No Contact/Limited Contact

[Am313]

It's been close to two months since my ex broke up with me. I'm ok, I miss her a lot at times but besides that I'm doing fine. In the gym like I used to, playing hockey like I used to, and working hard at my job. The past 4 weeks at work have been incredibly fulfilling.

 

So I'm here for advice:

 

Even though I'm doing fine I still hold on and catch myself thinking about her before I fall asleep. Imagining her with me kind of thing....I don't like it at all and I try to stop myself.*

 

I agreed to the breakup and it seemed to upset her. I've sent three texts since. One was a genuine apology that needed to be said about 2 weeks later and I didn't expect a response, so it was no skin off my back to send it.

 

The next one was me half drunkenly sending a picture of the clouds and moon. She responded the next morning with her picture of the clouds and moon "Much Better!".

 

A week later I sent a text about a song she played for me (Wanted by Hunter Hayes) when we were trying to work things out/Breaking up (I don't know what to call it. She dumped me, I walked away and then a week later she tried working things out but our emotions were too crazy so we split). I sent a recording of me playing a riff of the song on piano. The next morning she responded with a thank you but asking me to not text her so late because she has to get up really early and doesn't stay up so late anymore.*

 

Well, now I'm going complete NC and I've been avoiding our mutual hangout for a month. I've seen her twice there and it hasn't bothered me much but I really just don't want to be there right now.*

 

So, my question is: Does going to our mutual hangout at some point in the near future count as breaking no contact? I'm going there for me, not her. I may see her, I may not, but I miss that place.*

[Svet74]

i wouldnt say thats breaking NC. As long as your not talking to her. To avoid talking to her or ignore.

 

Me and my ex attend the same church, so i see him there. And his family still approach me. so does that count as breaking NC? i dont really think so

[geegirl]

Does going to our mutual hangout at some point in the near future count as breaking no contact? I'm going there for me, not her. I may see her, I may not, but I miss that place.*

 

You have to decide which is more important. Your emotional sanity or missing your favorite hang out spot.

[flitzanu]

and also you have to decide if you're doing it in hopes of seeing her. based on the desperation in your tone, it sounds like you subtly WANT to bump into her.

 

in that case, yes, it's breaking NC because you're trying to force seeing her. if it's even a 50/50 shot you're gonna run into her, then it sounds like you're tempting fate.