Danb32 Posted October 18, 2012 Posted October 18, 2012 Hi everyone, After reading many books and researching, I've realized all this time (2 years) I've been overly nice to my girlfriend. As a result, she doesn't treat me like she used to, gets her own way all the time, and as a result I'm losing her interest, I can tell. Although now I know how to act, and how to come across which I am changing, I still get confused in some situations and was hoping someone could help. for example: *Were out shopping* Me - I wanna go in this shop here Her - Well I wanna go in this one first (At this point I'm stuck.) I know by giving in and agreeing with her she's getting her own way and walking over me again, but if I say 'no' I feel stubborn, and more than likely she will just get pissed off and go to her own shop on her own. This is just one example. What am I expected to do? I want her to gain respect for me again. At the beginning of our relationship she wouldn't dare shout at me like that. Thanks everyone.
Andy_K Posted October 18, 2012 Posted October 18, 2012 *Were out shopping* Me - I wanna go in this shop here Her - Well I wanna go in this one first You - Okay, I'll catch up with you. You're proposing a third solution which allows both of you to go in whichever shop you like first, and if she protests 'what? you're running off without me?' she's the one that will look petty and immature by being less accomodating than you. Alternatively, you're arguing about what so see at the cinema or where to eat. Suggest that you get to choose this time, and she does next week. Or vice versa. As an added bonus, because the compromise is 'your' idea, it will still feel like your plan is the one being followed, even when the outcome is 50/50. You'll feel much less trodden on and she'll feel less like she's got you wrapped round her finger. 1
InJest Posted October 18, 2012 Posted October 18, 2012 Stop paying so much attention to her. Start actively pursuing other women, and don't hide it. What you really have to do is to show her that you don't care about the relationship as much anymore. Stop hanging out with her as much. Stop doing little things for her. Start being a dick to her. Sounds counterintuitive, but it almost certainly will work.
James_2012 Posted October 18, 2012 Posted October 18, 2012 I'd say walk away, but it's up to you. She sounds high maintenance. Has she never heard of mutual agreement? It's unfair to expect you to do everything she wants.
liquid_amber Posted October 18, 2012 Posted October 18, 2012 Hi everyone, What am I expected to do? I want her to gain respect for me again. At the beginning of our relationship she wouldn't dare shout at me like that. Thanks everyone. don't tolerate it. if she starts to order you around or disrespect you in any way, walk away. don't respond right away when she calls or texts. let her get upset and freaked out and beg you for forgiveness. you have to stand your ground, though. do not give in.
JayL Posted October 19, 2012 Posted October 19, 2012 Hi everyone, After reading many books and researching, I've realized all this time (2 years) I've been overly nice to my girlfriend. As a result, she doesn't treat me like she used to, gets her own way all the time, and as a result I'm losing her interest, I can tell. Although now I know how to act, and how to come across which I am changing, I still get confused in some situations and was hoping someone could help. for example: *Were out shopping* Me - I wanna go in this shop here Her - Well I wanna go in this one first (At this point I'm stuck.) I know by giving in and agreeing with her she's getting her own way and walking over me again, but if I say 'no' I feel stubborn, and more than likely she will just get pissed off and go to her own shop on her own. This is just one example. What am I expected to do? I want her to gain respect for me again. At the beginning of our relationship she wouldn't dare shout at me like that. Thanks everyone. Strap your penis back on and put your backbone back on. Simple. Me - I wanna go in this shop here Her - Well I wanna go in this one first You said you're stuck? What I always did if I went shopping with an ex.. Me - I wanna go in this shop here Her - Well I wanna go in this one first Me - Okay, you go there and I'll go shop here and we'll meet after. It's either she agrees or she goes with you. Done!
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