iris219 Posted October 14, 2012 Posted October 14, 2012 I'm trying to buy a house and there's one I'd like to look at in my ex's neighborhood. Should I even bother looking at it? It's a really good price and has all the elements I'm looking for in a house. Would you feel weird living down the street from an ex?
mammasita Posted October 14, 2012 Posted October 14, 2012 Depends on if you're over him or not, then again, I don't think I would do it. He might think you're a stalker lol
Author iris219 Posted October 14, 2012 Author Posted October 14, 2012 I'm over him. I'm mostly concerned that he would think I was crazy. I wouldn't want to give him the satisfaction of thinking that I'm stalking him! I live near him now, just not right down the street. Anywhere I move will be close to him.
january2011 Posted October 14, 2012 Posted October 14, 2012 Would you buy a house in your ex's neighborhood? No. Would you feel weird living down the street from an ex? Yes. Anywhere I move will be close to him. Not strictly true.
Author iris219 Posted October 14, 2012 Author Posted October 14, 2012 Anywhere I move will be close to him. Not strictly true. I live in a certain area of town and I plan to buy in this area. The only other options in my town are the suburbs and a rural part outside of town. I'm not sure which one of those is worse, so we will always live in the same vicinity (a 5 mile radius). I was about to email my real estate agent, but maybe I shouldn't look at the house. I'm afraid I'll really like it. The frustrating thing is that I've looked at SO many houses and I'm having trouble coming up with a down payment, but this one is cheap enough that I could easily do so and it looks really nice.
suladas Posted October 14, 2012 Posted October 14, 2012 I live next door to mine, if I had a choice I wouldn't, I'm sure it could be normal again but not without a lot of time and effort. It depends how close if its at least a block away who really cares? You'll probably never see them. I wouldn't pass up a really good house just because of them, but I'd make it a factor in the decision.
amaysngrace Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 I run into my ex way more than I want to and we live three blocks away. There is no way I'd ever live on his street. Three blocks is too close already.
january2011 Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 I live in a certain area of town and I plan to buy in this area. The only other options in my town are the suburbs and a rural part outside of town. I'm not sure which one of those is worse, so we will always live in the same vicinity (a 5 mile radius). I was about to email my real estate agent, but maybe I shouldn't look at the house. I'm afraid I'll really like it. The frustrating thing is that I've looked at SO many houses and I'm having trouble coming up with a down payment, but this one is cheap enough that I could easily do so and it looks really nice. What I meant by my comment is that, "the world is a big place."
Author iris219 Posted October 15, 2012 Author Posted October 15, 2012 I live next door to mine, if I had a choice I wouldn't, I'm sure it could be normal again but not without a lot of time and effort. It depends how close if its at least a block away who really cares? You'll probably never see them. I wouldn't pass up a really good house just because of them, but I'd make it a factor in the decision. That sounds difficult. I'm sorry to hear you have to live next door to each other. A couple of houses are available on my ex's street, but I didn't consider them (for a few reasons, not just because they are on his street). The one I like is on different street, so it's around a corner. We wouldn't see each other if we sat on the porch or anything. I'd like to ask him how he feels about this, but we don't speak (that probably tells me how he'd feel ).
suladas Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 That sounds difficult. I'm sorry to hear you have to live next door to each other. A couple of houses are available on my ex's street, but I didn't consider them (for a few reasons, not just because they are on his street). The one I like is on different street, so it's around a corner. We wouldn't see each other if we sat on the porch or anything. I'd like to ask him how he feels about this, but we don't speak (that probably tells me how he'd feel ). It was as much my fault as hers, it was our choice to date knowing we lived next door. It was really difficult but 3 months later its not that bad. I'm sure after the winter were everyone hides inside, next spring it will be pretty much normal. I would avoid the same street for sure. Not sure if its a good idea to ask them what they think or not, likely not if you aren't on speaking terms now.
phineas Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 I don't do the neighbor thing. I've lived here for 12 yrs & i'm not even sure what their names are. The last woman I dated did though. LOL! I really don't see the problem here at all.
Author iris219 Posted October 15, 2012 Author Posted October 15, 2012 I don't do the neighbor thing. I've lived here for 12 yrs & i'm not even sure what their names are. The last woman I dated did though. LOL! I really don't see the problem here at all. So you wouldn't think your ex was crazy if she moved next door to you?
Emilia Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 one of my exes owns two flats in the building I live in. His company developed the property and he has tenants living there. Makes no difference, I never even think about it. One of his flats is directly above mine *shrug*
phineas Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 So you wouldn't think your ex was crazy if she moved next door to you? My ex-wife IS crazy. I already thought she was crazy when I kicked her out. Moving down the road from me would actually be a sane idea instead of driving 45 mins one-way to drop the kids off at school. I honestly can't think of a single person I dated (even the one's who led me on & cheated on me) that i'd care if they moved to my neighborhood. Hell, I work with a chick that wasted 2 months of my time & honestly just don't care. As long as they don't come knocking at my door. Then i'll have to get the garden hose like I do when the bible thumpers come a knocking & won't get off the porch until I answer the door. 1
HeldbyGravity Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 I wouldn't. It's not that I'm not over him, I'd just feel awkward.
carhill Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 Would you feel weird living down the street from an ex? Wouldn't bother me, and I did in fact make an offer (unsuccessful) on a rehab right up the street from my exW, so I would've been working there for a good six months or so in plain view of her and her boyfriend. I also entertained buying her house from her but thought that a bit over the top since the neighborhood had declined in value since I bought it prior to our D. I offered her BF a job, which they declined. Caring less works
suladas Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 I don't do the neighbor thing. I've lived here for 12 yrs & i'm not even sure what their names are. The last woman I dated did though. LOL! I really don't see the problem here at all. She came onto me for months, I didn't really think about it, I would of never made the first move. Plus I figured she was always super nice and if it didn't work out the split would probably be mutual and we'd just go back to being neighbors. Didn't exactly work out like that, but whatever. I'm just use to different, before moving out on my own I lived in the same place for nearly 22 years and grew up on that street. I knew everyone, and had been in pretty much every house and am friends with plenty of them still. So not being friendly with neighbors is a bit different to me.
suladas Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 I think a lot would depend on how they handled the BU and how they acted after. If they were still decent, it might not be to bad? Although my BU wasn't heated or nasty, there's still some hard feelings there. But then again it's only been 3 months. In like a year from now, I am pretty sure I won't careless.
phineas Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 She came onto me for months, I didn't really think about it, I would of never made the first move. Plus I figured she was always super nice and if it didn't work out the split would probably be mutual and we'd just go back to being neighbors. Didn't exactly work out like that, but whatever. I'm just use to different, before moving out on my own I lived in the same place for nearly 22 years and grew up on that street. I knew everyone, and had been in pretty much every house and am friends with plenty of them still. So not being friendly with neighbors is a bit different to me. Growing up on the street & moving to a different location are two different things.
phineas Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 I think a lot would depend on how they handled the BU and how they acted after. If they were still decent, it might not be to bad? Although my BU wasn't heated or nasty, there's still some hard feelings there. But then again it's only been 3 months. In like a year from now, I am pretty sure I won't careless. What exactly does anyone expect to happen? Who would actually base a major life decision such as purchasing / not purchasing a home because of what an ex might think? Is this an actual serious discussion? Think about it.
Recommended Posts