slaguna Posted October 21, 2012 Posted October 21, 2012 So i've been with my girlfriend for about year and change, there is something i am not sure how to deal with, she is a great person loving caring, sweet beautiful shes got it all except 3 different occasions. 1st. we are at a restaurant having dinner behind her table of 6 girls they look familiar i look at them and she ruins the night accusing me of flirting with them in front of her etc etc meanwhile i only took a look because they looked familiar... i felt falsely accused and i felt she over reacted for me simply looking over to another table for the simple reason they sounded familiar anyways this completely ruined the night to the point of almost breakup. 2nd time. we are at dinner once again, and this time a friend of her is also having dinner, at a nearby table behind her and she accuses me of staring at her that iam attracted to her bla bla bla meanwhile none of this happened, i felt so falsely accused but she was so convinced by simply assuming this was so once again ruined our night almost to the point of breaking up. 3rd we are at a wedding last night and she creates this whole movie that i was flirting with the bridemaid during the ceremony and that i want a blonde girl instead of her bla bla bla when i hinestly didnt even know what the bridesmaid looked like, at this point im getting kind of used her creating entire scenarios with me with other girls and she is so convinced her stories are true which leaves me without words i dont know what to do then shes angry and crying for hours thought of breakup etc.. i know this is insecurity immaturity i dont know how to help her anymore ive been so patient taken the blame after...
River Rain Posted October 21, 2012 Posted October 21, 2012 If you truly weren't flirting, and you've done all you can to make her feel loved and wanted, then there isn't really much more you can do to be honest. She has trust issues and lots of insecurity and only she can change that. Jealousy is not an attractive quality in a person. She knows that she has the problem, and it's up to her to make the change. If she doesn't, then I don't think you will be happy staying with her.
JLS07 Posted October 23, 2012 Posted October 23, 2012 Jealousy can be a disastrous thing when jealousy rears its ugly head. You may perceive it as immaturity and insecurity, but jealously is a powerful emotion when evoked. Jealously starts as a real or imagined threat to the relationship and this is why she acts the way she does, in response to suspicion of betrayal or as a reactive response, due to her past relationships or trust issues. She feels hurt and fears that any second, the relationship can be broken. From reading your situation, the advice I can give is to communicate. Ask her the reasons why she feels jealous when other girls are in the picture. Get down to the root of the problem and evaluate if there is reason behind her jealously. Was she cheated on in the past or does she have attachment issues? Or is her jealously the result of her being insecure? If her jealously is the result of her being insecure, I would do some activities to make her feel wanted and secure in the relationship. Do something special for her, plan a romantic evening or leave her little notes here and there to make her feel like she is the only one you love and that no other women can compare to the way she makes you feel; However if things don’t change, unfortunately it’s time to leave the relationship. If you do nothing to provoke her jealously, then you don’t deserve to be treated the way you do and you deserve to be happy. It will be hard to leave, but in the end, jealously is not an attractive quality in anyone and first and foremost, she is the only one that can change her ways and better herself, trust issues and insecurity and all.
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