JHparkes Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 I mentioned one of my insecurities to my boyfriend of three months. I was very wary of telling him and I felt sure that he wouldn't be very keen on it. But he said "he actually found it quite sweet that I am insecure!" Is this a red flag that this man has issues himself???
oaks Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 Is this a red flag that this man has issues himself??? If being empathic is a red flag then, sure. However, my real view on this is: WTF??! 5
TaraMaiden Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 I mentioned one of my insecurities to my boyfriend of three months. I was very wary of telling him and I felt sure that he wouldn't be very keen on it. But he said "he actually found it quite sweet that I am insecure!" Is this a red flag that this man has issues himself??? Re-read you question. Have you any idea how ludicrous it sounds? A man who accepts your insecurity has problems? Good grief..... 2
Rosane Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 (edited) Well, it is a strange comment, no matter how reassuring he may sound. This could be a red flag, true, but it's early days, so only you know it. Have you asked him what he meant by that? More than what he says is what he does, his actions and his behaviour towards you. Maybe he didn't know how to put it. Maybe he just meant- I accept you for who you are- but got the wording wrong because he only meant to protect you. Edited October 8, 2012 by Rosane
yongyong Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 I think you should meet a douche bag who will look at you like a insect when he heard that 'what?? you are this and that??' I know some girls are turned on by this.
HeldbyGravity Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 (edited) I mentioned one of my insecurities to my boyfriend of three months. I was very wary of telling him and I felt sure that he wouldn't be very keen on it. But he said "he actually found it quite sweet that I am insecure!" Is this a red flag that this man has issues himself??? I think I know what he meant to mean, having had experience before with a guy who wasn't always smooth with words, or clear. I think he just means that it is cute that you are vulnerable. That isn't as bad as it sounds- it's why we find babies and puppies cute. If something shows NO vulnerability, it is more tough, cold to us. It's different than saying, "I am glad you are insecure", it's more towards, "I am glad you are human/not full of yourself". If I could guess, he seems to have meant it in a good way. Just awkwardly, and perhaps he should have followed with telling you that you've no need to be insecure about these things- maybe he is planning to do that in the future. Edited October 8, 2012 by HeldbyGravity
todreaminblue Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 I mentioned one of my insecurities to my boyfriend of three months. I was very wary of telling him and I felt sure that he wouldn't be very keen on it. But he said "he actually found it quite sweet that I am insecure!" Is this a red flag that this man has issues himself??? Its a pretty vague thing to say....you have an insecurity abotu tellin gyour boyfriend that you have an an insecurity and he accepts it so you are insecure about what exactly????and what is your insecurity....i dont know if it is me ....but i feel a little confused as to why you are insecure in the first place...you should be relieved........maybe its my disorder but i hear twilight zone music playing....doooodododoooooooothis this is the twilight zone zone zone...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVSRm80WzZk ahhh so its not my disorder its just youtube...........deb
Leigh 87 Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 My boyfriend also says it is "cute" when I have not seen him after a vacation, and at the airport I am all uptight and nervous about what I look like. He was terrible with words at the start of our relationship too, although he has much improved!
xdahliax Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 I mentioned one of my insecurities to my boyfriend of three months. I was very wary of telling him and I felt sure that he wouldn't be very keen on it. But he said "he actually found it quite sweet that I am insecure!" Is this a red flag that this man has issues himself??? It's kind of hard to know if it's a red flag or not because we don't know what it was about, or how he behaves the rest of the time. On its own, it's not a red flag. Ideally he wouldn't tell you that it's sweet but that he likes you the way you are and that there is no need to be insecure. But we can't all say the right thing at the right time.
SJC2008 Posted October 8, 2012 Posted October 8, 2012 I mentioned one of my insecurities to my boyfriend of three months. I was very wary of telling him and I felt sure that he wouldn't be very keen on it. But he said "he actually found it quite sweet that I am insecure!" Is this a red flag that this man has issues himself??? What if he does have issues/insecurities. Will that be a red flag? You have them so why can't he??
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