amtz Posted October 17, 2012 Posted October 17, 2012 (edited) Don't know to call it a second chance or not but, I'll just vent since I really need to! My situation or my story is as follows: Had a nice relationship with a women older than me that lasted I would say like 4 months or so.. Life was good with her on my side just for the downside that she had awful insecurities from her past relationship! SO THERE WAS NO WAY that she could trust me 100% After so many issues regarding mistrust I decided to call it off! Although she did put up a fight willing to do anything so that we could stick together and work our differences, but I simply had enough! I may add that I was loyal to her all the way! So we kept on talking going out (NO SEX) just a friendly relationship till no contact what so ever... We bumped to each other every now and then and sustained a conversation asking for each others life whereabouts etc etc. Months passed and all of a sudden I just felt a great need in seeing her and telling her how much I missed her... It took me a couple of months till after enough alcohol in my blood my balls grew 10x more than normal and all of a sudden they had an extra layer of steel around them! I sent her an inbox msg and just vented! I even started apologizing for the inconvenience my late FB msg might of caused... She replied back telling me that how kind was I by sending her such a touching message and that waking up reading such beautiful lines made her day for the rest of the week... Afterwards I didn't really pushed on it, since I had sorta made my move. I pretty much stepped on the sideline and see the following days what would happen. WELL!! Nothing happened it was a done deal! She never replied after that first time even though I had sent a clear message with no subliminal lines in between... BUT... I didn't feel that bad! After all I was proud of my self since I had built up courage (with the help of alcohol) and contacted her! Any way back to topic! So a month later a friend of mine passed and she contacted me via FB expressing how sorry she was bla bla bla and that we had a meeting pending... Of course I was wrecked and had no intentions on working our differences in such a horrible moment in my life. I never really told her that, I just kept it to my self and replied that I was looking forward to that day when the right moment came.... Days later it turned out to be her birthday I wished her a happy birthday bla bla bla and she replied back thanking me and reminding me that WE HAD A MEETING PENDING TO FIGURE OUT OUR FUTURE.... I reminded her that I was more than willing to meet when ever she wanted AND AGAIN NO REPLY! TILL! A week back she send an inbox and REMINDED ME AGAIN that we should meet! To make a long story short... We added each other to our BB Messenger and chatted for hours... The weekend came by and we vented each others feelings through BB all of a sudden several days past till I saw her pass me in traffic and sent her a message "I think you drove right next to me" and then again talked for couple of minutes till she told me to wait for her..... TILL NOW NO MORE REPLY!! To be honest I don't feel wrecked or lonely... (I do but not devastated) I MISS HER SO MUCH and all this does confuse me, but I know that life goes-on and what wasn't meant to be simply wasn't.... Guess I'm more disappointed of all the expectations in getting back with her and have a fresh start! Probably I planned ahead for both of us not knowing it was going to back fire. Sometimes women are so difficult to understand! Thank you all for reading I REALLY NEEDED TO VENT! GOD BLEES ALL OF YOU Edited October 17, 2012 by amtz
carhill Posted October 17, 2012 Posted October 17, 2012 Women are hard to understand That's the first step in understanding women. Live for today. With many/most women, tomorrow is really an unknown. Deal with what's in front of you at the moment. If it works now, that. If not, move on. Each day is a new day and a new 'understanding'. Good luck. 3
threebyfate Posted October 17, 2012 Posted October 17, 2012 Without knowing the backstory of your relationship dynamics, it's difficult to say. But one thing I did notice is that you're quite passive. Is she waiting for you to take more initiative?
Author amtz Posted October 18, 2012 Author Posted October 18, 2012 I'm trying to be calm since I don't want to screw things up! No clear signals from her part... With women I'm a ball player a guy that can easily get a women to bed, but with her I just act passive... At least for now... Although I would be better to be in NC if this is going to continue at least I wouldn't feel ignored. Thank you all for reading
Eddie Edirol Posted October 18, 2012 Posted October 18, 2012 Youre giving her all the power to play with you. YOu gave her time to get over you, and she doesnt need your attention anymore. She is probably seeing someone and isnt sure about the guy, so she is toying with you, keeping you on the hook. But if she is toying with you, she probably talked herself out of any good reasons to start seeing you again, and is getting revenge on you fro breaking her heart in the first place. If she is older than you, she knows how to deal with getting dumped, and she has dumped people, and will continue to tell you she wants to arrange a meet but flake on you until you go away. She probably just doesnt want to say no shes moved on. So you will have to put your foot down and tell her either she meets with you in person to talk about you two, or she is to not contact you ever again, and you are moving on.
threebyfate Posted October 18, 2012 Posted October 18, 2012 I'm trying to be calm since I don't want to screw things up! No clear signals from her part... With women I'm a ball player a guy that can easily get a women to bed, but with her I just act passive... At least for now... Although I would be better to be in NC if this is going to continue at least I wouldn't feel ignored. Thank you all for readingHow's being passive working for you?
Author amtz Posted October 19, 2012 Author Posted October 19, 2012 Being an ex military you are trained to think before acting... Not doing this can get you killed ASAP! It has worked wonders for me in real life scenario! In the past I would off simply told her to piss off! Today she pulled it again! We AGREED TO MEET IN PERSON TODAY! And was called off in the last minute! If it wasn't for me calling her to meet up I wouldn't never known she was in a "family dinner"... Like someone said.... It's time to smell the coffee and move on NOT ALONG WITH! Thanks for you all support!! Reading you'll post and others experience make me feel that I'm not alone in this mess. GOD BLESS!
carhill Posted October 19, 2012 Posted October 19, 2012 Right, and tomorrow is a new day. Say a little thanks for that and then move on to other opportunities in life. People are, overwhelmingly, transitory. Perhaps a couple will rise above transitory and become consistent parts of your life. Hopefully it'll be a long life.
Sugarkane Posted October 19, 2012 Posted October 19, 2012 I also want to know how men can fake a whole relationship?
moveONorStay Posted October 19, 2012 Posted October 19, 2012 I also want to know how men can fake a whole relationship? This is a fairly random and sweeping statement!! I think both sexes are capable of stringing a relationship along. It's really not fair.
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