OnceInLove92 Posted October 22, 2012 Posted October 22, 2012 Well, I sort of told her... lol. So I've been talking to this girl for 2 months, and I have to say, I've really grown feelings for her. When I'm around her, it seems like nothing else matters. I honestly don't think I've met a girl quite like her; she's funny, laid back, fun to be with, and she's and all-around great girl. But she can be hard to talk to some times. We text and talk every day. It seems like some days, she likes talking to me, and others she seems a little rude and doesn't respond to a text I've sent, or will just be like "ok gotta go". I've noticed she may be playing "hard to get". When I come to her, she doesn't text me as much. So I just think, whatever, I'll let her come to me. I don't talk to her for almost an entire day, and with no surprise, she texts me with happy and funny things. It's kind of driving me a little crazy. I think to myself, "Hmmm, I think she might dig me!", then followed by "Dammit. I don't know if she likes me." It's a really confusing time, considering we both got out of a relationship about 3 months ago, so I can kind of feel that "afraid to commit" feeling from her. But honestly, she's completely different than all of the girls I've dated. I feel like I've known her for a long time. And I love it. So, last night, I asked her if she wanted to go for a quick drive. We did, and I showed her my house that I grew up in as a kid. Told her a couple of stories, and told her "I wouldn't be the person I am now if it weren't for this house." Then I asked her what she thought of herself. I could tell she was a little hesitant at first, but she admitted that she's trying to get her life back together, and she's trying to change for the better. Then, this is what I told her: "You know, that first night when we hung out, I realized that you are fun to be around, funny, and energetic. But I noticed that even though you are these things, I can tell there's something deeper inside of you. I want to let you know that you're a beautiful person." To which she responded in a very cute "Thank you". Couldn't really tell if it was a nervous thank you, or a sincere one. But I finally got that off my chest. She knows that people think bad of her because of her past, but I can really see her changing herself. I spoke this from the bottom of my heart, and i had to grow some serious balls before I let her know. So, what do you all think? Did I do the right thing? Did I go too far? 1
InJest Posted October 22, 2012 Posted October 22, 2012 You went too far. She's probably a bit weirded out and completely turned off. Sounds like she wants something casual and you're bringing all these sappy feelings into it, and hinting at something long term, which she almost assuredly does not want. She probably wants you **** the hell out of her, and all you want to do is talk about how special she is. Barf. Don't bring up this nonsense anymore, and treat this whole thing as casual. And after two months, if you haven't slept with her, then she's really not interested and it's time to walk.
mortensorchid Posted October 22, 2012 Posted October 22, 2012 I would just let it slide, you are getting far too heavy and deep with her. Is she playing hard to get? Well maybe, but have you ever considered the fact that she may be a little affraid of these questions? I would be. Years ago I went out with this man who I later found out had an agenda with women - he asked all of them the same questions over and over (why did your last relationship end? what do you think of people spending so much on weddings?, etc.) I began to realize it really had nothing to do with me, this is just some kind of nutcase reasoning. I'd keep things casual and let it slide, be fun and easy rather than deep and cheesy. That's how you come off as.
HeldbyGravity Posted October 22, 2012 Posted October 22, 2012 I'm the odd one out... I don't think you went too far at all. A lot of women would love to hear this sort of thing every so often. 4
sweetkiwi Posted October 22, 2012 Posted October 22, 2012 depends which side of the fence she's leaning towards. I think this is sweet coming from a certain kind of guy who i have a certain kind of chemistry with. But if he was all that special i probably would've ****ed him by now.
Author OnceInLove92 Posted October 22, 2012 Author Posted October 22, 2012 I appreciate the diverse feedback! It's good to hear both sides of the spectrum.
Author OnceInLove92 Posted October 22, 2012 Author Posted October 22, 2012 wow, sweet. I'm wondering if this is sarcasm?
LoverOfDance Posted October 22, 2012 Posted October 22, 2012 Tbh, if a guy said that to me I would think it was sweet but I wouldn't think it meant much. While he might feel like he just revealed his feelings to me, I wouldn't really see it as a romantic gesture/comment. I would think about it 4 a few hours and then 4get about it. I know u feel like u just poured out your soul which you did without a doubt but I think u still have some more work to do. Get closer to her. Hang out more. I would advice u to let her know how u feel now without beating around the bush to avoid ending up in the friendzone. Good luck!
Mrlonelyone Posted October 22, 2012 Posted October 22, 2012 Her saying thankyou wasn't sarcasm. If she did not like you opening up to her I think she would have said something about when you were showing your boyhood home. The people who say if she was really interested she would have ####'d you by now maybe maybe not. Not everyone moves that fast, reading the OP's posting history they are not one of the fast movers. Assuming you and her are on the same general page. It sounds like the two of you had a nice night out two months into your not easily definable relationship. You are not BF and GF but your more than friends. The next time you take her out like that, perhaps to see where she grew up or something like it, don't talk. Take her by the hand, or better yet go in for a kiss. You'll know how a person really feels from those things more than by what they say. 1
Author OnceInLove92 Posted October 23, 2012 Author Posted October 23, 2012 I really meant it as sweet. Oh, ok. Well thank you!
kerme Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 No, you didn't go too far. So what else has happened? Are you two dating or going out now?
Author OnceInLove92 Posted October 23, 2012 Author Posted October 23, 2012 No, you didn't go too far. So what else has happened? Are you two dating or going out now? Well... I texted her yesterday morning. Had a small convo. Since then, haven't talked to her since. I'm waiting for her to come to me, because I'm always the one to text her. Do you think that's the right move? I honestly don't want to come across as a needy/clingy type. But I DO want to talk to her. I'm just testing to see if she really want's to talk to me.
kerme Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 Well... I texted her yesterday morning. Had a small convo. Since then, haven't talked to her since. I'm waiting for her to come to me, because I'm always the one to text her. Do you think that's the right move? I honestly don't want to come across as a needy/clingy type. But I DO want to talk to her. I'm just testing to see if she really want's to talk to me. No I don't think that's the right move. It could backfire on you. Think about it. You aren't even dating yet. She might be sitting around waiting for you to contact her or ask her out. You don't want this to fizzle out due to inaction. So you contact her first for awhile. Big deal. If and after you two start dating, then you can let her initiate contact too. Like I told another poster on a different thread, you will never even get to that point if you play games. 2
todreaminblue Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 Well, I sort of told her... lol. So I've been talking to this girl for 2 months, and I have to say, I've really grown feelings for her. When I'm around her, it seems like nothing else matters. I honestly don't think I've met a girl quite like her; she's funny, laid back, fun to be with, and she's and all-around great girl. But she can be hard to talk to some times. We text and talk every day. It seems like some days, she likes talking to me, and others she seems a little rude and doesn't respond to a text I've sent, or will just be like "ok gotta go". I've noticed she may be playing "hard to get". When I come to her, she doesn't text me as much. So I just think, whatever, I'll let her come to me. I don't talk to her for almost an entire day, and with no surprise, she texts me with happy and funny things. It's kind of driving me a little crazy. I think to myself, "Hmmm, I think she might dig me!", then followed by "Dammit. I don't know if she likes me." It's a really confusing time, considering we both got out of a relationship about 3 months ago, so I can kind of feel that "afraid to commit" feeling from her. But honestly, she's completely different than all of the girls I've dated. I feel like I've known her for a long time. And I love it. So, last night, I asked her if she wanted to go for a quick drive. We did, and I showed her my house that I grew up in as a kid. Told her a couple of stories, and told her "I wouldn't be the person I am now if it weren't for this house." Then I asked her what she thought of herself. I could tell she was a little hesitant at first, but she admitted that she's trying to get her life back together, and she's trying to change for the better. Then, this is what I told her: "You know, that first night when we hung out, I realized that you are fun to be around, funny, and energetic. But I noticed that even though you are these things, I can tell there's something deeper inside of you. I want to let you know that you're a beautiful person." To which she responded in a very cute "Thank you". Couldn't really tell if it was a nervous thank you, or a sincere one. But I finally got that off my chest. She knows that people think bad of her because of her past, but I can really see her changing herself. I spoke this from the bottom of my heart, and i had to grow some serious balls before I let her know. So, what do you all think? Did I do the right thing? Did I go too far? I donT think you went too far because you were honest and said it from youR heart when people cant do this or doubt that its right....it lets me know that the world is becoming seriously stuffed up that you cant be yourself you have to play games...life isnt a game its a gift..when you get to the point where you wonder if you are going to be able to take another breath....being honest seems like the best policy.. i tell people i care abotu my feelings and that i think they rock scared or not..mostly i am a chicken but i do it...........life is way too short and can be over too quickly to play childish games with your heart.....you absolutely did the alpha male thing you spoke truthfully from your heart..if she doesnt appreciate or note that fact...it is her loss.......from me to you KUDOS.........deb 1
frd150 Posted October 24, 2012 Posted October 24, 2012 You mentioned her past. I'm guessing that she probably has dated people that were not capable what you did. Pure speculation. She might not have known how to respond. Maybe your the first nice guy in a string of losers...who knows? Let her absorb that moment for a while. In the mean time do not play games,just be yourself and go on like you did before. She obviously likes you so do not scare her off or worse...turn her off. 1
Author OnceInLove92 Posted October 24, 2012 Author Posted October 24, 2012 Thanks everyone for your feedback! Yeah, I texted her recently, and it's still hard for her to carry on a conversation with me. I don't think she's too interested. Whatever, I guess you can only tell within a matter of a week or two. I'll keep you all updated.
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