GG3 Posted October 9, 2012 Posted October 9, 2012 I started dating a guy I met at work back in February. He is 42, never married and appears to have been the one to end things or back off in EVERY relationship he's had. As we were dating I started realizing this red flag and became suspicious. He told me during this that almost ALL of his relationships have been long distance which to me was another signal...commitmentphobe issues! Sure enough after about 3 blissful months where he talked about how happy he was and even asked me questions about marriage...he started to retreat. Refused to talk about it and all he would say was he "didn't know why." I was extremely hurt. I was the only woman he let his friends meet in 7 years because he won't let his girlfriends meet his friends and likes to "compartamentalize" things as he says. He told me every girlfriend he had told him he is "hard to get close to." He became very critical during this time and I didn't leave as soon as I should have. I gave it two months after he started backing off but couldn't stand how I was being treated anymore and ended it. He asked about being friends and I told him I wasn't interested. However, he emailed me occasionally anyway or sent IM's at work. I was friendly back...was just glad I wasn't being treated like a lepper anymore as when he started to back off...he had barely talked to me like I did something wrong. So a week ago a group photo was posted of him with his friends on a social networking site. There was a girl in the photo and they had their arms around each other but could be in a friend way. He is very weird about posting anything about anyone he dates so chances are she is just a friend but it still really upset me and decided it was time to delete him. I felt that it was insensitive. He knew i had feelings for him and that I wanted to work things out. So here it is a week later and I get a request from him to play words with friends on a saturday night at 9PM and then when I didn't answer it, I get an email tonight asking "you decided not to be friends?" Why doesn't this guy just move on? He came on so strong and with all his talk made it like I was "the one" and then to try to demote me to "friends." I didn't do anything wrong to this guy...he just started criticizing things like that I don't cook, or "don't like milk" (isn't that stupid), that I don't read the news (isn't true at all)...the nitpicky list goes on and on. He criticized me so much that I spent a month depressed feeling worthless. He doesn't even seem to look at his own issues and realize he's far from perfect. If there are so many things he didn't like about me then move on!! Is he just trying to feel less guilty?
truth_seeker Posted October 9, 2012 Posted October 9, 2012 I would send him a reply expressing your feelings. Make him feel worthless.
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