AD1980 Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 Yeah. I don't think it has to be massive success, like a hot girl walking up to you on the street and propositioning you for sex; but little things that serve as building blocks. Maybe a girl gives you a number here, a girl smiles at you in the mall there, a girl responds to your texts/phone calls in a way that makes it seem like she's genuinely into you and not just texting to be nice. Things like that, little by little build confidence and push people in the right direction. They need something to get them started, in my opinion. Yep exactly i need that one girl to show some interest and attraction to at least know im not a total troll and there are women out there into me.. I just dont get how only in the dating and attracting a mate world people expect somrbody to be blindly confident and positive when theyve had no sucess..its just not realistic or logic at all..
suladas Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 A women could hide it much better then men, just because women are so much better at picking up on stuff. I think I hid how bitter I was when I was on a date a few weeks ago pretty well, but that's only for a few hours. It wouldn't take much more time for it to shine through i'm sure. Don't get me wrong i'm not bitter in general about dating, I was just still bitter over my BU and a bit towards women but it's gone now it was just too early to be going on a date. But as far as hiding emotions, women pick up on it so easy. I couldn't believe how well my ex picked up on things about me in a relatively short time. She was wrong about a few things, but for the most part it was spot on. I couldn't even come close to reading her like that, no matter how hard I tried.
ettaj Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 Stop being bitter. She said absolutely nothing bitter in here. She said that a lot of guys here are bitter and some are even mentally unstable, which is true and makes sense. That is not bitter of her, but her just mking observations based on what these guys in here show her. You and utterer of lies need to stop trying to pick a fight with the girl.
Necris Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 I cover up my loneliness and other feelings by either showing lots of confidence and trying to seem happy and comedic at the same time and make it all a joke. Besides I just don't discuss my dating life at all that would be retarded to go up to a girl that I'm trying to impress and tell her how no girl wants me. On the day to day I normally don't show much emotion at all so I doubt people will look at me and say "man that guy is just so bitter". I'm not feeling any bitterness but I do feel based on evidence and life experience that the possibility of companionship is very very low. 1
Author ThaWholigan Posted October 10, 2012 Author Posted October 10, 2012 I cover up my loneliness and other feelings by either showing lots of confidence and trying to seem happy and comedic at the same time and make it all a joke. Besides I just don't discuss my dating life at all that would be retarded to go up to a girl that I'm trying to impress and tell her how no girl wants me. On the day to day I normally don't show much emotion at all so I doubt people will look at me and say "man that guy is just so bitter". I'm not feeling any bitterness but I do feel based on evidence and life experience that the possibility of companionship is very very low. You don't have to say anything bitter to emit that energy somehow. This is what I'm getting at. That lack of comfort in one's own energy. Sh*t, I got a 180 here, let's flip this: If you are bitter, own it, wear it on your sleeve every day. Don't try to hide it . 1
utterer of lies Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 (edited) You and utterer of lies need to stop trying to pick a fight with the girl. It's a reference to another thread, a post she made. You don't get the reference. That's ok. She didn't either, unfortunately, which was unexpected. Hawaii's joke was still funny. What are you, some kind of internet white knight? Edited October 10, 2012 by utterer of lies
xdahliax Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 It's a reference to another thread, a post she made. You don't get the reference. That's ok. She didn't either, unfortunately, which was unexpected. Hawaii's joke was still funny. I sort of got it, except I'm not bitter. I'm just unfazed. 1
ettaj Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 It's a reference to another thread, a post she made. You don't get the reference. That's ok. She didn't either, unfortunately, which was unexpected. Hawaii's joke was still funny. What are you, some kind of internet white knight? Translation: "Oh, my comment didn't have any condescending, bull**** crap-starting insults. And she didn't come back and get angry at anything I said. QUICKLY! I must edit my comment to get a rise out of her THIS TIME - I must start some more ****!! My LS rep DEPENDS on it!" Lol, shut the eff up.
utterer of lies Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 Translation: "Oh, my comment didn't have any condescending, bull**** crap-starting insults. And she didn't come back and get angry at anything I said. QUICKLY! I must edit my comment to get a rise out of her THIS TIME - I must start some more ****!! My LS rep DEPENDS on it!" Lol, shut the eff up. Why all the cursing? Don't get all riled up.
ImperfectionisBeauty Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 I try to, when I go out on a date I try to look at it as a new opportunity so I have to forget all the other BS
William Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 Let's just get back on topic... Moderation agrees. Stage Two.
xdahliax Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 I try to, when I go out on a date I try to look at it as a new opportunity so I have to forget all the other BS That's right. It's actually easier to be less bitter when you're sweet on someone, because you tend to see everything that's great about them, regardless of what other people have done to you. It's harder to generalize.
espec10001 Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 This is how I look at it: Take a cup of sweet juice and cup of salt water. Ask either sex which one they are more likely to drink, and most of the time they'll pick the sweet juice. Salt is bitter and makes you go "Yuck!" Sweet makes you go MMMM and want more! Not too sweet though, there's a fine line. After a series of rejections, salt starts to build up in the drink and people are less likely to choose it. Also, since this is an anonymous forum, we're more likely to expose our every thought in detail that we wouldn't otherwise do in real life. If a guy is constantly getting rejected, the problem is you're focusing too much on women's approval. There's so many women out there, all with different personalities and looks, that all you really need is one to appreciate who you are. I think there is more magic to it than many realize. In other words, it isn't a one sided phenomena. Men think they have to do all the work, and while a man has to play his role in courting and dating, it takes two to tango, and if the chemistry or spark or click isn't there, that third mysterious principle beyond the man and the woman which is imperceptible, nothing will come about and the man usually blames himself for the failure. Don't do this! Your time will come, don't worry.
somedude81 Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 Now what poster 3 is saying here is quite a common line of thought - "I'm not bitter around people, only online or by myself". This is not true in my opinion. I believe your attitude will manifest somehow in your demeanor and the way you are around people - which would put off even someone like poster 1 who doesn't mind inexperience in a man. Hello, I'm poster 3. Or as I preferred to be called Pousta Nanban San-san None of the girls that I have ever hung out with had any clue that I was bitter. None. The key is though that when I'm out with a girl, I'm not hiding my bitterness, not at all. It's just that I'm super happy to actually be out with a girl. I'm having fun enjoying the moment, bitterness and my troubles are the last thing on my mind. I love taking salsa classes at my school because it's so fun to dance with girls and be around them. I'm always laughing and smiling because I'm just having a good time. When the class is over and I come home, it's like I do a complete 180 and realize how alone I am. The sadness, depression and frustration just washes over me. I feel like I get to be who I really am when I'm around women. That's when my personality shines through. When I'm alone, the angry bitter side comes out because I'm simply not happy being alone. If I were bitter, I would never have gotten the opportunities I have gotten this year and would probably still be a virgin now, just pissed off on the internet. IMO, you weren't alone long enough to actually become bitter. You were lucky to have several opportunities given to you. You just finally started to capitalize on them. Some guys are just not given any opportunities. Unless I've missed some, I've tried to move on every opportunity in front of me, and they all turned out to be red herrings.
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