Are introverted otaku girls like this? whats next? I'm lost.

[Kokoro-Fan]

Last year I asked this introverted, otaku girl out (otaku = very into gaming, anime, etc.). She never initiated conversation with anyone but if you spoke to her, she'd talk. I did most of the talking when I initiated conversations with her and they ended up being extremely short and sometimes awkward. So yeah, eventually I asked her out, she said yes (huge shocker) and nothing came out of it. For some reason, I took it the wrong way that she still wouldn't initiate conversations and didn't reply to another text message I sent (she only replied to 1), so I gave up completely and instantly.

 

A year later: present time. I have classes with her. It was awkward for me at first because I never moved on. I avoided eye contact and everything with her. I kept thinking of ways to talk to her but nothing. Then things started getting a little less awkward for me. Class is all about team work and we had to be around each other a lot but still we didn't talk or anything.

 

Until recently. I found an opportunity to talk to her. Let me explain: since class started, we always 'street pass' each other. Street pass is a neat feature on the 3DS that exchanges information (avatar, profile, etc.) with other 3DS users near you. We are the only people in our classes that have one. After a couple of weeks, she rated my 3DS avatar. I got the prompt on my 3DS and I got happy. This could mean many things right? Do you guys think she meant something? For one, she didn't have to rate at all (I didn't to avoid awkwardness).

 

So that week I decided to talk to her and I did it after class. It was very short and straight to the point mainly. I told her I noticed she plays X game and if I could add her. So we both added each other. I can't read girls (especially her) but I don't know, it felt like she didn't want to talk? LIke when I started talking, she smiled and looked down. I'm not sure how to describe the smile though.

 

So that weekend I used the 3DS' messaging feature. I wrote her a message saying thanks for adding me and that I really like her art work. I also attached a little drawing I made of kirby. She replied back saying no problem and thanks as well; she included a drawing of a character she created.

 

But yeah this week, I couldn't figure out how to talk to her or anything. There was a moment in class where we stood right next to each other but neither one of us said a word. I really don't know what to say to her. If I went on a date with her then I'd feel more comfortable talking. I don't know if its normal for a girl like her to be this way, if shes interested or not which is why she's being really shy, or anything. Its driving me crazy.

 

Which brings up another thing, would it still be a good idea to ask her out to the movies despite not really interacting with her at school? I plan on saying hi and things like that though. I also plan on playing 3DS with her online and maybe using 3DS as a way to talk to her more. Maybe messaging her as well (but I will ask her out in person of course).

 

I admit, I'm shy around girls I like but that disappears after a short while. But its different with this girl. Maybe its because she doesn't talk much. I'm afraid we'll have no chemistry at all and makes me very sad. That sucks because I really like her and want to get to know her more. She's like my dream girl. We're also into the game things like gaming, anime, etc. Maybe she just needs to trust me? She has to know I like her right? I asked her out last year.

 

But yeah, what do you guys think? I'm really lost here. I'd hate to be heart broken again but at the same time I really need to get this off my chest. I scrwed up last year and I'm happy to see her again. I was waiting for this moment. Any advice would be appreciated. I want to give up but I simply can't. I don't even know how and will continue trying until I get a real answer (rejection or I end up going out with her). Oh and is it a problem if I look like a tough guy? Everyone thinks I'm a little intimidating because I look like a rocker but when people get to know me, they consider me one of the nicest persons they've met. Plus I've been pretty shy to this girl.

Edited October 14, 2012 by Kokoro-Fan
added details

[Arabella]

Jesus. I'm a gamer girl, and your post still managed to give me heartburn.

 

For pete's sake, stop playing games with her and ask her out already. But don't say "Hey would you like to go out sometime?". That's just too open-ended. Instead, ask her "Hey would you like to go do XYZ this Saturday?"

 

You want a date, you're going to have to ask for it in no uncertain terms. She either will say yes, or she will say no. Either way, you will be better off than you are now wondering what's on her mind.

 

-A

[meeji]

You must not watch anime! lol think of how the girls act in animes. To me, that's what she is doing.

 

Get a clue. Shes interested in you and probably thinking the same thing you are. It is hard breaking the ice when you are a shy person and you like someone.

 

Ask her out and see what she says.

 

I really shy around guys i like also. I have used a game to communicate with guy that I liked but we met in person before I found out he played the same game as me. In game, we would group and do quests and stuff and thats how that got started.

 

She's dropping hints, I think by pinging you on the DS.

You dropped the ball once...so pick it up!

[Kokoro-Fan]

@ I want to clarify I never went on a date with the girl at all. I simply asked her out, she said yes, and nothing happened after. Oh and we're not playing video games in class at all. lol.

 

@ Arabella. Do you think I have a chance with her based on what I wrote? I'm not really playing games with her. I've been trying to talk to her in the past and nothing that's why I wanted closure last year and got it off my chest by asking her out. And of course, my feelings have not changed at all and that's why I approached her again.

 

The only thing I have left to do is ask her out and this time I'll follow your suggestion. I won't come off as creepy if I ask her out randomly despite only speaking to her once since the semester started will I?

 

*sigh* I feel like I'm going to get rejected to be honest. I still wonder if the yes she gave me when I asked her out last year was her being honest or her just not trying to make me feel bad. She's very shy. Wish me luck I suppose.

[Kokoro-Fan]

You must not watch anime! lol think of how the girls act in animes. To me, that's what she is doing.

 

Get a clue. Shes interested in you and probably thinking the same thing you are. It is hard breaking the ice when you are a shy person and you like someone.

 

Ask her out and see what she says.

 

I really shy around guys i like also. I have used a game to communicate with guy that I liked but we met in person before I found out he played the same game as me. In game, we would group and do quests and stuff and thats how that got started.

 

She's dropping hints, I think by pinging you on the DS.

You dropped the ball once...so pick it up!

 

Hmm... can you give me examples of how shes dropping hints she's possibly interested in me? I really can't see them and to be honest, I've always been terrible at reading girls' body language. And I do watch anime but not a lot (don't have enough time unfortunately).

 

I did find it random she rated my character in the game because we had not spoken in over a year and I was being all awkward by avoiding her at all times (I would avoid looking at her direction, eye contact, etc.) Then she rated my character and the following week I decided to briefly talk to her after class and add each other (and of course I wrote & drew her a message and she responded). But after that, nothing. lol. I guess its because I'm very shy around her. I think I'm going to send her a message soon to show that I do care and think about her and that I'm not trying to avoid her.

 

I can't see her being interested in me at the moment or ever simply because she never went out of her way to initiate conversation with me or anything and our conversations were short. But I was the first to break the ice last year (I had developed the courage to walk up to her and talk; it was akward on my part at first but I ended up doing okay). And I would continue trying to talk to her every other week (we only had class once a week at the time). Then I initially stopped trying because I thought it wasn't going anywhere then I just asked her out.

 

But yeah, any thing would be appreciated. I'm very nervous. Just as nervous as I was last year. I'm just afraid to get heart broken again.

[Arabella]

Kokoro-Fan... you're over-thinking this because you're afraid of rejection. Stop it.

 

We can sit here and discuss this and try to convince you all day long that she likes you -- or you can go ask her out and find out yourself.

 

Which one seems more productive to you?

 

You already asked her out once, and she said yes. She's probably wondering why you never followed through!

 

Just do it.

[meeji]

Hmm... can you give me examples of how shes dropping hints she's possibly interested in me? I really can't see them and to be honest, I've always been terrible at reading girls' body language. And I do watch anime but not a lot (don't have enough time unfortunately).

 

I did find it random she rated my character in the game because we had not spoken in over a year and I was being all awkward by avoiding her at all times (I would avoid looking at her direction, eye contact, etc.) Then she rated my character and the following week I decided to briefly talk to her after class and add each other (and of course I wrote & drew her a message and she responded). But after that, nothing. lol. I guess its because I'm very shy around her. I think I'm going to send her a message soon to show that I do care and think about her and that I'm not trying to avoid her.

 

I can't see her being interested in me at the moment or ever simply because she never went out of her way to initiate conversation with me or anything and our conversations were short. But I was the first to break the ice last year (I had developed the courage to walk up to her and talk; it was akward on my part at first but I ended up doing okay). And I would continue trying to talk to her every other week (we only had class once a week at the time). Then I initially stopped trying because I thought it wasn't going anywhere then I just asked her out.

 

But yeah, any thing would be appreciated. I'm very nervous. Just as nervous as I was last year. I'm just afraid to get heart broken again.

 

If a girl knows a guy is interested in being more than friend and she's not, we are typically the ones that do the ignoring and avoiding that guy. She is being social with you at least. If you put 2 shy people next to each other what's gonna happen? Probably nothing until one of them does something. Do it. If she rejects you then you will have your closure.

[Tiera D]

Just ask her out!

 

Td

[Kokoro-Fan]

I don't know. I really hope she's simply not just being friendly. An introvert girl should know when a guy is interested in them especially when he has asked her out before correct?

 

Anyways, we messaged each other again and it was cute. I'm going to make a move soon.

[Arabella]

@Kokoro-Fan:

 

You posted this thread over ten days ago. While we sit here discussing it you could just go and get your answer. She probably does know you like her... but as you said, she's shy. Do something yourself!

 

After all, you are the one who asked her out. She said yes. The ball is on YOUR court now to bring up more specific plans.

 

Good luck!

 

-A

[CC12]

An introvert girl should know when a guy is interested in them especially when he has asked her out before correct?

 

Incorrect.

 

How would she know that? She's not a mind reader. You asked her out last year she said yes, and then something minor happened that killed your confidence and...you gave up.

 

And even if she did know or suspect it, what exactly do you expect the shy, awkward, anime-loving girl to do about it?

 

Stop telling yourself (and us) that you're going to make a move "soon." This is why smokers continue to smoke. Because they say, "I'm going to quit smoking 'soon.' Today isn't good." Screw that. Do it, already. At least start trying to have normal, consistent conversations with her.

[Kokoro-Fan]

I'm back guys. I haven't had internet access for a couple of weeks which is why I didn't post here again.

 

I asked her out a few weeks ago. I waited for her outside of class and asked if she wanted to go see a movie with me that saturday. I hadn't asked her out sooner because I was waiting for that movie to come out and when it did, it was time for me to ask her out.

 

So what happened? She said she was sorry and began explaining something. I did not understand what she was saying in the first couple of seconds because she was speaking somewhat softly but after that I understood just fine. She basically said her brother wanted to go see it and for some odd reason she had to mention she doesn't go out much. I have no idea why she said that because it wasnt relevant at all. Infact, if she doesn't go out much it would have been a good idea for her to actually go see the movie with me or something.

 

But I told her it was okay and as she was bout to leave I told her I hope to play video games with her again sometime. I think this showed her that I'm okay with her decision and I have nothing against her for rejecting me.

 

Thanks for all the advice guys. I don't feel bad at all. It's been a few weeks since this happened anyways. I'm just happy I finally got closure. It doesn't make sense that last year she said yes to me and this year she said no. Oh well, not that I care. I actually moved on this time. I used to think about her from time to time wishing to see her again. That was until I got closure.

 

Now it's time for me to meet other girls but where? This time I'm going to go for someone who is social. I think that's the type of girl I need.