Kayterea Posted October 17, 2012 Posted October 17, 2012 Okay so me and my ex broke up about 2 months ago, we dated for 3 years. we tried to do NC but always fails after 3 days. He has told me on numerous occasions that he misses me and still loves me and made a mistake but when I bring it up later he tries to deny it or says he blames it on something else (being sick, drunk or half asleep) More recently I have been watching the dog we bought together because he has been out of town working, well he was out of town he would text me all day and then call me and talk to me for an hour every night, he would bring things up about how we were so good together and then asked me for dinner the night before he came back. We went on the date (he called it a date not me) an ha a great time we actually talked to eachother and enjoyed eachothers company when before we would have been on our phones the whole time. He payed a well. The next morning he called me and asked if I wanted to walk the dog with him we spent the entire day together. And since then we have hung out everyday. He went out of town again an said he will have Sunday off out of town and asked if I wanted to come and spend the night. What does he want from me? When I asked him what was going on he just said he wasnt ready to get back together.
geegirl Posted October 17, 2012 Posted October 17, 2012 Misses you, loves you and made a mistake, then he retracts. Wants you to spend the night but doesn't want to get back together. He wants the perks of a relationship without having to be in one. He gets to play fantasy with you, sleep with you, do fun things, get attention without the commitment. So he tells you upfront that he can't give you what you want, but if you want to play, you must have no expectations. Proceed at your own risk. He's giving you all the little crumbs you need to stay engaged, except what you really want. Time for you to wake up and be with someone that chooses to be with you rather than someone who blatantly tells you that he does not want what you want. And if you're always there to cater to his needs, he will never realize the value of you. It doesn't give him the opportunity to feel the loss of you. It doesn't give him the boot in the butt. It only enables this endless pattern of emotional unavailability.
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