threebyfate Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 :shrugs: I get what I want from life being entitled. What about you guys? Oh, it's not working for you? Funny that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
espec10001 Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 The F is wrong with guys today? As a man, I see it as a supreme advantage that I'm the initiator. In fact, like others have said, initiation is usually the best way for a girl to respond to you. Why is this? Well, I guess it's just nature. Yet, you guys seem to think it's a disadvantage! The hell is wrong with you?! Look, men have all sorts of advantages in this world. The very fact that men have the POWER to initiate and that even though the media will tell you men will bang anything with two legs, this is not true at all. Men CHOOSE to initiate with just like women CHOOSE who they'll respond to. Grow up! I'm not a Don Juan, but from personal experience I've had much better experiences when me as a male initiate because it just feels natural and I like it and so do they. Heck, the very fact that women want to work like men should tell you that in many ways they are jealous of certain qualities of men. I'm not bashing women, but a lot of guys on this forum forget the HUGE advantages men have over women! Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Some men assume the worst but I am sure some not so great things are running through women's minds when men try to talk to them. Some men just don't want to deal with being accused of street harassment and these days some consider simply smiling at a woman to be just that. Link to post Share on other sites
NoMoreJerks Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Some men assume the worst but I am sure some not so great things are running through women's minds when men try to talk to them. Some men just don't want to deal with being accused of street harassment and these days some consider simply smiling at a woman to be just that. OMG, you are EVER so wrong. If I didn't want to be talked to by a man, I would not be at the bar by myself, at 10:30pm. Seriously. Cheaper to drink at home, and listen to the music that I like instead of some of the crappy music they often play at bars. Talking to a woman is fine. Inappropriate attentions to her after you start talking to her? Not fine. But liek I said, I have never assumed, and will never assume, that a guy is trying to get into my "pants" if he starts a casual conversation with me, or whatever. I didn't assume it tonight when that guy talked to me about my tablet. No way, haha.You evidently don't know the difference between talking to a woman who has given all the signals that she wants to be talked to, and harassing a woman who has clearly indicated/or signaled that she does NOT wish to be bothered. Link to post Share on other sites
SJC2008 Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Many women don't put in an effort IMO and IME it's the ones who are average looking or better. They play games! There are 3 that I can use for an ex going back 20 months, 2 I met IRL. The first was the lady I posted about here and got tarred and feathered for. She took 3 days to return my 1st call, then couldt't talk, I was litereally saying f it until she texted saying she could talk. Mind you this was to ask for the first date. The second one I met IRL dropped off the face of the earth and calls back 2 weeks later saying she lost her phone! Sure you did, you weren't playing if he likes you hell call again were you? This was before the first date to. We texted/talked and I decided not to ask her out when I found out we practice different religions. The 3rd one was the one I eas crushing on. We went out 3 times and she never textexd! You don't have to call/text first after a date, that's my job. You don't have to intiate all the contact, just a little to show you're interested, that's all. That's effort. When women don't initiate it gives off a come to me vibe and there's no balance. Link to post Share on other sites
verhrzn Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 I don't know any man who would call a woman a slut for approaching. Let's just be honest and say that the women who are against approaching don't want to deal with rejection. That is what it boils down to. They sure have no problem breaking tons of other gender roles so why is this one so important? Happened to me. They assume you're easy and may react positively ('free pussy!') or negatively ('slut.') 1 Link to post Share on other sites
espec10001 Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Many women don't put in an effort IMO and IME it's the ones who are average looking or better. They play games! There are 3 that I can use for an ex going back 20 months, 2 I met IRL. The first was the lady I posted about here and got tarred and feathered for. She took 3 days to return my 1st call, then couldt't talk, I was litereally saying f it until she texted saying she could talk. Mind you this was to ask for the first date. The second one I met IRL dropped off the face of the earth and calls back 2 weeks later saying she lost her phone! Sure you did, you weren't playing if he likes you hell call again were you? This was before the first date to. We texted/talked and I decided not to ask her out when I found out we practice different religions. The 3rd one was the one I eas crushing on. We went out 3 times and she never textexd! You don't have to call/text first after a date, that's my job. You don't have to intiate all the contact, just a little to show you're interested, that's all. That's effort. When women don't initiate it gives off a come to me vibe and there's no balance. You got to find more mature women. A girl who likes you and wants to spend time with you isn't going to play games, and if she does, just FORGET about her. Seriously, if she takes 3 days to respond, number deleted. That's it. Move on, find another girl who isn't so immature. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 I have seen men simply smile at women in bars and get torn to shreds so maybe you won't do it but it does happen quite often. Link to post Share on other sites
NoMoreJerks Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 I often initiated contact when I was dating my ex. More often than he did, in fact... He was a lazy ******* who wanted me to put in all the effort , so that he could get... free sex. No respect for lazy men, to be honest. Grow a pair and do some work if you want a woman to have any respect for you. Link to post Share on other sites
NoMoreJerks Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 I have seen men simply smile at women in bars and get torn to shreds so maybe you won't do it but it does happen quite often. Bullcrap. You're either 1) coming up with a fake story to validate your point; 2) happened to come across a nutcase woman, hardly the norm. If she "tore" him to shreds, she would probably be kicked out of the bar and get a permban from there. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
AD1980 Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 u guys are whining over sour grapes. Grow a pair of balls and approach women who send you the right signals, instead of whining on an internet forum about how women don't approach you. Boohooohoooo. Women never send me anything that can remotely be seen as a signal so i dont approach Link to post Share on other sites
espec10001 Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 I have seen men simply smile at women in bars and get torn to shreds so maybe you won't do it but it does happen quite often. Dude, it's because its a BAR: a place where people get drunk. Ever see two drunk guys start brawling because one looked at the other funny? Yeah, it's the same deal with drunk men and women. Context, environment, timing...all that sort of thing... Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Bullcrap. You're either 1) coming up with a fake story to validate your point; 2) happened to come across a nutcase woman, hardly the norm. If she "tore" him to shreds, she would probably be kicked out of the bar and get a permban from there. I see it all the time where women get offended at men for simply thinking he had the right to speak to her. Link to post Share on other sites
NoMoreJerks Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Women never send me anything that can remotely be seen as a signal so i dont approach Maybe you have trouble understanding the signals women send. Maybe you haven't been going to the right bars (bars differ in terms of the crowds they attract). Maybe she wasn't by herself; a woman who is not on her own will find it hard to send signals. I know I do, when I am with friends, even if those friends are all female. Going "solo" is always a good idea if you want to meet men. That's what I've learned. If she was there alone and didn't send you signals, guess she just wasn't interested in you. She may have sent signals to other men. Link to post Share on other sites
NoMoreJerks Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 I see it all the time where women get offended at men for simply thinking he had the right to speak to her. Where do you hang out? In some snobbish bar? The right to speak to her? And she's alone at the bar? She must have issues, in which case, why do you think that's "representative" of women? I have always found it a compliment when a man has tried to talk to me, even when I wasn't interested in him. Link to post Share on other sites
AD1980 Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 , guess she just wasn't interested in you. She may have sent signals to other men. Oh im sure thats the case which once again is why i dont approach Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Where do you hang out? In some snobbish bar? The right to speak to her? And she's alone at the bar? She must have issues, in which case, why do you think that's "representative" of women? I have always found it a compliment when a man has tried to talk to me, even when I wasn't interested in him. I once saw a woman flip out on a man because she dropped her cell phone and didn't realize it and he picked it up to hand it to her. She accused him of only doint it to get in her pants. Link to post Share on other sites
NoMoreJerks Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 Oh im sure thats the case which once again is why i dont approach In which case, what's this rant about? That she wasn't attracted to you? Link to post Share on other sites
kiss_andmakeup Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 I am a shy girl. And yep, my BF did the initial approaching, asked for my number, called and asked me out, asked me out again, so on and so forth. I didn't really have to chase back (although I never played games like waiting days to respond to calls; I always responded promptly). I love my BF to pieces and think he's wonderful. We've been together for over a year. No beef here. What's my incentive to start approaching men, again? :D Link to post Share on other sites
NoMoreJerks Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 I once saw a woman flip out on a man because she dropped her cell phone and didn't realize it and he picked it up to hand it to her. She accused him of only doint it to get in her pants. You don't realize how ridiculous you sound when you claim that this woman is in any way representative of women in general. I have never seen or heard of such a thing happening. I don't know where you live, but if this is a recurrent phenomenon where you live, I don't think it's a healthy place to live in. Move somewhere else, and learn that there is more to the world than a few crazy insecure women. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
AD1980 Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 In which case, what's this rant about? That she wasn't attracted to you? No im sure the case most of the time is i get no signals because the women arent attracted to me which is why i rarely approach Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 OP, you have some valid points but it all boils down to us, meaning men. We teach women how to treat us by our actions and what we enable. It's really as simple as that. You or I 'take a stand' and some other testosterone driven two-leg pushes through to fill the hole. It's really no more complicated than that. We do it to ourselves. Accept it. Walk your path and do what you do and what happens, happens. Women will always and forever be who they are. For myself, marriage was huge teacher in that regard. Best to let it go, IMO. Good luck. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NoMoreJerks Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 No im sure the case most of the time is i get no signals because the women arent attracted to me which is why i rarely approach So they don't approach you because they're not attracted to you, right? But they would approach men they are attracted to. There is no universal rule that says women never approach. Also, there are good reasons why many women do not approach in a lot of cases. Link to post Share on other sites
kiss_andmakeup Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 OP, you have some valid points but it all boils down to us, meaning men. We teach women how to treat us by our actions and what we enable. It's really as simple as that. You or I 'take a stand' and some other testosterone driven two-leg pushes through to fill the hole. It's really no more complicated than that. We do it to ourselves. Accept it. Walk your path and do what you do and what happens, happens. Women will always and forever be who they are. For myself, marriage was huge teacher in that regard. Best to let it go, IMO. Good luck. Carhill, you always summarize things so eloquently. Good post. Link to post Share on other sites
AD1980 Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 So they don't approach you because they're not attracted to you, right? But they would approach men they are attracted to. There is no universal rule that says women never approach. Also, there are good reasons why many women do not approach in a lot of cases. Im just talking for myself as why i dont approach.I dont expect women to approach me since they are rarely attracted to me Link to post Share on other sites
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