PinkPods Posted October 21, 2012 Share Posted October 21, 2012 So lately my bf has been too busy and hasnt had any time to talk to me. its been like this ever since he moved out on his own. Ive talked to him about this and he says that he still loves me and wants to be with me, but hes just so busy with work, doing things around his house, etc. I just feel unappreciated because im always there for him no matter what im doing and now im just craving for his attention since i barely get to talk to him. I dont think its so difficult to call someone for a minute out of the whole day to let them know you're okay and i dont want to constantly try to get in touch with him cause i'll feel clingy. I dont know what to do anymore. I dont want to leave him and regret it cause i love him so much. But i feel like he's just too busy for a gf right now. Any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
Nightsky Posted October 21, 2012 Share Posted October 21, 2012 The title says it all. Your bf is too busy for you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
River Rain Posted October 21, 2012 Share Posted October 21, 2012 So lately my bf has been too busy and hasnt had any time to talk to me. its been like this ever since he moved out on his own. Ive talked to him about this and he says that he still loves me and wants to be with me, but hes just so busy with work, doing things around his house, etc. I just feel unappreciated because im always there for him no matter what im doing and now im just craving for his attention since i barely get to talk to him. I dont think its so difficult to call someone for a minute out of the whole day to let them know you're okay and i dont want to constantly try to get in touch with him cause i'll feel clingy. I dont know what to do anymore. I dont want to leave him and regret it cause i love him so much. But i feel like he's just too busy for a gf right now. Any advice? My advice is simply this: If a person WANTS to make an effort, they will find a way. Sure he might be very busy, new place, job etc....but if he's committed to you, you're right, it takes a person a minute to make a phone call. If it keeps up, I wouldn't waste any further time, but I'm a little hardcore when it comes to being ignored, I can't stand it and won't put up with it from a person who supposedly loves me. Have you told him you feel unappreciated? If not, you need to tell him in person so that you guys can figure something out. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted October 21, 2012 Share Posted October 21, 2012 I had this exact problem a year ago with a guy who lived nine miles from me and couldn't fine any time to be with me. I finally told him that I was lonely and if he wasn't available, I was going to find someone who was available. He understood and I left the door open for him to call when he became available to see if I was still available... A month later, I was dating a man who lived 70 miles from me, ran his own business, and had children in his life 50% of the time who DID find time to see me as often as possible. When I was on my third date with the new guy (and ready to do the dirty), the old guy called.... Too late! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
River Rain Posted October 21, 2012 Share Posted October 21, 2012 I'm not all talk no action either...I just took my own advice. The guy I've been getting to know has not contacted me in over 48 hours now, despite saying some very special things to me in his last message. I know he's busy so I let yesterday slide but now it's zero tolerance time. I'm not contacting him again. Sure it hurts, I'm shedding tears because I do like him, but I can't let myself be a doormat. If he wanted to make the effort to contact me, he would have. Point final. I hope you're strong enough to do what's right for you! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PinkPods Posted October 21, 2012 Author Share Posted October 21, 2012 its just so hard not to try and call or something. Im so tempted to text him, but im trying my best not to. Link to post Share on other sites
CopingGal Posted October 22, 2012 Share Posted October 22, 2012 I am a living, breathing, walking example, that when a guy keeps saying he's too busy, what he really means is that he doesn't want to take the time. My ex had every excuse in the book to spend so little, little, little time with me. For three years, I put up with that. Then when he finally got a great job with better hours, he used his time to look for other women and cheat on me. He gave ALL of his time to the women he cheated on me with. I learned my lesson. If someone doesn't make adequate time for me, I'm gone, because people who truly, truly want to be with you, will make the time. Believe that. It doesn't matter, kids, job, whatever. It doesn't matter. They will find a way to make time for you if they really want to. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
malmsu09 Posted October 22, 2012 Share Posted October 22, 2012 I am also an example of somebody who says they are too busy for you. I dated a guy for just over a year who told me up front that he does work a lot. At the beginning, he made adequate time for me as you would expect a new relationship....but after about 3 months in...the time he had for me grew less and less. I work nights and on the nights I had off...he normally wouldn't come home from working until almost 10ish. But so many times when I was working, I would find out that he was going out to eat with friends or at the bar with friends. Yet on any night I had off....he was busy. Or if he wasn't busy it was because he wanted us to all go out with his friends. He never made time for "us". He kept saying that he would...that he just had to finish a the current project. But after that project was done, it was another one. It was non-stop. Then people started saying that he was seeing his ex when he was supposedly "working". Anyway, not saying that he is cheating whatsoever but if somebody wants u in their life, they will make time. We argued so much about him never making time for me and I told him it was threatening our relationship. Did he change? No. I ended up leaving him, for many other reasons including this one, and he still says to this day that if I would have just waited a few more weeks that he would have had much more time for me. Ha! BS. Just tell him how you feel. Actions speak louder than words. If he cares, h will make time. If he doesn't make time, well I'm sorry my dear he is not worth your time. Good luck... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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