situation with my ex

[MartinH]

I was with a girl for a year and a half we had it all planned marraige kids the lot but we split up. I begged her back but she was having none of it so I stayed away as much as I could. We met up last night to catch up and I told her I'm dating she seemed genuinely happy for me, deep down its her I want back but she told me it will never happen. And o ce she meets someone our friendship will also be over. I told her well lets end the friendship now cause it will end eventually anyway and she back tracked and said no actually we should be friends no matter what. I still love her and she knows this. But I don't know what to do. When I got home last night she said she would like to see me again maybe at Christmas. But is this just going to prolong my healing process? Should I meet her again at Christmas or should I just try to end this friendship now cause I clearly still love her

[River Rain]

I was with a girl for a year and a half we had it all planned marraige kids the lot but we split up. I begged her back but she was having none of it so I stayed away as much as I could. We met up last night to catch up and I told her I'm dating she seemed genuinely happy for me, deep down its her I want back but she told me it will never happen. And o ce she meets someone our friendship will also be over. I told her well lets end the friendship now cause it will end eventually anyway and she back tracked and said no actually we should be friends no matter what. I still love her and she knows this. But I don't know what to do. When I got home last night she said she would like to see me again maybe at Christmas. But is this just going to prolong my healing process? Should I meet her again at Christmas or should I just try to end this friendship now cause I clearly still love her

 

She made it obvious that's it's over for good...I would stop contact to be honest. Of course you still love her, but in my own experience, continuing the contact keeps that hurt in the moment. I went nc with my ex and he kept trying to contact me, telling me he cared, he wanted to be friends, then maybe we could get back together, then silence again. I let this happen far too long, and it kept that wound open. I wouldn't make plans to see each other at Christmas. Maybe down the line when you've healed and moved on, found a new girlfriend, then you can be friends, but I don't think it's a good thing. Sorry you're hurting. Keep posting here though, everyone here helped me so much to go through my grieving, and the advice given is all based on experience. Sometimes our heart blocks our brains when it comes to love and breakups!

[KathyM]

I think you should tell her you're not interested in a friendship with her. She basically told you that you are not good enough to be romantically involved with, so why would your ego tolerate being strung along like this on iffy friendship terms. Don't accept these crumbs, and let her know you are not interested in just a friendship, so you are ending contact.

[Chi townD]

If you still have romantic feelings for her still, then you don't need to be in a friendship right now. And it's not being fair to the girl that you're dating if you can't give her 100% of yourself.