JimmyB26 Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 I'll keep it short and simple - started seeing a girl in her midtwenties this summer. I'm in my early thirties. Really hit it off. She was kind of flaky, but had one family issue after another come up. We were intimate, then she said that timing was just bad and we had to stop, after about a month. She texted me telling me that she missed me a couple of weeks later. I went on seeing other people. A couple of weeks after that, we decide to try it again. She flaked a couple of times, but I really didn't mind because the plans involved meeting me at work and I had a ton of work to do. Finally, after just leaning back, she started pursuing me a little bit and we went out about two weeks ago. She showed up at a happy hour I was at, met some of my friends, and then we went out. It looked and sounded like she was over whatever was bothering her. She paid for dinner, kissed me, got up and said she was going to use the bathroom, and bailed. When I finally figured it out five minutes later, and was walking out, I start getting texts from her saying "I'm in love with you...I'm lost...I'm confused...I wasn't planning on this, but I fell in love, and I'm afraid." Would she have said this if she didn't mean it? She apologized the following night. She was leaving on a trip anyway that was taking her out of the country for a month. I've heard from her by email a couple of times this month so far. She's clearing her head and finding herself, and she wants her confident and independent self back that I guess she's lost over time, and seems very apologetic that she can't come to an event I'm running this weekend that she originally said she could be at. She's backed off the "love" comments and is now concluding her messages with "Best wishes." I've reciprocated as best I can to someone who's out of the country, and been supportive - I'm just not sure of the next step when she's back at the end of the month.
truth_seeker Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 Honestly man, this chick is nuts! Very unstable and not running on all cylinders. Hopefully, when she leaves the country, she doesn't come back and find you again.
JayL Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 I'll keep it short and simple - started seeing a girl in her midtwenties this summer. I'm in my early thirties. Really hit it off. She was kind of flaky, but had one family issue after another come up. We were intimate, then she said that timing was just bad and we had to stop, after about a month. She texted me telling me that she missed me a couple of weeks later. I went on seeing other people. A couple of weeks after that, we decide to try it again. She flaked a couple of times, but I really didn't mind because the plans involved meeting me at work and I had a ton of work to do. Finally, after just leaning back, she started pursuing me a little bit and we went out about two weeks ago. She showed up at a happy hour I was at, met some of my friends, and then we went out. It looked and sounded like she was over whatever was bothering her. She paid for dinner, kissed me, got up and said she was going to use the bathroom, and bailed. When I finally figured it out five minutes later, and was walking out, I start getting texts from her saying "I'm in love with you...I'm lost...I'm confused...I wasn't planning on this, but I fell in love, and I'm afraid." Would she have said this if she didn't mean it? She apologized the following night. She was leaving on a trip anyway that was taking her out of the country for a month. I've heard from her by email a couple of times this month so far. She's clearing her head and finding herself, and she wants her confident and independent self back that I guess she's lost over time, and seems very apologetic that she can't come to an event I'm running this weekend that she originally said she could be at. She's backed off the "love" comments and is now concluding her messages with "Best wishes." I've reciprocated as best I can to someone who's out of the country, and been supportive - I'm just not sure of the next step when she's back at the end of the month. Sounds like my ex-girlfriend who I was with for 1 1/2 months. First 2 weeks = We're going too fast. 3rd to 5th week = I like you, I miss you, invited me for meals to join her family etc. , sex left, right and centre. beginning of 6th week = I was never sure about what I feel for you and I think it's unfair for you. I said I'll walk away. Mid of 6th week = long message early in the morning of her saying just give her time to figure things out, that she wanted to be with me blah blah beginning of 7th week = cold, emotionless, b*tch. when I asked what's up? She was acting weird. We broke up. I told her I feel that I'm being strung along by her hot and cold approach... Note : You are being strung along by an emotionally unstable woman. RUN! It seems very common as my ex is in her mid 20's too.
Mycteria Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 She said she was going to the bathroom and then ditched you? I'm sorry, but that is ridiculous. She is crazy. 1
Author JimmyB26 Posted October 15, 2012 Author Posted October 15, 2012 Thanks for the advice. I'm just going to sit back and let her come to me. I know I'll hear from her again once she gets back to the states, but I'm not going to settle for anything less than the relationship that I want - if she's in love with me, she shouldn't have any trouble showing that in her actions. I hate to say it, but what she really may need to propel her to act is to lose me to someone else if even only for a little while. I don't plan on using anyone specifically for that purpose, but I've got other women interested, and she might just need that extra push and fear of loss to get her to advance.
colombiana28 Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 LOL she might declare her love for you but the crazy won't stop, this i can assure you. 1
truth_seeker Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 Thanks for the advice. I'm just going to sit back and let her come to me. I know I'll hear from her again once she gets back to the states, but I'm not going to settle for anything less than the relationship that I want - if she's in love with me, she shouldn't have any trouble showing that in her actions. I hate to say it, but what she really may need to propel her to act is to lose me to someone else if even only for a little while. I don't plan on using anyone specifically for that purpose, but I've got other women interested, and she might just need that extra push and fear of loss to get her to advance. The worst thing you can do is fall in love with a nutcase. Don't do it! That's right up there with falling in love with an exotic dancer. She will mess with your head and your heart. STAY AWAY!!!!!
Author JimmyB26 Posted October 15, 2012 Author Posted October 15, 2012 I know she seems crazy, but she's got her reasons. And they're big ones. She's been through stuff. Serious stuff. I won't make excuses for her, because she's got stuff to answer for. I just read a golden response for the next time she wants to see me - just simply respond, "Why?"
ArtfulDodger Posted October 18, 2012 Posted October 18, 2012 The game of having her ‘loose me to someone else, if even only for a little while’ seems like some ploy just to exert power over the situation, or presumed power. Forcimg her hand accompishes what? Women, we are all cazy. It’s the level of how much of crazy which determines who you invest time with or don’t.
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