conzboneeus Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 I'm a single legit guy using a few online dating sites. I have been getting a lot of mail from women on these sites. I don't write women anymore figured if they are interested they'll write me. I am guessing really hot women get 100 or more and I don't get even close to that many, but enough to the point where I cannot keep up and am forgetting names, etc. And these are what I consider attractive, smart women I'd like to date. If I take my profile down they seem to think I am married or left the site or something. But I don't like to keep my profile up if I am interested in a few women because then I feel like I am falsely advertising myself when not available. I've thought about writing the women I am interested in and saying I still want to date you I am just taking down my profile because I am getting too many mails. But I mean how tacky and pompous does that sound plus they probably think yeah right, he's married. I'm a nice guy and I do work out very hard everyday. Not Brad Pitt by any means but women are always open to second dates. No, not eactly a terrible problem but still looking for advice. And also how does a guy choose between multiple good looking, smart, fun ladies? Man I never thought this would ever happen to me but sometimes I feel like a phoney baloney and I am not. Do I have to pick just one.......
curlygirl40 Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 Are you at the point where you're texting or talking on the phone to the women you're interested in? If so, instead of hiding your profiles can't you just not login and then others will see that you haven't been on the site for a while? Then you can continue with the ones you are talking to but the others who contact you will just see that you haven't checked messages and instead of feeling ignored they will assume your personal life is busy. It's a thought. And it's a good problem to have. I see your dilemma. When I get in this position usually what I do is hide my profile and tell the people that I'm talking to that I'm taking a break from the site but would like to continue our conversation. But yet I would do that and not worry people are going to think I'm married. 1
oaks Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 And also how does a guy choose between multiple good looking, smart, fun ladies? Man I never thought this would ever happen to me but sometimes I feel like a phoney baloney and I am not. Do I have to pick just one....... Get their phone numbers, then you don't need to log in to the site so you won't be worrying about all those emails (which will dry up anyway since you won't be active on the site). You can swap email addresses, too, if you want to write stuff. Consider getting a throwaway email account if you're not sure if you trust giving these strangers your 'real' email address. Eventually it's traditional to pick just one, but you may be able to date several of them to decide which one you prefer.
Author conzboneeus Posted October 10, 2012 Author Posted October 10, 2012 I think the not logging idea is a good one you both came up with that and I didn't think of that! That covers it just haven't logged on in a while. If things don't work out I can always log back on ans say hello, that I took a break. Very good! Yes I am talking to several on the phone and have met several for dates. I guess what it comes down to, like anything else is life, is you cannot have your cake and eat it too. Or as the Lovin Spoonfull song goes "Did You Ever Have to Make Up Your Mind". I'm showing my age. I guess dating several is not bad. But....what about sleeping with more than one? Not talking about the usual precautions one takes that goes without saying. But women take that much more serious than men and I was raised Catholic by my mom and I really hate to mislead or hurt people. But I really like sleeping with women too! Anyway you answered my original question thank you. I am going off topic now so will cease and desist.
oaks Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 I guess dating several is not bad. But....what about sleeping with more than one? If you tell them all that this what you're doing, and they still let you, then I see no problem with it. Or, if they all understand that you're just 'casually' dating (whatever that means...) then you might get away with your balls still attached. Beyond that, sure, it happens a lot, but people get upset about it. I doubt you need to sleep with them all to figure out which one you want to date... so sleep with her, and if you like it ditch the others, and if you don't like it ditch her. Repeat until only 1 left. (and I'm sure I'll get flak for saying that)
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