ReadMyThread Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 I now realize what it is my ex left me for another guy and I'm so f****** mad right now. I was way too nice to her. Put her first before everything and was being a "nice guy". Girls like the "bad guys" and I was not that to her. She left me for one of these "bad guys" and he is going to win in the end. They are going to fall in love and that will be that. He will be better than me in her eyes. I showed way too much weakness when she left me and now she will NEVER be attracted to me again now so I KNOW I have to move on and which I am but I am just very mad right now. Now that I KNOW I could have prevented her from breaking up with me and it's too late, its eating me inside. I'm pissed off. I wasn't confident in our relationship and to be honest, she had the most control in the relationship and I didn't have a back bone. I did everything for her and was always there for her. I told her I loved her everyday. I wasn't dominant. She will see this guy as more of a MAN than I was and she is going to fall for him . I'm so stupid. I should have just stepped up and stopped acting like a f****** wuss in the relationship. When she left me for another guy she said, "Your just too nice, that's your problem. You care about people too much". She is going to fall in love with him because he smokes, he drinks (I do neither), he is way more confident than I was, He is 22 and I am 19, he is more of a man, he is a BAD GUY. She was right. I was way too nice and girls do not like nice guys. I f***** our relationship up and I hate myself now. It's sad I am just now realizing this a month and a half after she broke up with me but at least I did for the future. It was my fault she left me for him. I hate myself. He is going to be SO MUCH better than me. He is. He is going to give her everything she wanted in a guy that I didn't give to her. I'm never going to treat a woman the way I treated her. I'm so heartbroken. I hate her but most of all I hate myself. I wish I could go back and be more of a man and show her. :'(. I really do. I change my ways now and I will never treat a girl that way I treated her and I wish there was a way I could show her that now but now it is too late. She is dating him and I'm all alone and will be for a while because I was a "nice guy". I hate myself.
dreamstate83 Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 How old are you? To be quite honest I wouldn't worry about changing yourself if you treated her well. Some females just want to be punished by being with jerks to be honest - and that makes them a non match for you. Somewhere out there is a girl thinking the same thing "I'm way too nice and it always causes me to be crushed". Just imagine what happens the day you meet this girl and decide to treat her like garbage just to be the alpha male! She will post on loveshack just like you are now and the cycle will continue.
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 How old are you? To be quite honest I wouldn't worry about changing yourself if you treated her well. Some females just want to be punished by being with jerks to be honest - and that makes them a non match for you. Somewhere out there is a girl thinking the same thing "I'm way too nice and it always causes me to be crushed". Just imagine what happens the day you meet this girl and decide to treat her like garbage just to be the alpha male! She will post on loveshack just like you are now and the cycle will continue. I'm 19. She is 16 and left me for a 23 year old or 22 somewhere around there. No man, I honestly, honestly have to change myself. I cared for her WAY TOO MUCH. I would have done ANYTHING for her and she knew that and took advantage of it. I will NEVER treat a girl like garbage, I'm not saying because of this I'm going to turn into someone who treats women bad. I'm just not going to EVER treat a woman the way I treated her. It showed how weak I was and stupid I am.
Calico Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 Not being a doormat starts with appreciating and respecting yourself. You're not doing this right now. Your self-worth is NOT determined by whether a fickle 16 year old girl loves you. She was too young for you anyway. Try someone around your age (19) or even a few years older. You'll get better results. (But befriend yourself first.) Treating a woman well doesn't show that you are weak or stupid. Doing what you do right now, DOES. 3
NateC Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 Not being a doormat starts with appreciating and respecting yourself. You're not doing this right now. Your self-worth is NOT determined by whether a fickle 16 year old girl loves you. She was too young for you anyway. Try someone around your age (19) or even a few years older. You'll get better results. (But befriend yourself first.) Treating a woman well doesn't show that you are weak or stupid. Doing what you do right now, DOES. Absolutely. Toss her aside and let her be with the "bad guy". Once you get over that you can rebuild your self-confidence and realize that you can find someone better!
NoMoreJerks Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 I now realize what it is my ex left me for another guy and I'm so f****** mad right now. I was way too nice to her. Put her first before everything and was being a "nice guy". Girls like the "bad guys" and I was not that to her. She left me for one of these "bad guys" and he is going to win in the end. Just because she was such a bitch to you does not mean that all women go for "bad guys." Actually, I was with a bad guy, and left him (after he threatened to dump me -- gave him a second chance, then dumped him again). It's not about that at all. There's no universal law that states that all or even most women are attracted to "bad guys". Also, a nice guy is not necessarily a guy who does everything that a woman wants/asks for, or a guy who acts like he is the "woman" in the relationship. Far from it. You can be a nice guy and still not do any of that. 1
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 Not being a doormat starts with appreciating and respecting yourself. You're not doing this right now. Your self-worth is NOT determined by whether a fickle 16 year old girl loves you. She was too young for you anyway. Try someone around your age (19) or even a few years older. You'll get better results. (But befriend yourself first.) Treating a woman well doesn't show that you are weak or stupid. Doing what you do right now, DOES. I hate her. I'm not going to be this girl's doormat. To be honest, I was so nice to her that she wouldn't even WANT me to be this her doormat. Days after the break-up she texted me and said, "Bye B**** boy" That is eating me upright now. But she was right. I pratically was her B****. I wasn't man enough for her and I'm finally realizes this. You are right though, she is way too young for me. I should have known I would end-up heartbroken from the start with her being this young regardless on how I treated her.
NateC Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 I hate her. I'm not going to be this girl's doormat. To be honest, I was so nice to her that she wouldn't even WANT me to be this her doormat. Days after the break-up she texted me and said, "Bye B**** boy" That is eating me upright now. But she was right. I pratically was her B****. I wasn't man enough for her and I'm finally realizes this. You are right though, she is way too young for me. I should have known I would end-up heartbroken from the start with her being this young regardless on how I treated her. Girls her age tend to not be mature enough to handle an actual relationship. It's quite common unfortunately.
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 Absolutely. Toss her aside and let her be with the "bad guy". Once you get over that you can rebuild your self-confidence and realize that you can find someone better! I have. I have already accepted that she is with him and that's what she wants so I can't do anything about it. I tell myself, "She wants her bad guy? Then let her have her bad guy." It just sucks knowing I could have prevented it. I know I deserve better. I just don't see better right now. I know I WILL but I've never been in love before until with her so I have never been through this before.
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 Girls her age tend to not be mature enough to handle an actual relationship. It's quite common unfortunately. I know. She is so immature. I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN! lol. That's what gets to me the most. Trying to be with a 16 year old forever? lol. I'm retarded.
dreamstate83 Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 I know. She is so immature. I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN! lol. That's what gets to me the most. Trying to be with a 16 year old forever? lol. I'm retarded. I wouldn't say retarded. Just young and learning! It's an unfortunate but necessary evil! 1
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 Hey, Do you know Jenna Marbles YouTube channel, she does a video response to the that question do nice guys finish last. Her answer is basically no they do not, that catch phrase is a cop out. Here's the link to the video: I'd say she knows what she's talking about, and she's got come valid points which she makes in an entertaining way. Yeah I know her. I actually JUST watched this video BEFORE I posted this thread. This video made me feel better I guess.
Chi townD Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 The dude isn't a better man than you. He's 22, that makes him a pedophile. And you shouldn't be messing with a 16 year old girl either. But I'm not gonna ride on you too hard because at least you're still a teenager. Trust me, their relationship isn't gonna last. He can get into bars, she can't. He can get into Clubs, she can't. Hell, technically, he can get into R rated movies, she can't (technically). He's going to get bored with her and kick her to the curb. Hit it and quit it. That's his game plan. The Karma Bus is coming.
LostOne1 Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 this is a phase for her... 5-10 years down the road... she will regret this and know she was immature. But 16 yr olds have a phase to want to date lots of people and just try different stuff....
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 The dude isn't a better man than you. He's 22, that makes him a pedophile. And you shouldn't be messing with a 16 year old girl either. But I'm not gonna ride on you too hard because at least you're still a teenager. Trust me, their relationship isn't gonna last. He can get into bars, she can't. He can get into Clubs, she can't. Hell, technically, he can get into R rated movies, she can't (technically). He's going to get bored with her and kick her to the curb. Hit it and quit it. That's his game plan. The Karma Bus is coming. I know they won't last. With him being that old and her that young I know it wont. I should have know me and her wouldn't of lol. You want to know something funny though? HE KNOWS SHE LEFT ME FOR HIM. HE KNOWS! lol. Is she really that stupid enough to think he is going to want to be serious with someone who left someone for him? She'll do the same to him or close to like you said, he just wants a piece and then will get bored. I hope he does her bogus. Maybe then she can actually learn her damn lesson.
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 The Karma Bus is coming. lol. I really like that. Makes me smile . Thanks
Author ReadMyThread Posted October 11, 2012 Author Posted October 11, 2012 this is a phase for her... 5-10 years down the road... she will regret this and know she was immature. But 16 yr olds have a phase to want to date lots of people and just try different stuff.... I highly doubt she will regret this. Only way she will regret this is if this guy cheats on her or breaks her heart. That is the ONLY way she will regret it. If he doesn't break her heart in-time, she will just be with him until she finds another guy and dump him for the next like she did me and she will continue breaking hearts. I understand this phase she is going through now. I shouldn't have got so attached to someone so young.
LostOne1 Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 I highly doubt she will regret this. Only way she will regret this is if this guy cheats on her or breaks her heart. That is the ONLY way she will regret it. If he doesn't break her heart in-time, she will just be with him until she finds another guy and dump him for the next like she did me and she will continue breaking hearts. I understand this phase she is going through now. I shouldn't have got so attached to someone so young. nawww when people get into their mid and late 20's they DO look back. She WILL look back at you and realize what she did was wrong. By then you guys will have LONG moved on in life. Trust me.. she will and I know MANY girls that have regretted doing something exactly like your ex did... it's a phase man and honestly most relationships around the teens years do not last long term. I haven't seen too many that have lasted. I been where you are though dating in my teen times or right after highschool and it was tough time to date because everything seems short term.
Calico Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 I'll say something unpopular here. I think there is little terribly wrong with what that girl did and does. She is sixteen. 16. It is perfectly normal for her to date different guys and explore her sexuality and her relationship needs. Of course she's not mature. How could she be? She's sixteen. She was 9 months with RMT, and that is an amazingly long time for her age group -- and that means that you, RMT, can't possibly be as bad as you think you are or were. She would never have stayed this long otherwise. Cut her some slack, and cut yourself some slack too. Yes, the situation sucks for you and this hurts like hell. But let her be and let her live her life, and don't question her character or moral values. She's only sixteen once, and she's only sixteen! The 22 year old is a little irresponsible, but legal stuff aside, most guys aren't much more mature at 22 than a young woman at 16. He's very unlikely to be a "pedo". He's just a 22 year old male with too much testosterone and too little sense of responsibility. Let's judge less and accept more. 3
NoMoreJerks Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 OK, I didn't realize that she is 16..... I mean, what the hell were you thinking? That she would just want to settle down with you and marry you? Seriously? What were you thinking when dating a 16 year old (aside from the fact that you completely IGNORED the fact that you were dating a minor -- which is itself disgusting)? I always thought that dating that young is more about experimenting or kids thinking they had found "the one" when they only had a crush on the guy/girl.. that sort of thing... the fact that you were dating a 16-year-old and expecting something more to come out of this demonstrates that something is wrong on your end, in terms of your expectations... they were terribly misplaced.
TopCat22 Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 Look, you really need to stop focusing on this "nice guy" rubbish. Whilst it is true that you don't want to be a doormat and a woman will expect a man to be the more dominant partner in a relationship, this idea that she doesn't want to be with you because you are not manly enough is plain wrong. She is 16. She will dump this new guy at some point, as he won't be what she is looking for either. She hasn't been with enough guys yet to filter through the qualities she is looking for and the only way she will discover these is by dating guys and learning to recognise these qualities. Please don't think you could have done anything about this. If you'd acted more dominant and put on this alpha male bravado she would still have left you. By all means work on yourself and make sure you stand up for yourself and aren't a doormat to people, but please don't think you need to be a d*ck for girls to like you. You can be a nice guy and still attract women.
a.b Posted October 11, 2012 Posted October 11, 2012 In England where I live it's perfectly acceptable for a 19 year old to date a 16 year old. It's strange to see, but I am aware America have some very different laws.
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