blue_jay_bird Posted October 19, 2012 Posted October 19, 2012 I'm on a let's bash the Ex rant. Things they say: Ex: "At lest I didn't cheat on you" ( Is this suppose me make me feel better) Me: "Why didn't you talk to me about problem's in are relationship before you broke up with me?" "Because you always cry when i talk about problem's" ( I don't know how to understand this excuse) Me: "Why did you tell your best friend all the problem's in the relationship. i had to hear from his girlfriend, not from you how you really felt. " Him:"well i guess i'm not surprised those two are going to get married." (another excuses for how you behaved) I guess it's a good thing i can't remember more.
Calico Posted October 19, 2012 Posted October 19, 2012 Me: "Why didn't you talk to me about problem's in are relationship before you broke up with me?" "Because you always cry when i talk about problem's" ( I don't know how to understand this excuse) Because crying can come across as emotional blackmailing and it's not easy to deal with. More importantly, tears often mean that you hurt, and if you have been with someone for some time, they do care about you. They may not be happy in the relationship and they may not be in-love with you any more, but unless they are complete jerks they don't actually enjoy hurting you or seeing you hurt. If I cared about someone and they started to cry every time I brought up a problem, I'd sooner than later avoid these situations and keep my mouth shut. Other men may feel the same way. It doesn't mean they don't care, but the opposite.
Author blue_jay_bird Posted October 19, 2012 Author Posted October 19, 2012 It's not like i was crying to blackmail him. I still wish we could workout problems.
JustALittleBit Posted October 19, 2012 Posted October 19, 2012 I can understand the crying thing from this point of view, as Calico said, but I do agree that that's not really an excuse... and sadly if something upsets you I don't think you can help but cry. So I wouldn't feel bad about it, I think you just need to be with someone where there aren't so many problems so the crying isn't such an issue, because you can't change who you are.
jerba Posted October 19, 2012 Posted October 19, 2012 Mine had some real crazy ones: "If I didn't know better I'd think you didn't care about us" - This was after I was there for her every day for a week surrounding the 3 year anniversary of her ex's death (who she cheated on and he then committed suicide). The best part about this one is that shortly before this, she told me "If my ex was still alive I would gladly leave you to be available for him, even if he didn't want to be with me." I stupidly let this slide and gave her a second chance. She rectified that shortly after by breaking up with me. "We only work in person" - She said this when she broke up with me, which also happened to be the day she got back in state after spending 3 weeks outside of state for a program and we were finally able to see each other again. Needless to say, I haven't tried to contact her once since then. I still don't know the real reasons for the break up; just the day before this she was talking about starting birth control, among other things.
Sugarkane Posted October 19, 2012 Posted October 19, 2012 They can sure be full of BS. One ex told me he wanted to be single and later begged me back. I snooped on fb and he was already seeing someone else. If I had a way of letting her know he contacted me (I'm not on his friends list), I would've done it in a heart beat. My other ex dumped me completely our of the blue, by text after a year. Said I can't communicate. What a complete hypocrite. He refused to give me any closure.
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