Typical teenage problem.

[lifetaken]

Typical teenage problem.

Hi all. Warning, this is kinda long...

 

I'm 16, a guy, and I really, really like this girl. Now, before you go calling me a "stupid teenager" or something, please, just don't. I really need some help here.

 

So, around the beginning of August this year, this girl that I had liked for a few months that I was really close with told me she liked me. I kinda figured it, because we literally spent every day together (which really adds to the confusion later...) but I knew for sure that it was true now. So she told me, and I told her I really liked her too.

 

So, all happy, right? We start dating, and go from there, right?

 

Yeah. I wish.

 

She has had a boyfriend for exactly 2 years today (yeah, today is their anniversary and I still haven't given up...pretty sad huh?). And the thing is, she just simply won't break up with him for me. She has admitted that she wishes me and her could just be together so many times now. She just claims to be "unsure" and all of this crap. She has been saying this for the past month and a half and it's starting to get really old.

The thing that really confuses me is that we ACT like boyfriend and girlfriend! We hold hands, hug, all the rest except for sex (I do have some self respect). She still though, claims that she is so "unsure" and needs "time". So I asked her just last week whether I am waiting for something or nothing, and I told her that if it was something, it better be soon. She told me that it was "good for me", which I am assuming means that she will be over him "soon". We started talking again more (we had stopped for about a week when we tried becoming just "friends" which didn't work out at all) and everything was going great...

 

Then her homecoming dance came. Of course, she went with him. She had...gotten drunk to put it blatantly. She texted me the day after and said she did some "regretful" things. I never asked what those things were, I kinda regret not asking, but oh well.

 

This is where things start to go downhill.

 

Yesterday (I realize I said "today" above, I wrote the beginning of this yesterday) was their anniversary. Earlier that day she told me how much she missed seeing me and stuff. I suggested that we hang out, but she apparently had a sports game to go to (now, I'm not a fool. I now know she was with her boyfriend). She says we can hang out all night tonight. So I tell her good luck at her 'game' and for her to text me after and tell me how it went.

 

No text.

 

 

So today, I asked her about 4 hours ago how the game went.

 

 

Still no text.

 

I am, right now, about done with this little game of cat and mouse. This isn't the first time this has happened (her not responding to me). This happens for like for 2-3 days every 2 weeks or so. We go from talking all the time to me trying to have a conversation and her never responding (and don't tell me I am the one that needs to text first. I ALWAYS text first). Then, she tells me she misses me so much and "why did we stop talking". Yeah, it's like some sort of strategy now, some little game. But I'm sick of it. Yesterday we were talking like we were going to spend all night tonight with each other before I leave town all weekend, and now it's like I don't exist. It's getting annoying.

 

So...and this is what I've come to ask...

 

I have this message on my phone that I'm going to text her while she is asleep. It goes like:

"Hey, nice knowing you miss me so much yet can't take 10 seconds to text back. Goodnight ****

 

PS: Hope you had fun for your anniversary.

 

PPS: I'm starting to get mad. Sorry, can't hold this one back

 

<3"

 

I know, it sounds like a d**k thing to say, but I have been a nice guy about this situation for far, far too long. I feel like that would be a good thing to say just to let her know how truly pissed I am, but I don't know. Please, please please I'm begging, any advice? I don't want to screw things up, yet I do want to kind of show her how mad I am and sorta be an a-hole a little bit for once to show her I'm not some pushover.

 

Thanks so much guys. Sorry it was so long.

 

PS: I know she has gotten the message. iPhones show a "received" message when the other person receives the text. I'm not just "overreacting" any more. I'm seriously starting to get mad and am beginning to worry.

 

PPS: Anyone have any advice on the whole situation in general? I really don't want to give up. Every time I tell myself I'm over her and her games, I see her face just once and hug her just once and every little feeling I had for her comes right back. It sucks.

 

Thanks again, all.

[RickFox]

The most powerful thing you can say to her is NOTHNG.

 

Don't text it, don't send it, don't even write it bud.

 

If you send it, you aren't going to get the desired effect, she isn't going to care, and will probably have a nice chuckle at it since she'll get the idea that everything she does has an effect on you.

 

Just leave it alone, be done with her, waste no time with the games and move on. You will find a better girl who is into you and not someone else.

 

I know it's hard, you want that last word, you want her to know you're hurting, but let it be. Saying nothng says so much.

[veryhappy]

You are not a stupid teenager. It is that much harder for you because you are a teenager.

 

This girl is using you, and you are letting her do it because you want anything from her, any sort of interaction.

 

You are wasting your time. The only way of getting this girl is stopping hanginout with her, and telling her to let you know when she's available. As long as you're there for her, she'll be unsure.

 

Do not humiliate yourself ever to get somebody to love you and want you. Even if you get them, can you imagine the effort to keep them? I'm sure you'll find someone else you like pretty soon. Someone sure she wants to be with you.

Edited October 19, 2012 by cutedragon

[2sure]

She likes the attention she gets from you, probably more than she likes you.

You have been friend zoned, which women of all ages do. Nearly impossible to change that. If you pull back a little she will miss you just enough to pull you back right where she wants you.

 

If you really want to try, you have to pull back completely. Do not text her, do not call, etc. When she contacts you, be busy. Become unavailable, then become uninterested. Tell her that her BF seems like a good match for her. When you see her, say hello and move along.Be friendly but uninterested. I would think 2 weeks or a month for a 16 yo girl.

 

If she has any interest in you at all, there isn't much she won't do at that point to get your attention back.

[fleri]

Which age better for love because i am teenage men. image recognition . I am looking for a pitty women which is so cute but they are don't accept me.

Edited October 19, 2012 by fleri

[skywriter]

What you don't say, will say everything.

 

Silence is like cold steel....