Thinking about making another move...What do you all think? Suggestions appreciated!

[MashedPotatoes]

A little rundown of my current situation. Met girl at a coffee shop. Established rapport and asked her out a few weeks later in person after she showed several indicators of interest. She responded by saying "I'm not seeing anyone now, but there's a reason why I'm not dating. But let's hang out, no pressure..." This vague response kind of threw me off, but I figured why not and give it a chance. First couple of "hang outs" were at my place. Because of the whole "hang out, no pressure" I didn't really make any sort of move, although in hindsight, I really should have. After our first few "pseudo dates" she told me "I really enjoy your company, but I don't see this going anywhere. I'd still love to hang out as friends though..." I thought this was an awkward thing to say, since I thought we were just "hanging out" to begin with. Now, I have my theory of why she said that. Basically, I misinterpreted what she meant when she said "hang out, no pressure" which led me to somewhat restrict myself around her by not making any sort of move which in turn led her to believe that I was ok just being friends with her which in turn made her say "I don't see this going anywhere."

 

Anyways, I do genuinely enjoy her company and figured there's no harm in having an attractive female friend...just improves my social status right? haha. So, it's been a year since I initially asked her out and we typically hang out about 3-4 times a month, always one to one and usually at my place. Now, up until recently, I've been the one to suggest meeting up. We exchange texts frequently (about every other day on average) which she initiates about 50% of the time. During the past couple weeks, I've noticed that she's been initiating a whole lot more. I've also noticed that she's been sending me texts asking questions that she could easily find the answers to. She sent me a text LATE Saturday night asking how the wedding I went to was. Typically, when texting, we simply exchange witty/flirty banter back and forth, but recently she's been asking how I'm doing, what I'm currently doing...etc. Just this past week, she's wanted to hang out 4 times (we hung out twice).

 

My question to all you loveshack nerds is...what's with her sudden change in behavior? I our relationship dynamic is completely different compared to what it was a year ago. Is this her way of showing renewed interest? What should I do? I still talk to other girls (I unintentionally hit on 2 married women at the wedding!), but I definitely would like to take another chance with this girl.

 

Any help/advice is greatly appreciated.

 

We're both 30 btw.

[NateC]

Sounds to me like you're getting a second chance. Don't make it awkward, but making a move during one of your "hang outs" like you wanted to before is probably your best bet now.

 

Good luck!

[HeldbyGravity]

I interpreted that as, "Oh, now it's safe to flirt with him without him thinking I'm interested!". I think flirting is just a way girls and guys interact nowadays; unless stated directly, it isn't always serious.

 

I also think that her "reason" for not dating anyone could easily be any of the following: already interested in someone or Just Not Into You. If I had a serious reason for not dating someone, I would Tell them what that reason was, but a lot of girls (I have been friends with some of them....) would disguise their intentions there to spare your feelings.