irc333 Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 Met a few local ladies (for a change) online, we had been emailing back and forth a few times, until I talk about exchanging phone numbers. They'd answer my email, but "overlook" the fact that I've even asked that. For example: Me: "Good morning, how was your week? I had a pretty busy work week, and had a nice time going hiking and out dancing with friends last night, anyhow, I was wondering if we could exchange numbers and make an arrangement to talk?" Her: "My week is doing pretty well, I just came back from the gym, read 2 chapters of my book, and now getting ready to take a shower,....what kind of plans do you have this weekend?" She ignored the phone # part. I have had this happen quite a few times....do women have a "Blindspot"? Lol
TigerCub Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 That is weird. and annoying. I don't see what the big deal is about moving to the next mode of communication. Do you think that maybe they are interested in having a messaging buddy rather than having it go further?
KathyM Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 I think some people aren't comfortable exchanging phone numbers until they've gotten to know you better through Emails. Or it could be that they are not interested, but don't know how to turn you down nicely. I think if a few weeks have gone by with Emailing and they are still evading, it's safe to assume they are either not interested but don't know how to turn you down nicely, or they are too much on the fence about you and it would take too long to get to the dating stage, either of which it's best to cut your time losses with them, and stop contacting them. I wouldn't give it more than a few weeks if you haven't gotten the number by then. I think it's good to ask for the number early on, but some people are not comfortable giving it out until they've gotten to know you better through Emails first. If they evade, then ask again after a couple of weeks, but I wouldn't invest more than three weeks total before getting a number.
Author irc333 Posted October 16, 2012 Author Posted October 16, 2012 (edited) That is weird. and annoying. I don't see what the big deal is about moving to the next mode of communication. Do you think that maybe they are interested in having a messaging buddy rather than having it go further? Okay, here's what's been happening so far....I've probably gotten the most responses the past month from women IN my local area (kind of a shocker) One seemed to show geniuine interest in getting to know me...she even replied with her response...and ended the sentence with, ".....if you are still interested...let me know" I guess she said something more of herself, and figured if I wanted to STILL move foward or not. It's kind of a shame, because some live within minutes of a place we could grab a bit or drink. The closer they live, the sooner the better...3 weeks is too long, I give them a week, esp, if emails have been going back and forth daily THen , all of a sudden her pic is removed from her profile...and she had RE-written something else. "I can't seem to delete this DAMN profile! I can't figure out how, and it's ticking me off, because I do NOT want to be a part of this anymore!! She said: "I do not want 3 times the views!" With POF you can SEE who viewed your profile...and I find it odd that she is bothered by people just LOOKING at her profile? I tend to wonder if some have boyfriends that they are on the "outs" with. Edited October 16, 2012 by irc333
TigerCub Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 Okay, here's what's been happening so far....I've probably gotten the most responses the past month from women IN my local area (kind of a shocker) One seemed to show geniuine interest in getting to know me...she even replied with her response...and ended the sentence with, ".....if you are still interested...let me know" I guess she said something more of herself, and figured if I wanted to STILL move foward or not. It's kind of a shame, because some live within minutes of a place we could grab a bit or drink. The closer they live, the sooner the better...3 weeks is too long, I give them a week, esp, if emails have been going back and forth daily THen , all of a sudden her pic is removed from her profile...and she had RE-written something else. "I can't seem to delete this DAMN profile! I can't figure out how, and it's ticking me off, because I do NOT want to be a part of this anymore!! She said: "I do not want 3 times the views!" With POF you can SEE who viewed your profile...and I find it odd that she is bothered by people just LOOKING at her profile? I tend to wonder if some have boyfriends that they are on the "outs" with. I think rewriting the profile is a definite sign that she's still trying to meet other people and that she's gonna try a different approach. Bitching about people seeing her profile is just silly and she needs to grow the **** up. hmmm however...maybe she's getting a lot of responses from people and they are just commenting on her looks and nothing more, so that's why she's removing the pic. Either way...3 weeks is too long and dragging things out especially if you were talking on the daily. I agree with you on that one. It must be frustrating. Maybe she has a good reason, who knows, but it does for sure make her seem kinda flaky. Or she could just not be interested and doesn't know how to let be honest and let people down gently - if that's the case, then on to the next!
Author irc333 Posted October 16, 2012 Author Posted October 16, 2012 Either way...3 weeks is too long and dragging things out especially if you were talking on the daily. I agree with you on that one. It must be frustrating. Maybe she has a good reason, who knows, but it does for sure make her seem kinda flaky. Or she could just not be interested and doesn't know how to let be honest and let people down gently - if that's the case, then on to the next Probably, yeah some say they'd wait a few weeks, but what's the point if your emails are 3 or 4 times through out the day for the first week..that's like a dozen emails. LOL And living within minutes, and still not comfortable to meet yet? Kinda wierd. I had a woman contact ME for a change once....same thing happened, THIS time we took it to the phone....then when I suggested meeting up..*Poof* she disappeared.
oaks Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 Met a few local ladies (for a change) online, we had been emailing back and forth a few times, until I talk about exchanging phone numbers. They'd answer my email, but "overlook" the fact that I've even asked that. Yes, I've had this plenty of times, or if I try to skip the phone number bit and go straight for asking to meet they ignore that, too. It's usually my cue to ignore them straight back - I'm not looking for a pen-pal and there are more responsive women to talk to (and meet).
suladas Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 Instead of asking, give them yours. Never failed for me yet.
Author irc333 Posted October 17, 2012 Author Posted October 17, 2012 Instead of asking, give them yours. Never failed for me yet. Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt, ignored. That's why I say "Would you like to EXCHANGE" phone numbers, that way we both have each others. BUT ANY mention of a phone conversation, they go into hiding...so it's all MOOT. They just prefer to keep it "pen pals only"
suladas Posted October 17, 2012 Posted October 17, 2012 That's weird. Just saying generally online they seem to like when you give them the power to make the choice. Have you actually said something like "Would you like to pursue this outside of the site so it's easier to talk my number is xxx-xxxx" or something like that. Big difference if you are just asking to exchange numbers in my opinion. Don't even have to mention a phone call, that way with your number they can just text you.
yongyong Posted October 17, 2012 Posted October 17, 2012 first of all, you don't say I did this and that without her asking first. it sounds creepy. just have normal conversation back and forth and you should act like you don't care about getting her #. when you feel like you had enough conversation and she has interest on you. you can ask her how about doing this. if she is ok with it, ask her number so you guys can set up the time. If you just give out number, most girls won't txt you first because of their ego and unless you are the very special one. ('this another guy with similar looks, asked my # like a gentleman and he is planning to take me out to the restaurant. why should I contact this guy first like I am chasing him?? LOL')
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