Tree_Salmon Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 So after months of weird NC with my ex and having her send me recent cryptic messages I decided to lay it out and asked if she loved me and was trying to get back with me or if i need to move on. I later received a response from her new man threatening me and telling me she is no longer into me and I should move on. This made my decision to go back to NC for good, very simple. The moral here is people are crazy and you have to let them go. I could have told this guy all the insults she spewed out about him for hours and hours and confiding in me that she doesnt love him. Or the fact that she begged me to have sex with her while I refused (doing him a favor out of respect) but why bother? I left it alone. I wish this guy the best of luck because he sure as hell is going to need it. I need to go back to NC and continue to move forward. I also need to consider why i would allow such a person back into my life. Clearly there was some internal issue on my part to take this girl back so many times and still love her. Do NOT break NC in cases like mine. When girls don't know what they want after 5 years of a relationship or they have serious issues with family, you need to let them go before they consume all of your time. In this particular case you have to let these people go. It is POISON. 3
21flames Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 What where the cryptic messages? I presume it was her new man if he replied to your messages.
Author Tree_Salmon Posted October 12, 2012 Author Posted October 12, 2012 What where the cryptic messages? I presume it was her new man if he replied to your messages. It was mostly small "hi" and stuff like that in the beginning and then it became flirting but eventually we both went NC. After more than two months of silence I got a full sentence but it wasn't anything real. I guess it was him feeling me out. And I took the bait. But it was my fault for not deleting or ignoring the messages. The only positive is now I've explored every possible scenario and have no more "what if" questions. It's done. There is no what if. She's not a good person and I don't need it. 1
NavyAirTraffic Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 When girls don't know what they want after 5 years of a relationship or they have serious issues with family, you need to let them go before they consume all of your time. In this particular case you have to let these people go. It is POISON. I agree with your advice. Most of us on LS are already heart broken, so for next time take this advice. Hopefully all of us will take a step back in our next relationship to see our partners true problems, and make a level headed decision from there, instead of covering up their problems with our love for them. Example- 1.) Everyone that says "I got dumped out of the blue" later discovers warning signs that they decided to look over. As the pain goes away the puzzle becomes to be a little more clear. 2.) Everyone on here can pinpoint a time where they "should" have broken up with their ex, but instead ignored the signs, pressed forward, and heartbroken today. Everyone says "oh I know I should have broken up with them when (insert occasion)". Next time lets try to use our heads, instead of being blinded by love. Great advice TS!! 2
Author Tree_Salmon Posted October 12, 2012 Author Posted October 12, 2012 I agree with your advice. Most of us on LS are already heart broken, so for next time take this advice. Hopefully all of us will take a step back in our next relationship to see our partners true problems, and make a level headed decision from there, instead of covering up their problems with our love for them. Example- 1.) Everyone that says "I got dumped out of the blue" later discovers warning signs that they decided to look over. As the pain goes away the puzzle becomes to be a little more clear. 2.) Everyone on here can pinpoint a time where they "should" have broken up with their ex, but instead ignored the signs, pressed forward, and heartbroken today. Everyone says "oh I know I should have broken up with them when (insert occasion)". Next time lets try to use our heads, instead of being blinded by love. Great advice TS!! I was there many times with my ex. But I deeply cared for her. I was the one who finally ended the relationship but my love for her never went away. She, clearly, moved on and loves sicking her dog on me. But I'm fairly confident that this wont last forever. That is no longer my issue though. I can think of 5 times where i should have dumped her. Thank god i took the last one seriously. 1
Author Tree_Salmon Posted October 12, 2012 Author Posted October 12, 2012 Never think that situations can't get worse than they already are. They will
TopCat22 Posted October 12, 2012 Posted October 12, 2012 Yep, I broke NC and got nothing in return. She can't even bring herself to talk to me and given that we broke in a friendly manner it's a little surprising. In a strange way though it has helped as it's killed the last little bit of hope I had, so maybe that is a good thing. NC is tough to do, but it's seems to be the smart thing. Don't worry I think a relapse is a perfectly normal thing.
Author Tree_Salmon Posted October 12, 2012 Author Posted October 12, 2012 Yep, I broke NC and got nothing in return. She can't even bring herself to talk to me and given that we broke in a friendly manner it's a little surprising. In a strange way though it has helped as it's killed the last little bit of hope I had, so maybe that is a good thing. NC is tough to do, but it's seems to be the smart thing. Don't worry I think a relapse is a perfectly normal thing. This is the first girl that I didn't disappear on immediately so I had to give it a few relapses to make sure I was doing the right thing. I guess things change the older you get, you want connections to last longer. It doesnt change the fact that some people don't deserve your time though.
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