What in the actual ****, ex ruined my bday after 2 months NC

[heartbroken1357]

to cut a long story short, my ex of two year's left me a week after a holiday and got with a guy i played football with and was in my own friendship group. she swore down on her life it wasn't a case of her leaving me for him, but that i pushed her away..

 

it's been 3 month's since she left me out of the blue and led me on and lied and started dating him within a matter of week's i instantly went NC it's been 2 month's it was a VERY messy breakup, and she was a total bitch to me, it's like i never knew her, i begged pleaded, hounded chased done everything i shouldn't of done.

 

I've been off work since, i think about her every minute of everyday, I've had counseling, anti depressant's you name it it's just getting worse and worse each day, i miss her so much despite everything my love for her is unconditional.

 

It was my Birthday the weekend just gone, I invited all my family and friends out and they deliberately decided that they would come out too as they are also mutual friends with everyone, i completely blanked them all night, and all my friends told them not to ruin my night and leave it at that.

 

I got absolutely wasted, I got with one of the girl's in our friendship group who my ex happnes to know, the girl actually despises her, I actually feel so bad about it, I don't know why after what she's put me through, as it makes me a bit of a hypocrite now, it wasn't to get back at her or anything, but my EX blew her lid, went nut's started crying and asking what we did together, and wanted to talk to me, i flat our refused, and said i didn't want to speak to her, her BF even said i dont want you talking to him, even though she said she wanted too.. the whole night she kept looking at me, and deliberately saying things to get my attention, yet she told everyone she doesn't care what i do, as i went to leave she opened the car door crying saying she want's all this to stop, , i have no idea what she means by that as i haven't spoke to her in 2 months! a fight then broke out between my family and them even though we've known each other for years(they started it) obviously everyone pulled each other apart, and it calmed down

 

it was horrible to see her, im back to square one now, I've had a couple of girls ask me out and spend time with them dates, etc.. but it just doesn't feel right, its so awkward and it makes me feel even worse when i get home.

 

I just cant contemplate how she could move on so fast and not feel anything, she showed complete lack of respect for our relationship and my feeling's and i just wish i could hate her, I've dated people before and had relationships but this girl means so much to me, I've never experienced a feeling that i share with her and I just don't want her to dissapear out of my life forever, iv'e gone by the advice of LS and other sources to go NC, but it's going against everything I believe in.

 

it's also so hard as me and my brothers are all in the same friendship group, as she is best friend's with my cousin, and her best friend also dates my brother, it's one huge mess, i hate them for what they have done to me, but they want to be friend's how can i possibly be friends with them after this, as much as i want to be, i wont be taken for a mug anymore then i already have, how can i possibly forgive them for what they have done?

 

so fed up LS!!

Edited October 15, 2012 by heartbroken1357

[Chi townD]

Yeah, okay.... she's didn't leave you for him...yet, a week after she broke up with you, she's with him and it's your fault because YOU pushed her away. That's called blameshifting. Girls don't hook up with someone else that quickly if there wasn't something going on in the first place. SO!!! You're making yourself sick over a girl that was cheating on you.

 

Now, you need to change yourself. You need to find new hobbies that will expose you to different people. There's nothing wrong with your current friends. But, if they are closely associated with your Ex, then I think that you need to remove yourself from their lives for a while until you get a handle on your life.

 

Her reaction to finding out that you took solace with another girl is nothing new. She doesn't want to be with you, but she doesn't want you to be with anyone else. Weird, but it happens and it's selfish. She wanted you waiting on the sidelines and be her "back-up plan".

 

 

NC and start removing yourself from those friends for a while. Time to heal. Don't put yourself in a situation where you'll be around them.

[yessy21]

She is selfish. why was she there? she has no right and thats just disrespectful of your family adn friends to let her come. she needs to move on because she made her choice. now she needs to live with it.

 

she had something with that guy.

waste your energy on a better person.

one who wont cheat on you. You know what will make her feel like CACA. when you find a woman thats worth more than her in moral value.