hun but if she wanted to be with you she would. there is nothing you can do when someone do this, but move on its hard am going through kinda the same thing and today i have made up my mind to move on i will not be someone option. its hard as hell tho but if that person wanted us as much as we wanted them they would have been with usright now, u never know they may come back but until then am living my life and not stressing my self over nobody think about it are they stressing over US ?
Author gonefishin Posted October 23, 2012 Author Posted October 23, 2012 Yeah very wise words ..it's funny how many games get played in love Why can't people say what they mean and feel honestly .. I sent the text and got back the reply nothing ever good enough you should be Glad i give you the time of day.. Asked then do u want me to just go .. And now silence ... But in this case silence is pretty loud ! I asked the question I got my answer ... I don't think I now need it spelt out.. Thanks for listening .
taya Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 (edited) Yeah very wise words ..it's funny how many games get played in love Why can't people say what they mean and feel honestly .. I sent the text and got back the reply nothing ever good enough you should be Glad i give you the time of day.. Asked then do u want me to just go .. And now silence ... But in this case silence is pretty loud ! I asked the question I got my answer ... I don't think I now need it spelt out.. Thanks for listening . aww am so sorry she is a fool wow mine reply but with alot of bull but the sad thing is i always be texting him even tho i know to just let it go today i made the mistake beacuse it was so hard not to tell him how i feel about everthing but all i know i will get is alot of bull. i have to stop texting now and move on ITS TIME TO LET GO FOR SURE . yeah and the silence is pretty loud there will be a day coming soon she may regret doing this until then its wise to let it go now so many fish in the sea;) Edited October 23, 2012 by taya
Author gonefishin Posted October 23, 2012 Author Posted October 23, 2012 Better off leaving them to it when They feel like that .. I've done wrong but genuinely Tried to right it no need to be treated like Something you stepped in .. This site helps too I like to give some advice even if I'm Crap at taking my own .... It will all be ok in the end .. And if its not Ok than its not the end ! I wish u well !
taya Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 aww thanks and you too so whats your plan now to go NC?
Author gonefishin Posted October 23, 2012 Author Posted October 23, 2012 I'm really not sure .. I think there something else wrong With her but I'm not close enough to ask anymore... Maybe I'm imagining it I sent another text saying I'm here to listen But no reply .. When will I learn ;((
taya Posted October 24, 2012 Posted October 24, 2012 (edited) I'm really not sure .. I think there something else wrong With her but I'm not close enough to ask anymore... Maybe I'm imagining it I sent another text saying I'm here to listen But no reply .. When will I learn ;(( aww am sorry but i really think you should not text her anymore if u want her back you have to make her come on her own you see the more you text the more you will push her away truse me am a girl i know and i dont think anything is wrong with he,r her reply to you was QUOTE your lucky i gave you the time of day she is trying to act up because you keep texting her let her be her lost i know its hard as hell tho but you just have to stop texting her i think she will text after she see u stop Edited October 24, 2012 by taya
LostOne1 Posted October 24, 2012 Posted October 24, 2012 aww am sorry but i really think you should not text her anymore if u want her back you have to make her come on her own you see the more you text the more you will push her away truse me am a girl i know and i dont think anything is wrong with he,r her reply to you was QUOTE your lucky i gave you the time of day she is trying to act up because you keep texting her let her be her lost i know its hard as hell tho but you just have to stop texting her i think she will text after she see u stop I agree. I did that with my ex finally after fighting for her.. I just told her I was done and was gonna give up and stopped all contact. A day after I have had her chasing me now for days... So all I can say to the OP is what you have said.. just stop and let it go.. when she's ready and calm and in a better state of mind to talk.. she will...
Author gonefishin Posted October 24, 2012 Author Posted October 24, 2012 Thanks guys we met last night and she got real angry again!! Cause I asked what the bells going on are we just friends ? I really haven't a clue and needed some answers I didn't ask demandingly Or rude .. But she flipped Said all she can offer is friendship ? I think she's fighting off harder feelings than she's showing We were in like a casual diner just eating. Burger but her eyes filled up and She went the bathroom thinking I didn't cop? Is this a sign... She also said I'm here now isn't that a sign ! But whats wrong I feel is she wants to keep dwelling on the past why can't she see that's gone.. Her attitude stinks she talks to me like I'm something she just stepped in... I gotta let go I know this now.... But it's hard when your clinging on with everything to nothing ....
taya Posted October 24, 2012 Posted October 24, 2012 Thanks guys we met last night and she got real angry again!! Cause I asked what the bells going on are we just friends ? I really haven't a clue and needed some answers I didn't ask demandingly Or rude .. But she flipped Said all she can offer is friendship ? I think she's fighting off harder feelings than she's showing We were in like a casual diner just eating. Burger but her eyes filled up and She went the bathroom thinking I didn't cop? Is this a sign... She also said I'm here now isn't that a sign ! But whats wrong I feel is she wants to keep dwelling on the past why can't she see that's gone.. Her attitude stinks she talks to me like I'm something she just stepped in... I gotta let go I know this now.... But it's hard when your clinging on with everything to nothing .... thats why we say let her come to you i think the reason she is acting like this beacuse you keep running after her set her free no text no call from now on and you will see i think she will come back and if she dont it really wasent ment to be she seem like she as no respect for you at this point and if you keep running after her i promise you it will only get worst your acting too desperate and she is useing it against you ...i learn from a experiance i had and also seen first hand with other people and there relationship you got to learn when to let them go am teaching my self that everday becuse if you dont you will ruined anything that could have been rebuild. let go move on she may come back she may not but guess what if she does come back its beacuse she wants and miss you and had time to look over everthing and see she wants you , and not beause you beg her to come back or keep bothering her with texts and call. by then you may have someone eles so it would be her lost
Author gonefishin Posted October 24, 2012 Author Posted October 24, 2012 Why are there no detox programmes for this hahah 2 week checkin and you come back fine !!! Invent that together and I'll split my fortune with ya lol!
taya Posted October 24, 2012 Posted October 24, 2012 (edited) Why are there no detox programmes for this hahah 2 week checkin and you come back fine !!! Invent that together and I'll split my fortune with ya lol! hahahah am ok now tho the guy i was talking about we talk and he say some good things i agree with we are not togather any more just friends we say maybe in the future so am moving on i already have a few guys ask me out on dates and i will be going so i have let go even tho he still texts and calls me but we both know he as problems he needs to fixs until then this hot mama will be doing her thing am only 21 i dont need no drama lol if we are ment to be we will be i have my life to focus on , i had this really cute hot guy hitting on me last night hahaha and that was fun help me to see there is alot of fish in the sea ... but they have no programs lol we can try to invent one tho lol you just have to just let her go dont text her dont call if she wants you she will be back..and when it gets hard and you feel like texting her or you feeling down just post here am here alot and i know others here will tell you what you need to ear and make you feel better Edited October 24, 2012 by taya 1
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