ShellyGrahams Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 There's this guy that I see everyday on my way to work. We always seem to pass eachother on opposite sides of the sidewalk and lately I've been wanting to say something to him like a quick "Hey"or "Hi". Afterall, We do see eachother every single day, but the thing is, he doesn't give off the friendly vibe. And I'm afraid that if I actually do say something to break the ice, he'll just completely ignore me and continue walking.
TaraMaiden Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 What.....? You want to rip his clothes off and take him right there in the corridor? You want to fall at his feet, clutching his ankles, and scream "I want to have your babies!!" at the top of your voice? You want to wear a la-la-Lolita sexy red dress, drape yourself over his desk, clutch a rose between your teeth and whisper huskily, "Take me, I'm yours, big Boy...." Or: You suspect he's gay? You suspect he's married? You suspect he's just not into you, and doesn't want to date you, marry you and give you children? What? Just say HI to the guy - how can that possibly hurt - and why are you making this sounds so much more complicated than it actually needs to be? I'm truly flummoxed. Whatever happened to neutral social interaction for the sake of being sociable - ?! 3
truth_seeker Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 It's amazing how fear holds many of us back from going after what we truly want.
Author ShellyGrahams Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 Lol..It's Just the vibe that he gives off..Like the "I dont want to be bothered"type vibe...I also forgot to mention that i actually messaged him on facebook and he never answered back. And before you shout "STALKER ALERT"...He's not a complete stranger,per se..He's actually the bestfriend of this dude I no longer associate with. The thing is, We've never actually met on a personal level as in I only "know"him on a first name basis. What.....? You want to rip his clothes off and take him right there in the corridor? You want to fall at his feet, clutching his ankles, and scream "I want to have your babies!!" at the top of your voice? You want to wear a la-la-Lolita sexy red dress, drape yourself over his desk, clutch a rose between your teeth and whisper huskily, "Take me, I'm yours, big Boy...." Or: You suspect he's gay? You suspect he's married? You suspect he's just not into you, and doesn't want to date you, marry you and give you children? What? Just say HI to the guy - how can that possibly hurt - and why are you making this sounds so much more complicated than it actually needs to be? I'm truly flummoxed. Whatever happened to neutral social interaction for the sake of being sociable - ?!
TaraMaiden Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 Aaaah, there you go. Always 'more info'..... Next time you meet him. just say "Hi, *name!*" If he doesn't reply, just take his arm and say - "you know, there's really nothing wrong in at least being civil or sociable. Is there?" and walk off. Next time, if he blanks you, ignore him. If he says 'hi' (and leave the first move to him,) smile neutrally, and say "Hi. There, that didn't hurt, did it?"
Author ShellyGrahams Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 Hmmm..I will try that but at the same time, i don't think i should say anything to him at all..I mean, he probably thinks i'm some weird nutcase since i messaged him on fb, instead of just talking to him in person. I mean, he never replied back to the message and i'm pretty sure he knew it was me,so maybe that's his way of saying he's not interested in knowing me(being friends)... Aaaah, there you go. Always 'more info'..... Next time you meet him. just say "Hi, *name!*" If he doesn't reply, just take his arm and say - "you know, there's really nothing wrong in at least being civil or sociable. Is there?" and walk off. Next time, if he blanks you, ignore him. If he says 'hi' (and leave the first move to him,) smile neutrally, and say "Hi. There, that didn't hurt, did it?"
TaraMaiden Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 I'm not really sure i understand where the problem is. So what? Big deal....
Author ShellyGrahams Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 Why isn't it a big deal that he possibly thinks I'm a weirdo? I'm not really sure i understand where the problem is. So what? Big deal....
Balzac Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 Likely he AND his buddy think you're a weirdo.
TaraMaiden Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 Why do you even care? What does it matter? YOU know you're not, and you probably have many colleagues you get on with very well - who know full well you're not, so - what's the problem? You're worried about what a virtual stranger thinks of you, simply because he's tacit? Just let him be. Give it time, he may say hi, he might not. Who cares - ? You just pass him on the sidewalk - it's not like you live under the same roof - !! Jeesh, don't waste your time wondering if one single individual thinks you're a weirdo. If I worried about that - I'd have been put in the funny-farm years ago....
Author ShellyGrahams Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 His buddy and I use to "talk"(IN REAL LIFE)and then somehow had a falling out with eachother and now we no longer associate. But I wouldn't put it past his "Buddy"to convince him that I am a "weirdo". Likely he AND his buddy think you're a weirdo.
Author ShellyGrahams Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 Ok...Tomorrow I Would Casually walk up to him and say "Hi,John"...But then again, I don't want to think that i missed all those opportunities to say "hI" to him, just to get a tiny "Hi"back. I want to make my effort worth something as in how do i carry on short conversation. Why do you even care? What does it matter? YOU know you're not, and you probably have many colleagues you get on with very well - who know full well you're not, so - what's the problem? You're worried about what a virtual stranger thinks of you, simply because he's tacit? Just let him be. Give it time, he may say hi, he might not. Who cares - ? You just pass him on the sidewalk - it's not like you live under the same roof - !! Jeesh, don't waste your time wondering if one single individual thinks you're a weirdo. If I worried about that - I'd have been put in the funny-farm years ago....
Balzac Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 Exactly. It's part of the ManCode. The bigger Q is why do you desire any communication with this guy, knowing he is best buddy? Trust me it's fouled soil. Only you know what the "fall out" was about. You haven't truly clarified if this is professional dirt or personal dirt. The professional pecking order. Fortune 500 company or something much smaller.
yongyong Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 To be honest, if you are hot, guys won't care about that kind of creeeeepy approach (message on FB)
Author ShellyGrahams Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 Um...Friendship...And I would think that he would assume that i want something just by saying "Hi" to him anyways. Why? What do you want from him?
TaraMaiden Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 But WHY?? What's so important? Is this a way to get back through to mutual buddy?
Balzac Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 Not sure I agree that "hot" overrides in a professional environment. I'm thinking there's waaaay more to this story.
Author ShellyGrahams Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 Well, Not Like i went out with his "best buddy" or anything. I'm not saying we had "sex"..Although, he did want to and I politely declined. And the reason I want to become "buddy-buddy"with this guy is to see if he's just like the rest of his tribe of friends(fake,bastard-ish) For Some reason, I see him as different." Exactly. It's part of the ManCode. The bigger Q is why do you desire any communication with this guy, knowing he is best buddy? Trust me it's fouled soil. Only you know what the "fall out" was about. You haven't truly clarified if this is professional dirt or personal dirt. The professional pecking order. Fortune 500 company or something much smaller.
Author ShellyGrahams Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 What's wrong with making a new friend? And PLEASEEEE...His friend isn't worth all of this hassle i'm putting myself through. But WHY?? What's so important? Is this a way to get back through to mutual buddy?
Balzac Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 Good luck with that. My prediction is you are dead to "the tribe".
Author ShellyGrahams Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 Well, Two of the guys from his "clan" of friends are the only two i've ever spoken to on a personal level AT DIFFERENT TIMES in my life.And even so, whether i had a fallen out with his friends or not..What does that have to do with him?? If he follows behind his friends and doesn't give me a chance at friendship, does that show he has weak character? Good luck with that. My prediction is you are dead to "the tribe".
TaraMaiden Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 .....the reason I want to become "buddy-buddy"with this guy is to see if he's just like the rest of his tribe of friends(fake,bastard-ish) For Some reason, I see him as different." Really? LIke attracts like. There may well therefore be a reason why he's stand-offish and unapproachable. because that's what he's trying to communicate. is it really worth the effort if chances are he's more like them, than not like them? I am honestly struggling to see your point, but the deeper we get with this (as you began with very scant information!) the more I think you are actually over-thinking this and making it too big a deal.
Author ShellyGrahams Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 Well, I don't want go through life just assuming he is just like them because then I would be judging and i'm not the judgmental type. For Example, If a guy is friends with a bunch of weed heads, I don't want to assume he smokes weed. Granted, There's a chance that he does but at the end of the day, I just wouldn't know unless I asked. Really? LIke attracts like. There may well therefore be a reason why he's stand-offish and unapproachable. because that's what he's trying to communicate. is it really worth the effort if chances are he's more like them, than not like them? I am honestly struggling to see your point, but the deeper we get with this (as you began with very scant information!) the more I think you are actually over-thinking this and making it too big a deal.
Author ShellyGrahams Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 1)Im pretty..not drop dead gorgeous but definitely not ugly 2)Due to my shyness 3)I believe guys and girls can be platonic buddies..and without neither one of them being gay"(no offense to anyone) First thing that jumped out from the Op, is 1) she is not really hot. 2) she is kind of desperate and 3) guys and girls can't be platonic buddy-buddies, unless both are so ugly, nether would even think about it....
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