lostinto Posted July 28, 2004 Posted July 28, 2004 I've been involved in a 4 year long distance relationship and we've never had a problem except when I get depressed because I miss him so much. He is currently living in the states but is a resident of Canada. I've been down to see him more times than I can count and he usually pays for my airfare. He is wonderful and I know he loves me but hates it when I get emotional about missing him and wanting him to come home. He loves it where he is and he will obviously have to come at some point. When I met him he knew he was going to be leaving to go somewhere as he and his wife of 16 years finally had no further ties and he wanted to get out of dodge and comtemplate retirement or simply take a break and hang out, he can afford to. I must mention his ex is one of his best friends and I've never had a problem with this. You see they haven't totally figured out their financial seperation so he continues to draw a salary from her company of which he owns shares and he takes care of all the graphic work and web sites as his employment and he really does work for it as I've witnessed it. She has never known about me and he does not know if there is anyone in her life and doesn't care to. My problem...he recently said he needed a break from me but insists he stills love me and that I will always be his babe. What should I do? We have been emailing each other up until last Saturday as I figured I should be abiding by his wishes and let him have his break and leave contact up to him. What do you think? What can I do to make him miss me and give me hope it's not over. I'm very much in love with him and I know he likes and loves me. We've had a wonderful stress free relationship (little bickering a few times) and people always comment what a wonderful couple we are. I miss the thought of not going to see him and we haven't talked on the phone for 1 month. Any advice or wisdom that is out there or a similar experience I woud be so appreciative of hearing about. Thank you for your attention.[font=courier new][/font]
uriel Posted July 28, 2004 Posted July 28, 2004 Sounds like this isn't about your chemistry necessarily, but the LDR thing. He probably wants to see women who are available and test what it's like not to have the LD stress. Plus, as you say, he's recently ended a marriage. That usually leaves men, especially, wanting to test new waters rather than being tied down to someone new. Not only are you at a distance, but it sounds like he's getting the sense you want exclusivity and more emotional connection. I think his asking for space is a sign he's not ready for that. What to do? Sorry -- but I think you need to give this guy time and space. Let him contact you. Meanwhile, pursue other relationships with men in your own area. If you two are really a wonderful couple that's going to last (because he finally decides he wants that as much as you do), you'll pull through this time of doubt on his part. If not, you'll end up finding someone who's better suited. Sorry -- this is going to hurt, anyway you cut it. But, you can lessen that hurt by not waiting around for him to decide you're the one. -- uriel
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