sendme Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 This is overflow from another thread... Or rather I thought I'd start the conversation... So I never get hit on in bars... Ever... I've never even had a guy offer to buy me a drink... So I'm curious... What's the vibe that tells you you should hit on someone in a bar...?
nessaaa Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 Make eye contact with whoever catches your eye, if they keep eye contact with you give em a lil smile.and that should give them a sign. If no one looks at u.. Well then you must be ugly in person. And why do u want a guy at the bar to buy u a drink? U wanna get raped or something at the end of the night???? Buy your own drink.loser. Sry that's mean but u come off as a desperate loser. And in your other thread u stated that you just came out of a relationship and that it's too soon for you to have sex.... What do u think guys at the bars are looking for?- yes.. A **** n chuck. Get your **** straight.
JSJS Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 This is overflow from another thread... Or rather I thought I'd start the conversation... So I never get hit on in bars... Ever... I've never even had a guy offer to buy me a drink... So I'm curious... What's the vibe that tells you you should hit on someone in a bar...? Sendme, most men are happy to buy someone a drink to get conversation started. If I make eye contact wih someone and smile and they return the smile I'd know it was probably safe to go over and say hello or offer her a drink. If she just looked annoyed or looked away I wouldn't! I'm not wildly confident so there is bound to be better advice available but next time you are out scan the room and see what happens. I imagine many of the single guys will have already spotted you :-) Good luck!
Andy_K Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 Make eye contact. Smile. You look pretty hot, so I have a hard time believing you'll have much trouble!
oaks Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 So I never get hit on in bars... Ever... I've never even had a guy offer to buy me a drink... So I'm curious... What's the vibe that tells you you should hit on someone in a bar...? What are you wearing? Who are you with?
ascendotum Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 (edited) I dated a girl who looked a bit like you. She had a bubbly personality and smiled often. She had only paid for a fraction of the drinks she has ever had when out, because guys bought her drinks all the time. Pricks would try hit on her even when we were out at bars together. I find it hard to believe when you say 'ever'. It depends on the vibe I get from talking to the woman as to whether I will buy her a drink quickly. Where I live, in the local bars a girl like you would get a succession of guys come up to you through out the night, guaranteed! Are the bars you go to overflowing with women and few men? Do you go there in a pack with your aloof glamor gfs. Edited October 12, 2012 by ascendotum
phineas Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 This is overflow from another thread... Or rather I thought I'd start the conversation... So I never get hit on in bars... Ever... I've never even had a guy offer to buy me a drink... So I'm curious... What's the vibe that tells you you should hit on someone in a bar...? This isn't the 1800's. women are allowed to say "hi" to men. I can't imagine how the laws of the universe are broken in the places you go but ascendotum pretty much described how it is. Attractive women have a line of men tripping over themselves to buy her drinks. I'm never one of those men. However I do approach attractive women I see on the rare occasion I do get out.
Eternal Sunshine Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 Wear sexy clothing. Go to the bar and pretend that you are waiting to buy a drink. Look around and see who is already checking you out (those guys are your best bet). Then, make eye contact and smile. Rinse, repeat, be quite obvious. In most cases they will come over.
january2011 Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 From memory, I think you just recently got out of a relationship. While you were in a relationship, perhaps you gave off a vibe that you weren't available and thus never got hit on. And since you recently got out of a relationship, perhaps because your emotions are still all over the place, some guys can sense that vibe and don't want to be part of the drama. From personal experience, I think that being generally attractive (not necessarily good-looking) and approachable as well as making good eye contact are the main elements required to get hit on. I think some guys are attracted to the vulnerable vibe given off by women who are just out of a relationship and desperate to fill the void left by their ex. I strongly suggest that you avoid these men and look for a self-esteem boost elsewhere. I've been where you are and it was not pretty.
BS76 Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 (edited) This is overflow from another thread... Or rather I thought I'd start the conversation... So I never get hit on in bars... Ever... I've never even had a guy offer to buy me a drink... So I'm curious... What's the vibe that tells you you should hit on someone in a bar...? Women regularly have no clue how much they give off a bitch vibe. Walking around with bad body language, a scowl on their face, etc. Who wants to approach that? Instead you should smile more, open up your body language, have good posture, and generally look like you're having a good time. Another issue is your friends and the group dynamics when you go out. DO NOT HUDDLE. If you want guys to approach, don't just stand there in a tight circle. If you're out with friends and have guys in the group, break away from them and start showing you're single. I have the hardest time getting students to approach mixed groups of men and women because they always assume the guys in the group are their boyfriends or husbands. Edited October 12, 2012 by BS76
rocketman122 Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 Why do you want to pick up men in bars? sheet, you beat me to it Pierre. It was exactly what I was going to ask. why the hell bars? go to library or book store, or cafe, or gym..10x better than a bar if you want someone for a relationship... unless youre just looking for cokk meat sandwich?
veggirl Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 I don't know, I suppose what everyone else is saying (minus the dress more sexy and whatnot, never found that to be necessary as long as you look cute/stylish), just look approachable. If you are swarmed together with your girlfriends like a football huddle then no guys aren't gonna likely penetrate. I guess you need to separate yourself from the group a bit. I don't frequent bars anymore but when I did it was usually me and 2 friends. I got loads of drinks. We would sit at the bar and guys would approach or we would stand around (instead of sitting at a table or booth) and guys would just come up. It wasn't on purpose to get drinks from guys, it was just cause we wanted to socialize in general and didn't want to look closed off to that. If you are with your friends, go to the bar ALONE to buy your next drink. Many times guys will chat with you then. eta: a lot of times when I used to go out I did notice that girls looked MEAN. Couldn't blame dudes for not approaching those ones lol.
PJKino Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 sheet, you beat me to it Pierre. It was exactly what I was going to ask. why the hell bars? go to library or book store, or cafe, or gym..10x better than a bar if you want someone for a relationship... unless youre just looking for cokk meat sandwich? I never understood this logic as if men hanging out in bars are all scumbags..Those of us in our 20's and 30's like to hang out in bars/lounges at times to unwind after a long work week where not old enough yet to just play bingo on weekends.. Besides those same people you meet in the gym cafe or book store might actually GASP go to bars at times as well:eek: 1
Mycteria Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 Why do you want to pick up men in bars? Plenty of normal, cool people go to bars. My group of friends and I go to bars all the time because we are young and that's where people our age hang out. And my group of friends includes some really awesome guys that would make any woman a great boyfriend. And I've met some really awesome people at bars, too. Just sayin'. 1
CptObvious Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 I don't have an explanation.. maybe you smell bad? Maybe you sit at a table full of jacked up skinheads? That's all I got :/
GravityMan Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 Sendme, based on your photos and avatar, it's hard to believe that you're not getting approached at bars (or elsewhere, I'm presuming). It's gotta be the vibe you're giving off or something. Maybe smile more, make eye contact...heck even go up to a guy and say hello (in a casual way) just to get a conversation started...the guy could possibly take it from there. 1
Recommended Posts