Dessembrae Posted October 6, 2012 Posted October 6, 2012 It's been just over 3 month since the break up and 2 weeks at a second attempt of NC after running into her at the pub. I thought I was doing really well had accepted the break up, was moving on and had met new people but last night I started to get this loneliness creep over me where I really started missing her before bed, then today couldn't get her out of my mind and now just feeling the loneliest I can ever remember feeling... I know the break up had to happen but I just miss her like hell.
Minka333 Posted October 6, 2012 Posted October 6, 2012 Sorry for what you're going through. It's alright. People normally go through that phase. It is better to release it by crying. When there's no more tears left, we feel much much lighter. It lessens the heaviness in our chest. When you're feeling better, distract yourself with other things. Time will come when you'll get numb and tired from feeling lonely. Be strong!
JSJS Posted October 6, 2012 Posted October 6, 2012 Agreed, stay strong! Focus on you and how you can move forward now. Every couple generally had some good times and sitting around reminiscing will be torture for you. I'm not saying to focus on negative things either but you seem to accept that for some reason it made sense to break up so use that decision to move on. Hobbies, friends, movies all help distract you.
Bahndrvr Posted October 6, 2012 Posted October 6, 2012 It's been just over 3 month since the break up and 2 weeks at a second attempt of NC after running into her at the pub. I thought I was doing really well had accepted the break up, was moving on and had met new people but last night I started to get this loneliness creep over me where I really started missing her before bed, then today couldn't get her out of my mind and now just feeling the loneliest I can ever remember feeling... I know the break up had to happen but I just miss her like hell. I'm going through the same feeling right now myself man, We are about a month into a "break" requested by her, and she is not interested in anyone else, she just has said from the beginning before we got married she would need to spend some single time and make sure I was the one. Well I didn't propose back in July and we are where we are now. Very long story, I posted it last night. Anyway, The nights, and the mornings are the worst for me. We had certain ways we slept, and we always had to be touching each other in our sleep, it was quite awesome. However it's a nitemare, seems I don't want to lay down without her there so my mind races and races thinkikng about all the good in our lives, then the darkness comes for me and I can't figure out why, at this point in our relationship did she run away. so you say you understand the breakup had to happen, your definately ahead of me there, cause I don't know why it is happening to me. Be thankful that you have made it this far, I belive relapses are normal, and I belive taht if you choose to move on, you will:) I can also tell you there is a reason people tell you to turn to god, I did it about 2 weeks ago and it has made quite the difference, the hollow feeling is not really there anymore, I'm newly saved, and my heart is so full of god right now it's not funny. That however does not take away from the pain and hurt that I'm feeling for my Lisa right now:( Stay strong, if you made it this long before the hook back up, then you will be able ot make it even further until your over it.
Author Dessembrae Posted October 6, 2012 Author Posted October 6, 2012 Still feeling it again this morning. You know it never ceases to amaze me how one girl walking out of my life can absolutely floor me even when they are still around and i know i will see her again sooner or later yet when people close to me pass away and I'll never see them again I can accept it was a calm understanding...
Author Dessembrae Posted October 6, 2012 Author Posted October 6, 2012 I have an overwhelming urge to look on her Facebook to see what she's been up to or if she's seeing anyone, I'm more then aware this is a terrible idea which is why I deactivated my account months ago but my curiosity is starting to really get the best of me
itsmisterheartbroken Posted October 6, 2012 Posted October 6, 2012 I know exactly how you feel man. I'm a week into a full blown breakup with NC and it's very difficult, especially because I know my ex is probably already sleeping with someone else. The way I see it is it's a test of will and self realization. We only feel this way because we allow ourselves to. We can't let the actions of others dictate the way we are going to live our lives. Honestly think about it, did you really do anything to deserve this? Answer is probably a resounding NO. We are currently just dealing with natural human emotions. We re going to be upset and sad, but with time it'll pass. The most important thing is to MOVE FORWARD. We cannot allow ourselves to be set nack in life because of someone else. Ever. Better yourself and learn to be happy ALONE, and in due time it,ll be so much easier to be happy with somebody else that's DESERVING. Good luck.
Author Dessembrae Posted October 6, 2012 Author Posted October 6, 2012 Haha actually that's the part that makes this even harder, fact is i had a big part in pushing her away and causing the break up. It's never all one person and there wasn't anything like cheating or neglecting each other just things weren't working out and it happens. I just want her to be happy so I'm leaving her alone and letting her live her life. Just sucks on my end dealing with it.
itsmisterheartbroken Posted October 6, 2012 Posted October 6, 2012 I know man believe me... I am going through the same feelings. I just want them to go the hell away. It sucks there is nothing we can do to make the feelings of emptiness vanish.. Vanish as easily and quickly as our ex's feelings seemed to have vanished for us. That's life I guess..
Author Dessembrae Posted October 6, 2012 Author Posted October 6, 2012 Sooo i dunno if any of you believe in signs or any of that cr@p but i just got a txt from a friend i haven't talked to in years and all he sent were the lyrics to a song about getting over an ex. He had no idea about the break up just random. put a smile on my face
UPSandFedEx Posted October 6, 2012 Posted October 6, 2012 Trust me I understand. My ex and I share a 20 year friendship and are trying to maintain that. The NC thing hasn't happened as we are maintaining the friendship but yesterday was my day to feel the real loneliness creeping in. I spent most of the day in tears over it actually and broke down and told him how much I missed him which I later apologized for. Some days are just harder than others for me. Yesterday the weather here was dreary and cold so maybe that is what did it to me. I have vowed to have a NC weekend with him and so far so good.
Author Dessembrae Posted October 9, 2012 Author Posted October 9, 2012 so i caved in and txted her that night told her that i wasn't sure what i was doing with this txt but that i had been thinking about her a lot lately and kissed her, i asked if she had any free time next week and if we could meet up. she replied said the last time i saw her at the bar two weeks ago she got the impression i really didn't want to talk to her at all but that she might be free she had to check her work schedule. Not too sure what i want to do now... To be completely honest i still miss her like crazy but i dont know if anything will really come of this.
Author Dessembrae Posted October 9, 2012 Author Posted October 9, 2012 ok back to NC. clearly it way to early for me to try talking to hear if my emotions are going to get a jumbled up like they did
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