phasmif Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 For the last six months I have been talking to a man online and we have gotten very close. We talk for a few hours every nighttime and started out as just friends. In this stage he bought me an expensive (but practical) gift. Recently things have become romantic in nature rather than platonic. We have decided to meet up. Problems are as follows.. he is 25 years older than myself and lives some two hundred miles away. Hes also married though it went stale years ago as is confirmed by friends who know us both and the fact he can talk at any given point. We have discussed all these things seriously and think we both deserve a change at happiness. Our friends thibk the same. But is it too much? Is it better left as fantasy? I have two children as does he.
River Rain Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 Objectively speaking, I wouldn't take it any further because he is still married. For me, if you're okay with his age, that shouldn't matter. But if his marriage went so stale, then why is he still with her? And you both have kids to consider...personally I would look elsewhere.
Author phasmif Posted October 8, 2012 Author Posted October 8, 2012 I would generally outright agree. Its against my better judgement. However the marriage is all but over and he lives as a single person. His children are grown up. Basically as he says its just hes not seen any point in making a complete split and is worried for her mental health when he does. I've honestly never met a man I felt as strongly about.
oaks Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 Basically as he says its just hes not seen any point in making a complete split and is worried for her mental health when he does. So he'll be carrying on this affair with you in a clandestine manner for the same reason, I guess.
Author phasmif Posted October 8, 2012 Author Posted October 8, 2012 We haven't been at all secretive. After some discussion it was decided we meet up and then decide what we do in the future.
Author phasmif Posted October 8, 2012 Author Posted October 8, 2012 Also, thid has taken us both a little by surprise..
Survivor12 Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 I'm not sure that I understand.... You say that he is living "as a single person"--is his wife aware? Also, if he is concerned about how a divorce may affect his wife, why would he flaunt an affair? Sorry, but it just doesn't make sense. If he truly cares about her, he would either honor his marriage or divorce her before involving himself with another woman OR, at the very least, be as discreet as possible.
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